How to stop being afraid of success and start taking action

  • Features of fear of success
  • Reasons for fear of success
  • Consequences of fears
  • Symptoms of fear of success
  • Features of overcoming fear
  • Conclusion

Everyone wants to become successful. Few are ready to realize their plans and dreams. Sometimes a person is hindered by life's difficulties, obstacles and bad luck. It happens that in trying to become successful people get in their own way. Psychologists are sure that this is a fear of success.

Fear of success is common

This phenomenon is common. Fear of important events can ruin all hopes of success. It is easier for a patient to refuse to participate in a case than to take the decisive step.

Features of fear of success

Research into the phenomenon of fear of success has shown that this phenomenon is quite common. Its various manifestations are observed in 2 out of 10 people. The fact is that any efforts of a person, his work, household chores, etc., are aimed at his own well-being, comfort and prosperity. This work is painstaking and complex. Having reached what he wants, all that remains is to accept the fruits of his work. Not everyone is ready to do this. Some people give up their happiness. This is how fear of success manifests itself.

What does a person lose from failure? The first is success itself, the time and effort spent.

The second is the lack of motivation for further struggle. Without this, a person stops in his own development, gives up and loses the meaning of life. There is only one conclusion: fear of success becomes the most powerful and insurmountable barrier to improvement.

How does the patient feel? His mental activity at the moment of manifestation of fears becomes confused and tense. A person suffering from fear exaggerates the consequences of his haste, dramatizes them and fills them with negativity.

There are many examples: money, promotion on the career ladder, improvement of social and living conditions - all these are changes that a person cannot normally perceive. A feeling of anxiety overcomes the patient. At the moment of fear, he may think that money will change the attitude of others towards him, a new position will ruin his relationship with the team, etc. There is a certainty that he is not ready for change, despite past desires, long work and desire for his goal. Success implies a change in social status. And this is new responsibility and problems. A person may find himself in conditions that require psychological adaptation.

Fear of failure

Most people ask the question: “What if...” Many of them phrase it in a negative way, for example: “What if it doesn't work? What if no one likes it?”

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These are the wrong questions. Instead of thinking about how you can fail, focus on how you can succeed! Even if you fail or make a mistake, it will give you an opportunity to reflect.

Reasons for fear of success

It is very difficult to talk about the reasons for uncertainty and changes in attitude towards success in the last, decisive minutes before achieving it. The reasons for fear vary from person to person. Both other phobias and living conditions, character, complexes influence. Psychological education also matters. Fear of success can arise due to:

  1. Fear of hearing someone else's opinion. Life in society is impossible without communication. Simple conversations and advice from loved ones and friends leave their imprint on the subconscious. A person projects the thoughts and desires of other people onto himself. He constantly worries about whether his actions will satisfy others. All these thoughts are filled with anxiety and loss of complete control over the situation.
  2. New worries. Having achieved what he wanted, a person finds himself in new conditions that require psychological adaptation. The conservative nature of thinking ignores achieving the best. It is easier for such people to give up success and maintain an established way of life.
  3. Fear of unpreparedness for a new social role. People's goals and plans change when they make important decisions in life. When it is necessary to accept a new social role, some people find it easier to avoid it than to begin to solve the tasks at hand. Awareness of reality causes fear in a person, a feeling of imminent failure, etc.
  4. Low self-esteem. People with such self-esteem live by established rules and perceive any success as something beyond their strength. Positive change for such people is a test for which they will never be ready.

The reasons for fear of success lie deep in the subconscious. According to psychologists, most of them originate in early childhood. When a child grows and develops, his psyche is formed, any little things can affect the ability to control his own thinking. Fear of success most often arises from family problems related to parental mistakes.

In some families, the relationship between parents and child is subject to strict rules. This may be adults’ condescension towards mistakes or constant criticism of the child on their part. The origin of fear arises due to the injustice of decisions, condemnations, etc. In adult life, fear of success can begin in a job where a person has failed. Failing an exam, interviews, undeserved criticism and other problems can break a person’s psyche.

Criticism from adults negatively affects children

Fear of looking stupid

Very often people hesitate to do what they want because they are afraid of looking stupid. They think: “I’ll do it next time.” In fact, this is just another excuse that will be used again and again. We often act as if what we want to do is wrong.

Why not do it now? The answer lies in the fact that people are dependent on other people's opinions. They are so afraid of looking stupid that they deny themselves even basic desires. You need to believe in yourself more.

Some of the world's greatest decisions were accidental. Time after time, people have spontaneously deviated from their original plans and lost their way to success. Trust your instincts and know that you are making the right decision. You will look stupid if you do nothing.

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Consequences of fears

Emerging fears influence the formation of a person’s character and ability to adapt in various conditions. The patient may have overestimated or underestimated demands on himself. This also affects self-esteem.

Leading a certain lifestyle, social activity and simple human relationships potentially pose a threat to the psyche. Any mistake or failure can become a starting point for the development of mental health problems.

The fear of success rarely manifests itself, but its existence deprives one of material wealth and the desire to develop. The fear complex can take many forms, the most common being the Jonah and Imposter complex.

Jonah complex

This concept was given to the psychological phenomenon by psychologist Maslow. This is the tendency of people to fear their own lives. The Jonah complex appears:

  • non-acceptance of one's own individuality;
  • fear of standing out from the environment;
  • fear of being the best at something;
  • fear of realizing one's own plans.

The patient is not able to overcome all difficulties due to the belief in envy, jealousy and ill will of others. It is easier for him not to stand out from the crowd than to attract attention to himself through well-deserved work, determination, etc.

A person with a Jonah complex is convinced of the constant envy of others

Imposter syndrome

This psychological disorder manifests itself in a lack of faith in one’s own strengths and an underestimation of one’s own merits. Someone with impostor syndrome may suffer from:

  • self-deception;
  • lack of confidence in one's competence;
  • fear of inadequacy of personal or social role.

It seems to the patient that his efforts are undeserved, and he himself does not have the strength to solve new problems. A person suffering from impostor syndrome thinks that success came to him by accident.

Fear of offending others

People must be bold in their actions if they are going to achieve their dreams. Many people are afraid of offending others with their self-promotion for fear that it will come off as arrogant. However, no one will recognize your talents until you show them. Unfortunately, you can spend your whole life waiting, watching your more arrogant and less talented colleagues achieve success.

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Symptoms of fear of success

The manifestation of symptoms may vary. Depending on personal qualities, upbringing and other factors, a person’s mood, behavior and even well-being may change. A person suffers from:

  • panic;
  • anxiety;
  • confusion of thoughts;
  • headaches and dizziness;
  • attacks of nausea;
  • increase in body temperature.

People may refuse any changes; they may develop a strong feeling of guilt, dissatisfaction, and prejudice towards people. They cannot think clearly and want to get advice from loved ones.

Someone else's opinion rarely influences the further development of events. The sufferer finds many disadvantages in the predicted changes and gives up, preferring to avoid any risks.

How to identify fear of success?

Identifying signs of fear is not an easy task. The object of fear itself does not exist; there is a fear of events and changes. Symptoms appear rarely, at certain moments in life. Psychologists are confident that it is possible to identify the presence of a fear of success; you need to ask questions:

  1. Is there a purpose in life?
  2. What am I doing to achieve my goal?
  3. Am I doing my best to become successful?
  4. Have there been failures and setbacks before?
  5. Are there pending matters whose resolution could lead to success?
  6. Were there any mistakes along the way to achieving your goal?

By giving answers to these questions, we can work out the whole picture of the perception of human determination and willingness to overcome difficulties on the way to one’s goal. The professional diagnosis of a psychotherapist is based on these same questions.

Until critical moments arrive, people may deny their mistakes and claim that they are ready and motivated to succeed, but motivation is where the problem lies. People become so accustomed to the struggle for their happiness, attracting money, taking up a new position, etc., that the struggle itself becomes the meaning of their lives. At a crucial moment, a person may realize that accepting long-awaited changes will deprive him of motivation, which leads to the appearance of signs of fear.

Self-analysis will reveal the problem

Reasons ↑

Perhaps for many years someone persistently pursued their goal and was completely focused on achieving it. All forces: physical, mental, spiritual were thrown onto the altar of victory.

And somewhere around the nearest turn the solemn sound of a fanfare can already be heard... But the man suddenly stops before this turn. Having traveled thousands of miles of roads, he does not dare to take the last step towards his dream.

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A person is suddenly filled with panic fear - the enemy of any forward movements. Having come close to the goal to which it was so difficult to reach, the brave helmsman can put the ship of his dreams into a drift, or give it a full reverse.

What's stopping him? Fear becomes the obstacle to overcoming the last peak! Fear of success.

Success is something new, something that has never happened before. A person, making his ascent to success, did not predict in advance that the final step would take him to a fundamentally new level of life. Man is designed in such a way that he is frightened by everything new.

A sudden wave of fear washes over you from head to toe: the old familiar life will now fall apart like a house of cards. And the new one is an equation with a bunch of unknowns.

Fear of success is fear of an unknown new life. We are used to living in a comfort zone, and it is difficult to blame anyone for this. Our home is our fortress. Our comfort zone is a little world in which we feel comfortable and safe. And no storms of life reach our quiet harbor.

Features of overcoming fear

Dealing with fears is individual. You can solve problems on your own or seek help from a psychotherapist. The specialist’s task is to determine the reasons for the fear of success and find ways to resolve them. Such fear does not pose any threat to human health, so therapy is limited only to psychological methods.

Treatment is based on instilling in the patient the benefits of success.

Independent work with fear is based on changing your own attitude towards things, yourself and your environment. Psychologists advise:

  1. Forget about the problems that caused the development of fear.
  2. Start acting without thinking about shortcomings and mistakes.
  3. Believe in your strengths and capabilities.
  4. Create comfortable conditions: make rearrangements, repairs, change the image.
  5. Get out of your comfort zone every day: drink juice rather than coffee in the morning; choose from your wardrobe not jeans, but classic trousers, etc.

Working with fears requires analyzing your own actions and actions. Having realized his past mistakes, it will be easier for a person to make the right decision in the future. You can get rid of fear only by overcoming difficulties.

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