Almost everyone has friends who have some kind of incredible magnetism. Without hesitation, they can make a request to a random passer-by and support any conversation. It's all about charisma - a set of individual character traits that evoke sympathy and a lively emotional response from others. Anyone can become a charismatic person, if only they do painstaking work on themselves and get rid of everything unnecessary that pushes them into boundaries.
Traits of a Charismatic Personality
In a broad sense, the term “charisma” refers to the ability to win people over solely through strengths. Purposeful leaders with a set of certain characteristics decide the destinies of entire peoples and countries, shape the political agenda and forever inscribe their name in history.
Mahatma Gandhi, Mao Zedong, Vladimir Lenin and many other bright people who changed the world knew how to infect people with their ideas, instantly acquiring an army of like-minded people. However, charisma is not only characteristic of great leaders and spiritual mentors. Among ordinary people, whose names did not appear on the pages of textbooks, there are also strong personalities who are capable of making an indelible impression on others. They are distinguished by the following features:
- loyalty to one's principles;
- strong motivational sphere;
- the ability to penetrate into the inner world of another person;
- willingness to take risks and take responsibility;
- eloquence and acting skills;
- sense of humor;
- non-standard behavior, sometimes contrary to accepted social norms;
- the ability to attract and retain the attention of a wide audience;
- memorable appearance.
A charismatic person inspires admiration, respect and trust among others, thanks to which he can easily manage other people. Contrary to popular belief, charisma is not a mysterious natural gift; the same can be said about female charm. Only those who train interpersonal communication skills and constantly improve themselves can become the soul of the company and a role model.
Positive attitude
Having set yourself the goal of gaining charisma, first of all you need to learn positive thinking in order to appreciate every moment that life gives. People are intuitively drawn to those who talk about everyday things in a positive way. Anyone can complain about an unfair fate, but only a few can look into the future with a winning smile. Regular implementation of the following psychological techniques will help you develop the skills of charismatic behavior, and at the same time increase your self-esteem:
- Laugh at yourself. If a person is able to smile sincerely when it comes to him directly, others begin to think that he is devoid of complexes.
- Adapting your humor to different people. Once you find yourself in a company where jokes below the belt do not cause rejection, you can give free rein to your wit. When in the company of serious men or women who appreciate subtle humor, it would be more appropriate to tell a funny story that does not go beyond the bounds of decency. It’s generally better not to joke with people you don’t know well without a clear reason.
- Teasing your interlocutor. “Teasing” a close friend will help you boost your charisma and improve your communication skills. But you shouldn’t go too far, so as not to accidentally offend a friend by turning a seemingly completely innocent joke into an insult.
When trying to develop charisma using humor, the main emphasis should be on the quality, not the quantity, of jokes. A person who tells jokes left and right can easily receive the title of buffoon. A short, witty saying sometimes produces a much greater effect than a series of drawn-out stories.
Female charisma
A woman who is not deprived of nature, who knows her worth and knows how to use her main weapon - femininity, can be called charismatic. A charismatic woman is distinguished by her insightful mind and wisdom, because in tandem with a man, a woman leader is a “gray eminence”; her destiny is not to lead, but to guide the leader. A striking historical example is Cleopatra in tandem with Julius Caesar.
To develop charisma, a woman will need:
- subtle mind and erudition (the same Cleopatra knew several languages and was the most educated person in Egypt at one time);
- emotional spontaneity, naturalness;
- ability to understand people;
- self-confidence and the ability to soberly assess one’s capabilities.
The listed qualities are the basis for becoming a charismatic girl.
Working on body language
Even if a person entered the room without saying a word, those present immediately begin to form their own opinion about him, which will largely depend on how he moves and gesticulates. To look charming in the eyes of others, you need to pay attention to the following points:
- Correct posture. A self-sufficient person stands with his back proudly straight, his gait exudes confidence. He enters the room, raising his head and turning his gaze forward.
- Movement control. It often happens that when talking, the person sitting next to you continually shakes his leg or nervously taps his fingers on the table. A person who is passionate about conversation will never do this. It is important to learn how to gesture correctly so that the interlocutor can feel his importance. When talking, it is not recommended to cross your arms over your chest, as this may be perceived as emotional closedness.
- Mirroring. Literally after a few minutes of communication, you can notice what model of behavior your partner adheres to. It is worth making an attempt to get closer to him by copying his gestures. If a person behaves with restraint, then he should control his emotions, otherwise there is a risk of not being heard.
- Eye contact. When starting a conversation, even on an abstract topic, you need to look your interlocutor in the eyes and not shift your gaze to foreign objects. Anyone who is regularly distracted by their phone or checking their watch is unlikely to earn the right to be called a charismatic person capable of empathy.
Development of oratory
Although charismatic people have completely different personalities with their own unique styles, they have one thing in common: rhetorical skill. What can be done to improve speech culture?
The first step is to reconsider the manner of everyday communication. It is important to be attentive to those with whom you are having a conversation , and it does not matter whether it is a virtual correspondence between a guy and a girl or a discussion in real life with a group of people. Each audience has its own language, so you should not communicate with an intelligent adult in youth slang.
Before starting the story, the listener should be made clear for what purpose he is being addressed. A good speaker always strives for dialogue. His primary task is to encourage the audience to approve , because initially not everyone is inclined to support the speaker. When talking about something, you need to give examples from life, since real stories inspire and inspire people. It is also worth making small pauses in those places where, in the opinion of the speaker, it is necessary to focus attention.
It is imperative to develop diction. Special articulation exercises and tongue twisters will help with this.
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Keywords:_C1059, _D1030, _D1052, 1Communication
General Tips
As has already been said, anyone can acquire charisma if they wish. When setting a course for achieving success, you should use the following recommendations from social psychologists:
- Support others. What is the difference between weak-willed and envious people? Because they mercilessly criticize the more successful, and also instill uncertainty in those who are trying to change their lives for the better. Charismatic and strong natures are different. They do not skimp on compliments, provide support, and encourage you in difficult times.
- Don't try to please everyone. There is no need to look for approval on the side and pay attention to spiteful critics. Anyone who has managed to cultivate charisma in himself does not need to be liked by everyone. As they say, you won't be nice to everyone.
- Don't let yourself be offended. A charismatic leader will not allow himself to be insulted and will never follow the lead of the crowd. It is not in his principles to cowardly agree to other people's demands.
- Set goals for yourself. It is necessary to throw all your strength into realizing what you have planned, and not to float weakly with the flow, thinking that everything will fall from heaven on its own.
- Be extraordinary. A person who is not thirsty for adventure and does not take risks is boring, which means he will not be able to surprise others.
- Replenish your knowledge base. To maintain a conversation on any topic, you need to constantly expand your horizons. Books, newspapers, and visiting exhibitions and museums will help you cope with this task.
- Be a good listener. How to please your interlocutor? You need to listen to him carefully, periodically asking questions and showing interest in his life.
- Be sincere. In the modern world of hypocrisy and falsehood, people are subconsciously drawn to those who are open and do not wear a mask.
Although “charisma” is translated from ancient Greek as “God’s gift,” this set of personal characteristics is not innate. Since it is associated with internal psychological qualities and external, behavioral skills, a person can and should train it.
What is "charisma"?
There are many definitions of the concept “charisma” in the literature. True, in most cases they contradict each other and it is quite problematic to find the only correct definition. We tried to create our own definition based on numerous articles and books on leader charisma and personal attractiveness. So, charisma is a person’s enormous attractiveness in the eyes of others, special internal energy, the power of personal influence on others. Charismatic individuals are not like others; they have developed leadership qualities and high abilities in some area.
Previously, the concept of “charisma” was found exclusively in religious texts and meant “divine gift” sent to man by God to overcome suffering and achieve salvation after death. Of course, now this concept has undergone significant changes and is most often used to describe high-ranking persons, historical figures and business leaders.
By the way, our readers may have a logical question: “Why develop charisma and personal attractiveness if I am not going to become a leader?” The fact is that charisma gives a person enormous advantages in all areas of life: career, raising children, relationships with friends, marriage, etc. All roads are open to an attractive person, but charisma does not always imply exceptional external beauty. It's all about enormous inner confidence and special energy emanating from a person...
