The Internet has already become a part of our daily lives. This is far from just a way to have fun and get rid of boredom. For many, this is a source of permanent income. And on top of that, with the help of the Internet you can significantly increase your quality of life. Many things have been greatly simplified thanks to this invention:
- you can pay utility bills without leaving your home;
- you can get documents, for example, a passport, much faster;
- you can quickly find information on any issue;
- order food at home;
- or buy a cute dress;
- and much more.
And, of course, you can find your love or just have a good time with an interesting interlocutor. But not everyone, unfortunately, knows that there has long been a culture of communication on the Internet, just like in any other place. Therefore, in this article we will talk about how to communicate correctly on the Internet so as not to look stupid or downright vulgar. And (which is extremely important) to avoid getting into a very unpleasant and even dangerous situation, but this is possible.
The article was written based on the vast experience of living on the Internet =) I have time here to work, communicate, and go shopping too.
Internet communication culture
This is a reference to the culture of communication on the Internet. She is, yes! Only schoolchildren and poorly educated people do not know about this. Because as soon as you observe these two categories of people, you can cry from frustration and shame. The latter falls more into the second category.
I just want to ask the especially gifted, do they think it’s normal, when they come to the clinic, to curse the person they’re talking to in line with a good, selective curse? Or a cashier at a store? Or someone on public transport? No? Or is this normal for you? If it’s normal, then it’s a very, very pity, and there’s nothing to talk to you about. Sorry.
But what if not? If in real life, you never allow yourself to be rude or obscene towards others, but on the Internet you easily respond to your opponents with such obscenities that would make the shoemaker Uncle Petya from the village of Malye Petukhi embarrassed?
Tell me, what difference do you see? Is it that, excuse me, they can’t kick you on the Internet or something worse? Does this loosen your tongue? Nobody sees you in the eyes, and therefore you’re not ashamed? How, in general, can one not be ashamed of behaving this way?
Personally, I don't understand. I'm ashamed of you! You read such pearls, look at the avatar, and there is a seemingly decent girl, a mother of two children, but she behaves... disgustingly. What can such a person teach children?
I'll tell you some secrets:
- Such communication does not show your coolness, but on the contrary.
- You do not in any way scare or offend your interlocutor. Moreover, if your opponent answers you softly, censoriously, but extremely sarcastic or even sarcastic, then you are most likely communicating with a top troll. His only goal is to bring you into negative emotions, make you disgrace yourself, and assert yourself at your expense. He can also screenshot your correspondence and show it somewhere, with appropriate comments.
- Do you think nothing will happen to you? Everything is anonymous on the Internet! Alas and ah. The Internet is now regulated by law just like other “public places.” You need to think about what you say and write - you will be held accountable for even less. And they will definitely find you if the subject of the dispute raises questions among law enforcement agencies. Even from a fake page.
And this is just a small part. Many people make fools of themselves. I would like to remind you once again that the Internet is the same place as a park, a store, a games room, a cinema, and so on. And here, too, you need to behave civilly and decently.
The article is almost on the topic of how to come up with a nickname. We have listed examples and ways to choose a cool online nickname.
How to communicate online: basic rules
The most important thing is not to lose face and behave like a human being. Well, this is already clear to most, and therefore I will no longer focus on it. But there are other rules:
- The phrase “Hello” in one single message is evil. Because it is not clear what the interlocutor needs. Maybe he wants to talk, maybe he has a request, maybe something else. For example, I will answer “Hello” in the same way, and very often the conversation will end there. Write in detail: “Hi, I just remembered that you have a good detective library. Maybe you can give me a couple of books to read?”
- Your messages do not convey intonation. Therefore, you can mislead your interlocutor and even offend him with a simple “Well, ok.” Usually, emoticons or an ordinary bracket give the intonation color to the message.
- Don't overuse emoticons and stickers. This irritates many people. In addition, it impairs the readability of the text. And, of course, don’t even think about inserting emojis into business correspondence.
- It is not very decent to WRITE IN CAPS. On the Internet, this is the equivalent of raising your voice. And, again, reduces readability.
- If you can’t answer now, say so. It is better to immediately say that you are a little busy than to pretend that you did not notice the message. Believe me, the interlocutor knows that you are ignoring him and may be offended.
- No need to split messages. Because
very awkward to read
part of the meaning is lost
and generally speaking
do not you know
What part of the message can you already respond to?
- Re-read messages before sending! Because sometimes the built-in dictionaries do not write what you want. And in a hurry, you can type something unclear, and your interlocutor will have to guess what you meant.
- Try to write correctly. Don't ignore punctuation. They influence the meaning of the message. Remember the role of just a comma: “Execute, you cannot have mercy” or “You cannot execute, but have mercy.” Agree, the difference is significant.
- There is no need to write at inconvenient times. For example, at night. Unless you are sure that your interlocutor is not sleeping.
How to chat with a girl online
Popular question. We have already answered this in the article on how to meet a girl on the Internet. There were also examples of correspondence and weak points. Here we will only slightly supplement it with safe topics for communication.
Hobbies
. An eternal topic on which you can communicate, if desired, indefinitely. After all, almost every person has some hobbies. Maybe there is no full-fledged hobby, but in any case, we all somehow relax.
Relationship
. You can always carefully ask what kind of men a girl likes. Just build a dialogue without vulgarity and do not insist on this topic at the very beginning of your acquaintance.
Music, cinema, books
. This is also one of the win-win topics; you can always discuss the latest movies. Talk about your favorite films and musical groups. And if a girl loves to read, you can always discuss your favorite literary genres and authors.
Travel and leisure
. You can always discuss your past vacation or holidays. Talk about the places you want to visit. Or you can plan a weekend together.
Favorite places in the city
. If you are from the same city, you can always talk about your favorite parks, cafes, cinemas, and so on.
Animals
. Almost all girls love animals, many have favorite pets, and you can chat about them. I’ll say right away, for example, I can chat about cats for hours =)
Work or study
. Another eternal and neutral topic. In addition, you can always ask the girl how her day was. It will look cute and with a touch of care.
How to prepare for dating on social networks?
Quite often men encounter
with a situation when they are trying to meet an interesting girl, but all the prepared tricks do not work. Also, a girl who is attracted to a young man is embarrassed to take the first step. What to do in this case?
Dating on social networks
already suggests that the satellite is configured to communicate. There's little to do, all that remains is to interest your partner.
4 rules to follow before dating online:
- You need to think about your greeting in advance. If this is an SMS message, then it must be correctly composed, without errors in punctuation and spelling. If this is a video call, then a neat appearance is a prerequisite for a successful conversation.
- Prepare interesting topics for conversation. Spontaneous dialogues are not always successful, and communication on some neutral topics (travel, cinema, music) helps to gradually learn something new about each other.
- Decide how to properly invite the person to the next conversation or politely say goodbye. If the interlocutor turns out to be really interesting, then the exchange of contact information should be as relaxed as the entire conversation. There is no need to ask for a phone number if the person does not consider it necessary to leave it.
- Choose a time to talk. The dialogue should take place in a calm, leisurely atmosphere. Since long responses to messages and constant requests to wait can be perceived as a sign of disrespect.
You need to remember that you shouldn’t make the typical mistakes many girls and men make when meeting people on the Internet. If all the demonstrated wit and charm did not evoke the proper reaction from the interlocutor and he does not want to continue the dialogue, then you should not impose yourself. It's better to focus your attention on the one who shows interest in return.
An equally important stage is the time when young people have already begun to communicate
Online Dating. The main task here is to maintain your partner’s interest. Mutual respect and attention to the interlocutor often help to build good, trusting relationships.
Finding a friend or even a soulmate on a dating site is quite possible if you show a little courage and show a desire to communicate.
Proper communication with a guy
In fact, communicating online with a girl and a guy has a lot in common:
- many topics (see above);
- unobtrusiveness and originality;
- and so on.
constructing questions (ask open-ended questions);
However, you can add a few more items to the general list.
- Firstly, and this is important. Be yourself, don't try to make the guy like you.
- It is important not to look sad and talk about how bad the day was, how cloudy the weather was, and in general, everything is decay. Guys don't really like girls who are always whining.
- Try not to look vulgar and frivolous. You will only lose reputation points in the eyes of a man.
- Guys like to know who they are talking to. Therefore, if he doesn’t yet know what you look like, don’t torment him.
Have you been wondering for a long time whether a guy likes you or not? We will help you find out.
Where not to start communication
Now let’s take a closer look at the most common mistakes that inexperienced men make on the Internet. On the same website, param.ru, a survey was conducted among girls, in which they answered which men they would never communicate or date with.
If a man has a profile without a photo, this is the first sign of an unserious or deceptive approach to communication. The girl is unlikely to communicate with such a visitor.
If a man writes an offer to become his mistress and promises mountains of gold, not a single girl will agree to this, since girls are looking not only for a rich man, but also for someone who loves and is the only one. And treating oneself as a thing is disgusting for a woman.
Here's what you shouldn't write to a girl on the Internet:
“I’m healthy. Let’s go for a walk” - too rude and too fast. The girl doesn’t know you yet, and hasn’t really talked to her to understand who you are, and you’re immediately taking the bull by the horns.
“You’re hot, I want you” is a too quick transition to the topic of sex. Girls don’t like this and are against such a start to communication, understanding your interest solely as a desire to sleep.
“I invite you to a cafe (to the cinema, for a walk)” - as my grandmother says, “right off the bat.” Trying to get a girl from the Internet to offline without talking and without spending several days in interesting conversations on a dating site is a useless endeavor, doomed to failure in advance. That’s what dating sites were created for, so that girls and guys could weed out those who are not suitable for them, even at the stage of virtual communication.
Also, you should not start communication with flat jokes, and in general, humor on business and without business is bad form. Of course, humor is needed, but it should be present only in the form of a small additive, like a light seasoning for a meat dish. It's as simple as going to a restaurant: it's very dangerous to oversalt your food when you don't know how much salt the girl adds to the food. Same with humor. Maybe in front of you is a girl with an extremely subtle sense of humor, and you, like a bull in a china shop, will start the conversation with some flat nonsense, which will make her seem like a complete dupe.
How to communicate with foreigners?
There is one subtlety in the topic of communicating with foreigners - are you expecting something specific from this communication? That is, if you want to marry a foreigner and go abroad for permanent residence, this is a separate issue. Girls write entire manuals on how to lasso a handsome guy from the Florida coast. We will not focus on this, we will list only the basic things.
Firstly, the biggest difficulty when communicating with foreigners is the language barrier. It’s good if you and your interlocutor know at least a little one language. For example, I always ask if a person knows English, if so, then there will be half as many problems in communication.
If you both speak completely different languages and have nothing in common, then only a translator will help in communication. Moreover, you should not always rely on Google translator. He very often distorts the meaning.
However, if the purpose of your communication is to practice a foreign language and nothing more. Then it’s worth switching from communicating on social networks to special sites - language social networks:
- www.lingq.com
- lang-8.com
Visualization helps a lot when communicating with a foreigner. For example, turn on Skype. If both interlocutors are forced to communicate in different languages, with the help of translators and fragmentary knowledge of certain words that are understandable to everyone, then video communication will be a tangible advantage. But there is no need to abuse this; such communication is very tiring for some.
As for the rest, the same rules apply. Culture, friendliness, literacy and suitable topics for conversation.
How to successfully start a conversation with a frontal attack
To start a conversation, you can simply knock directly. You see that this person is suitable, you are interested in him, you would like to get to know him. Then why not try saying “Hello”? The most important thing here is not to overdo it. There is no need to immediately write a kilometer-long text and overwhelm a person with a bunch of messages.
Once upon a time, some guy on the Internet, my namesake, by the way, began to actively communicate with me. And for some reason he decided that I was proficient in the topic of website development. Well, I told him that I’m not serious about this. And he told me: “Come on, why be modest.” I, however, was not ready for such pressure.
I then posted a video on Instagram about our kids talking about their drawings. We had a marathon like this - we published these videos. And so he likes them and writes comments... To be honest, he just annoyed me.
Such attention to my person was damn unpleasant for me. The man went overboard with the outgoing flow towards me. And he probably had good intentions, but he fucked me up. Well, you shouldn’t start communication so aggressively. And this applies not only to the Internet.
Just knock and say “Hello”, leave something on the wall, a heart, a smiley face – try to start a conversation. If he responds, then gradually the conversation may turn to how children should learn.
I wrote to a person once, wrote to him again. And slow down. Wait for him to answer you. It is important to give the person room to maneuver: he should also have the opportunity to say something. Or not to say.
Total: how to start communicating with a person on the Internet? You need to choose a suitable avatar, then touch him, and not too much: turn to him, greet him. Don't load it, cast the line and wait for it to respond.
Topics to avoid when communicating
There are a number of topics that are considered indecent to discuss with strangers. This doesn't just apply to the Internet. But for some reason, it is in it that the rule of the taboo is sometimes forgotten. So, on what topics is it better not to ask questions, and in general, skip them at first:
- family,
- former relationship,
- sex,
- material well-being,
- health,
- policy,
- religion,
- nationality,
- personal troubles,
- war and violence,
- death.
As you can see, some of these topics are too personal, some have a pronounced negative connotation, and some affect the worldview of the interlocutor. Without knowing a person, it is very easy to offend him or bring him into the negative, even without meaning to, by touching on this or that topic from the wrong side.
