They bully you at work, your boss is a tyrant and a tyrant

Guilty without guilt

Often in organizations or at an enterprise, a situation arises when the employer does not formally violate labor laws, but creates such conditions for an employee he does not like that he wants to leave on his own.

Regardless of education, experience and position, anyone can encounter such an unpleasant factor.

This could be personal hostility, or the boss wants to make room for some “thieve,” and therefore he does his best to force the employee out of the organization, finds fault with every little thing, starts a conflict out of nowhere, and every day of the subordinate turns into a nightmare.

Let's consider those situations when the option of “just leaving” a tyrant boss does not suit us. Of course, if an employee could painlessly change jobs, then no one would make a problem out of it at all. Naturally, each situation is unique, but I hope the advice will be useful to you in some way.

Don't write excuses

Based on practice, we can say that in order to get rid of an employee, any violation of labor discipline will be “pulled by the ears” (being two minutes late, smoking breaks, coffee breaks, personal conversations on the phone, etc.).

No matter how much we would like it, everything that does not relate to the performance of your direct functional duties is a violation of labor discipline, and therefore formally you can be subject to disciplinary liability for this.

Therefore, you should remember: never write explanatory notes at the first request of management. If you write an explanatory note, you thereby admit that you have committed a disciplinary offense.

Typical explanatory:

“On such and such a date, I went for 15 minutes to the next office to drink tea with my colleagues, this did not affect the work process, I undertake not to do this again.”

Or:

“I was 10 minutes late for work on January 28, 2021, because I was taking my child to kindergarten, and the teacher detained me to discuss such and such issues. I pledge to not allow this to happen again.”

Agree, it looks like a humiliating excuse.

Don’t write anything, let the personnel officer draw up an act of refusal to give an explanation; you don’t need to sign it either.

If you subsequently file a complaint with the labor inspectorate, and when it arrives with an inspection, looks at the materials and sees your explanatory note, it will become clear that you actually committed a disciplinary offense, made excuses for something, and then also complained.

Psychologist's advice

Constant hassle due to the unstable nature of management makes you think about what to do if your boss is a tyrant. You cannot leave the situation to chance and wait until the emotional atmosphere improves or becomes more stable - when a person is accustomed to unloading his problems on others, when he cannot distinguish his own bad mood from bad work, it is stupid to expect changes.

There are no classic tips that work for any person, but there are methods for finding an individual approach. First, you will have to observe the boss and identify his weak points - these are those topics, touching on which he gets lost or his mood deteriorates, where he becomes silent or becomes awkward. Once you have selected a set of at least several similar topics, you need to insert them every time you notice an increase in anger.

Be sure to promptly remind the manager of what is unpleasant. If he gets lost from these conversations, then the aggressive outburst will be suppressed, and if he experiences negative feelings, then a conditioned reaction will be developed when he shouts at you - he himself feels bad.

It is necessary to get out of the standard accusatory dialogue, repeating exactly the same pattern. Any ridiculous action will do to redirect the situation - spilling water, dropping things, tripping, coughing, etc. The brighter and more unexpected the distracting behavior, the more likely it is that the boss will switch from aggression to bewilderment. Develop a few confusing practices and act every time you are unfairly accused or made unnecessary claims.

For those who are still emotionally stable, the ignore option is suitable. Here the entire concentration of attention and action switches to the work process, while it is important to do your work efficiently, not to violate the prescribed rules, ignoring shouts and nagging. You can walk around the office of your tyrant boss or leave in the middle of a sentence if you are being shouted at, remaining in contact only under the condition of normal business interaction.

When the tyrant is not the top management, but the intermediate head of the department, then open conflict tactics can be used. With the next inappropriate statement, you directly and calmly declare that you will no longer tolerate such treatment towards you. This is a challenge after which a serious confrontation will begin, which professionalism and mastery of techniques for abstracting from the situation will help to withstand. This cannot be applied to the very top management if there is a desire to retain the position, because... it is an attack on the establishment of rules. This is suitable for middle managers, because... even if the conflict escalates, the issue will always be resolved by the final directors or business owners.

It's not that easy to get fired

One might even say it is very difficult. In any case, it is not as simple as it seems to your superiors. No one has filed a lawsuit for reinstatement at work, and in court the burden of proving that you were fired legally falls entirely on the employer.

It is the employer who must prove to the court the legality of your dismissal, and then the court will get to the bottom of everything, and the employer will have to explain why all the big shots in the organization fell on one employee.

There is a whole stack of disciplinary orders against one employee, and the rest, it turns out that, white and fluffy, is everyone else really crystal clear? And what is this act of absence from work for 10 minutes, who signed it, why not in the form approved by the Ministry of Labor, where is the explanatory note, where the requirements for giving explanations are described, how it is confirmed that it was handed over, and so on.

In general, if the court reinstates the employee, the employer finds himself in an unenviable position, especially if he has already hired someone for this job.

Procedure for dealing with insults from your boss

We believe that the procedure for influencing management can be determined depending on what exactly the manager is trying to achieve through insults and humiliation.

Important! If a boss or boss yells and humiliates an employee, trying to force him to resign, then it is necessary to contact the labor inspectorate with a complaint regarding forced dismissal.

In this case, it is obvious that the manager has no legal grounds for dismissing you, however, for any reason he does not intend to keep you at work. Therefore, I am forced to influence you psychologically. You should not give in to provocations.

Important! Perhaps, for starters, you can threaten your boss with contacting the labor inspectorate if he does not stop such actions. Or if the situation is worse than ever, then you need to contact the labor inspectorate.

In such cases, as punishment, employers are held accountable for violating labor laws. The sanction is quite harsh and involves a warning or a fine:

for officials - from 1000 to 5000 rubles;
for individual entrepreneurs - from 1000 to 5000 rubles;
for legal entities - from 30,000 to 50,000 rubles.

As a rule, legal entities in such cases are given a fine in the maximum amount provided for by the sanction of the article.

In a complaint to the labor inspectorate, you must indicate the essence of the situation in chronological order, indicate the details of the employment contract (attach it to the application), and leave contact information. In practice, the application first indicates when and with whom you entered into an employment contract, then describes the situation itself, and, if possible, attaches evidence confirming your arguments.

Initially, it is necessary to understand the conflict and find out why the boss is shouting. If the employee is truly wrong, then it is necessary to admit it. Otherwise, it is recommended to defend your opinion, but do it as tactfully as possible:

Indifference. It is worth paying less attention to the words of your boss and in case of mistakes, do everything to correct yourself. Once the error is corrected, the conflict must be forgotten. If you take quarrels to heart, this will lead to regular nervous breakdowns. Health is more valuable.
Calm. Try to distract yourself. Calm your breathing. Close your eyes and imagine that you are somewhere you have always wanted to be. Be calm and cool. The manager will see that there was no reaction from you. This will upset him, because such leaders as choleric people will expect the conflict to develop.
Accepting guilt. In the case of real guilt of the employee, it is recommended to engage in self-criticism and fully admit that you were wrong.
Analysis. Every angry state of a leader needs to be carefully analyzed.
Appeal. It is obligatory to address in a formal style, often call by name.
Warning. You can resort to recording your boss’s speech on a voice recorder when he mocks you. Don't forget to warn him. This may make him more reserved.
Conversation. Don't forget that there is the usual frank dialogue that will help you sort things out. In dialogue, you should not be rude or complain.

The procedure for dealing with regular insults coming from your superiors directly depends on the goal to which he strives with such actions.

In a personal dialogue with the employer, you can also threaten the labor inspectorate, where you are going to apply for it. This will lead to positive results. In such cases, the authorities may, under Art. 5.27 of the Code of Administrative Offenses of the Russian Federation, face a substantial fine - from 1 to 5 thousand rubles. in the case of an individual and 30–50 thousand rubles in the case of a legal entity. It also provides for disqualification of up to 3 years.

If the relevant authority takes the side of the victim, the legal entity will be fined in the maximum amount.

When filling out the application, be sure to indicate the employment contract number and do not forget to leave details where you can be contacted. If you back up your words with video or audio evidence (correspondence or witness testimony is also suitable), then success is guaranteed.

The simplest and most painless option for a subordinate, if the manager insults and humiliates, is to resign from this place of work. But not everyone can afford to leave their position.

First of all, you can try to explain to the offender that you will contact higher management if he does not stop his attacks. If the boss continues to insult the subordinate and does not respond to requests, write a complaint. It can be submitted to the director of the branch where you work, or sent even higher - to the management of the parent company.

However, higher authorities do not always respond to such requests. In this case, you must complain to the labor inspectorate.

If your boss yells and humiliates you, use one of the following methods to contact the labor inspectorate:

through the official website of Rostrud (registration on the government services portal will be required);
through the website onlineinspektsiya.rf;
make an appointment for a personal appointment (be prepared to have to adapt to the specialist’s work schedule);
submit the complaint in paper form in person or send it by mail.

The fastest option is to submit your application via the Internet. On the Rostrud website or onlineinspektsiya.rf. Select the topic of the question, then indicate:

place of work - name of organization, address, tax identification number;
information about the manager;
the essence of the violation;
FULL NAME;
your contacts;
The way to receive a response is via the Internet or Russian Post.

Attach files and submit the form. A response must be provided within 30 business days.

You can complain to the prosecutor's office if the insult of a subordinate by a superior falls under Article 5.61 of the Code of Administrative Offenses of the Russian Federation. Let's consider the features of this type of offense.

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Article 5.61 of the Code of Administrative Offenses of the Russian Federation does not establish sanctions specifically for insults at work; it considers this offense in general terms. It is important to know that only phrases, gestures or actions in an indecent form are considered offensive if the offender’s goal is to humiliate the victim.

If a boss insults a subordinate and his actions fall under an article of the Code of Administrative Offenses of the Russian Federation, draw up a statement and send it to the prosecutor's office. Indicate in it:

all circumstances of the violation;
name of the organization and full name of the head;
your details and contacts.

The prosecutor may decide to initiate an administrative case or refuse. You can challenge it with the higher management of the department employee or in court.

The deadline for investigating the case is one month. After its completion, the materials are sent to the court. There the case is being considered for another two months. This is the maximum period. However, due to the workload of ships, it may be increased.

Administrative resource

It is definitely worth complaining to the labor inspectorate; this is the body that is directly responsible for checking the legality of employers’ actions in relation to their employees, and considers complaints and appeals regarding violations of the labor rights of employees.

This body is directly in charge of these issues, therefore, if there is no direct violation of the law, you should not try to jump over your head and write complaints to the Investigative Committee. The same prosecutor’s office will forward your complaint to the labor inspectorate, so you should contact them immediately so as not to waste your own and other people’s time.

By virtue of the law on the procedure for citizens’ appeals, the labor inspectorate is obliged to respond in any case.

If she comes to inspect your organization, they rarely leave without a protocol on an administrative violation. They will check everything and not only based on the fact of the complaint, they may also find something else, but the fines for violations in terms of the labor inspection are very large, and challenging these fines in court is, as a rule, useless.

If you intend to file a complaint with the labor inspectorate, in some cases it may be prudent to provide a copy of the complaint directly to the employer as notice before filing.

If the boss is not completely beaten, then he will consult with a lawyer, and he will tell him that “the game is not worth the candle,” it is better to go easy on this employee, because the labor inspectorate can create big problems and cause losses to the organization.

In the complaint you should write only about the violation of your rights, preferably with references to the labor and administrative codes; you should not get personal and write what kind of boss is an asshole.

In general, in order to competently draw up a complaint, it is better to contact a specialized lawyer, because he knows how to draw up an appeal to a government body so that this body does not get away with a formal reply.

What to do if your boss yells at your employees: survival instructions

Constant contact within the team involves daily communication between employees and management.

But sometimes employees are forced to quit due to inappropriate behavior of management - the boss yells and insults, especially in the presence of other employees.

What to do if a manager regularly humiliates the honor and dignity of a subordinate? How to behave and where to complain about a boorish boss? We'll tell you further.

Professional lawyers and psychologists do not recommend responding in the same tone, but also not agreeing to the aggressive behavior of management.

The optimal solution is to choose a neutral position and contact competent specialists. In this case, it is important to have evidence of humiliation in the form of witness testimony, video or audio recordings, which will confirm the manager’s inappropriate behavior in court or when contacting the labor inspectorate.

Collect evidence of rudeness on the part of the boss and attract witnesses to punish him.

To put your boss in his place, you first need to determine the form of such requests and the severity of the consequences:

rudeness or humiliation due to personal hostility provides for administrative liability;
the insult affects your nationality - can be classified as inciting ethnic hatred, Nazism and racism;
public insult in the media or humiliation without reason or evidence is also an administrative offense.

Do not ignore even a single fact of insult. This threatens an unpleasant continuation.

If your manager has insulted you publicly or does it every day in a hidden form, then it is better to involve an experienced lawyer in the case. A lawyer will help you correctly qualify the manager’s actions, refer the case to the court or the police, and ensure a positive outcome for you.

Correctly determine the elements of the violation, and then file a statement with the police.

The legislation on the issue of infringement of a person’s honor and dignity provides for several articles.

You can involve your employer and immediate supervisor under the following headings:

for slander without grounds or evidence - Art. 128.1 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation;
for periodic humiliation and torture in a team, which led to suicide - Art. 110 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation;
on issues of discrimination and public humiliation - Art. 5.61 Code of Administrative Offenses of the Russian Federation.

In judicial practice, Art. 5.61 Code of Administrative Offenses of the Russian Federation for personal insult.

For slander using one's official position, a fine of up to 2 million rubles is imposed. or compulsory work up to 320 hours.

In case of suicide due to constant humiliation of a subordinate and his discrimination by shouting, the manager will be removed from his position, sent to forced labor or to prison for up to 6 years.

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For yelling and humiliation, the boss will “unfasten” up to 50 thousand rubles to the state income.

Many organizations deliberately provide for rules of corporate etiquette, enshrining them in their charter or collective agreements. If the company’s internal regulations are violated, you can complain about insults to the manager to your immediate superiors, and in case of protracted disputes, to law enforcement agencies.

If your boss insults and humiliates you at work, and there is no control over him within the company, then resolve the conflict using more severe methods:

File a police report

She is obliged to accept the document and review it within 3 days. Based on the results of the investigation, an administrative case will be opened under Art. 5.61 of the Code of Administrative Offenses of the Russian Federation and will collect a fine.

Complain to the Labor Inspectorate

If your boss yells and humiliates you for a specific purpose (for example, to get you fired due to personal hostility), file a complaint with the Labor Inspectorate.

Write a complaint to the manager

In the event of unjustified aggression on the part of the immediate superior, you can complain to higher management, which is obliged to take measures in accordance with Art. 195 Labor Code of the Russian Federation.

File a claim in the city court, providing evidence. Such a resolution of the dispute will make it possible to obtain compensation for moral damage.

If your boss periodically yells and humiliates you, you can file a report with the police. Please take into account a number of requirements when preparing the document - be sure to indicate:

your full name, passport and contact details;
place of work and address of the organization;
information about the offender - position, personal data;
circumstances of the conflict;
names of witnesses who are ready to confirm the facts of humiliation and insults from the manager.

Don’t forget to put the date and signature, and also attach evidence of the insult - video or audio recordings.

If you have a similar situation in your relationship with management, do not let things take their course. Seek help from professional lawyers and resolve the conflict within the law.

Every able-bodied citizen of our state is in one way or another connected by labor relations: he works, he is surrounded by colleagues and has a direct supervisor.

We spend most of our lives at work, therefore, we want to see a favorable environment around us while working and a good relationship with colleagues and management. But, unfortunately, everything is not always smooth and sometimes the boss is rude and insulting. How to resolve this situation?

Dear readers! Our articles talk about typical ways to resolve legal issues, but each case is unique.

If you want to find out how to solve your particular problem, please use the online consultant form on the right or call

It's fast and free!

Maybe he's trying to force you to quit or is just a boor? Let's consider different situations.

When applying for a job, an employee expects to see a competent boss, an excellent professional and just a good person who will coordinate and check the work performed. But sometimes all hopes for professional cooperation with the boss are dashed against the rocks of rudeness, shouting and insults. In general, does a director have the right to shout at an employee?

The employee, first of all, is at a loss from such actions, but perhaps there is a reason for such a reaction from the boss. As a rule, through such psychological influence, the boss tries to achieve the dismissal of the employee at his own request. Thus, avoiding additional proceedings regarding unjustified dismissal on our part.

The employee, having experienced psychological pressure, does not want to stay to continue the employment relationship with this boss.

What if we look at the boss’s actions from a different angle? What if he is a boor by nature?

Of course, it is unpleasant to endure such an attitude, but quitting because of the rudeness of your boss and looking for a job during an economic crisis is also a hasty decision. Attempts should be made to ignore the boorish behavior of the boss. Perhaps you should accept this point as a fact and not take rudeness personally.

But you must remember that if a manager insults and humiliates you, then this is already a reason to bring him to administrative responsibility.

To resolve a conflict with superiors, it is necessary first of all to negotiate and find out the circumstances that cause shouting, insults and humiliation of the employee.

Suppose that the employer is not satisfied with the professional qualities of the employee, then it is necessary to find out how to correct the situation.

You should discuss with your boss the insults you received and ask not to repeat them in the future.

But, unfortunately, there are cases when the confrontation between the two sides of the labor relationship continues and is accompanied by humiliation and insult to the employee.

Insulting an employee in the workplace is an action of the boss, which will not in any way affect the employee’s better work performance, is not a factor in the manifestation of his professionalism, but can become the basis for bringing him to justice.

If your boss insults and humiliates you at work, you should first resort to negotiations, discussions and other peaceful ways to resolve the conflict situation. There is a chance that by finding out all the details, you will settle the conflict.

If there is a superior manager above the boss who is showing insults and humiliation towards you, you should contact him with a complaint and describe the conflict that has arisen. If there is no higher management and a direct appeal to the boss does not bring results, you must contact the following authorities:

Labour Inspectorate;
police;
prosecutor's office;
court.

For more information on how and where to file a complaint against an employer, read the article at the link.

When sending an appeal to the above authorities, as a rule, a check is first carried out for violation of rights, and if the fact of violation is confirmed, the guilty party is held accountable in accordance with current regulations.

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One of the key circumstances when writing an appeal is the evidence base. To prove insult and humiliation, an employee must provide:

audio recordings;
video recordings;
written documents;
witness's testimonies.

If there is a fact of written insult, these letters and notes should be attached. As a rule, insults are accompanied by the uttering of words that humiliate the honor and dignity of a person. Repeated accompanying humiliations should be recorded on a tape recorder or indicated in a witness statement.

Get team support

The last advice will be so everyday, but we cannot do without it. It consists of the following: remember that no one likes brawlers. That is, there is no need to show off your knowledge of the law and talk to your boss in such a way, they say, “if you try to fire me under the article, I will cause such problems for you!”

Remain calm and whenever they want to punish you for something, simply politely and correctly ask management to explain the meaning of their actions, the basis on which you are being held accountable.

Don’t turn the team against yourself, this is completely unprofitable for you, let everyone see that you are a normal, adequate person, and only the boss is wrong here.

Even if, for obvious reasons, none of your colleagues dare to openly stand up for you, at least your colleagues will be on your side. This is important because, in the end, if you lose this fight and leave this place of work, already looking at your empty place, your colleagues will remember you with a kind word among themselves, and your reputation will follow you to a new place of work.

During this cold war with your superiors, at the same time, continue to conscientiously and regularly perform your job duties, work, be a punctual worker, and be less distracted by extraneous matters and conversations during working hours. This will make it clear to both the team and management that essentially there can be no complaints against you.

From the life of tyrant bosses and ways to fight them

Most often, people with a certain character make it to the top, which leaves negative imprints on the subsequent attitude of the boss and subordinates. Below is only a small fraction of the wide variety of positions in which those who climbed higher have those who remained lower. Well, just in case, ways to deal with them.

The general manager of the company did not allow any of the employees to enter the elevator with him. If he got into an elevator, everyone had to get out, and he rode alone.

Another director demanded that when he arrived at work, the elevator was always at the bottom so that he did not have to call it. The security guard always called the elevator 5-10 minutes before his arrival and did not allow anyone to use it until the boss came to work. If, upon the boss’s arrival, the elevator was not at the bottom, he fined the guard.

Further more…

The commander of the garrison in which I served forced all officers to use the same perfume; if anyone used a different one, he reprimanded him.

The store director did not allow his employees to bring lunch from home and forced them to dine exclusively on shawarma, because... in his opinion, the employee should have had lunch within 15 minutes.

The head of the department believed that all his employees should have the same ringtone on their mobile phones.

The branch director fined employees if they smoked next to each other in front of the office. If someone went out to smoke at the same time, they had to stand on opposite sides of the building.

In the common dining room, the director had his own waiter and a table that served only him, despite the fact that there was self-service. None of the workers were allowed to sit at his table, even if he had already had lunch.

Another department head, also in a self-service work cafeteria, demanded that the waiters serve him. Although the general director, when he came down, stood in line with everyone and helped himself to food. When he came with the general, he stood in line with everyone else.

The store director demanded: (I quote literally) If someone gets sick and doesn’t come to work, he must notify me at least 3 days in advance! Otherwise I will fine you! I'm not interested in sick leave!

The head of the department told sick employees, when they brought in sick leave, that if you get sick again this year, it means your health does not allow you to work, write a statement and quit.

The chief accountant eliminated from the department any employee who had any pet, no matter a cat, a dog, a bird, a hippopotamus. Hated people who have pets.

The director of the enterprise from 17:45 to 18:15 - 18:30 stood at the entrance and watched those leaving work at 18:00. Anyone who left work at this time received a reprimand or fine. Workers had the right to leave only after he left the entrance.

Another director did not allow employees to leave before him at all. Even if he sat at work until 9 pm, everyone also had to sit and do something.

The store director installed only a urinal in the men's restroom so that employees would not have to go to the restroom “too much.” I thought that men shit for too long.

source

Bosses are different: smart and stupid, kind and evil, cunning and not so cunning. Unfortunately, there are also real “scumbags” who for some reason decided that their position and social status allow them to humiliate the dignity of those who depend on them to one degree or another. What can you do, money and power often spoil people. You shouldn’t give in to the big bosses who call you names, sputter and stomp their feet in rage. You need to be able to talk to them. And do not forget about your interests. There are behavioral strategies developed by psychologists specifically for such cases. If kissing your boss somewhere below the back is not your style, read this article carefully

You may be the target of disdain or humiliation for showing up to work without a tie; for being accidentally late; for not understanding the order that was given to you, etc. The most common situation is that you made some mistake. Your manager discovered it and lets you know that you should not have acted that way, that you are no good, etc. This is done in a rude and insulting manner, very often in front of witnesses. Unfortunately, many managers consider the opportunity to point out their mistakes to a subordinate as another reason to show their superiority. They love to focus attention on this, savor the employee’s miscalculations, thereby humiliating him as a person.

Your possible actions: Option 1. Of course, instead of listening to the boss’s nonsense, you can always publicly declare in appropriate terms that you are not on the same path with such a boss. After which, naturally, all that remains is to leave the office with your head held high. “Having said this, the count retired with dignity. All in white,” the Strugatskys, it seems. But on the way to the labor exchange, you will ample your own pride, remembering how you put “this cretin” in his place. True, a less pleasant scenario may happen: the boss’s security will take charge of you and you will not leave the company on your own, but fly out into the street with your things.

Option 2. You flare up and answer in the style of “he’s a fool”: say that he has no right to criticize you, because he himself makes mistakes, he himself is late, etc. And in general, you are a qualified specialist and are able to cope with the work without his instructions.

This is a bad choice. Bosses don't like it when subordinates point out their shortcomings, especially in public. Therefore, I cannot predict the result. Most likely, it will be the same as in point 1. You will lose your job.

Option 3. You fall to your knees, tear your shirt on your chest, sprinkle ashes on your head, humbly apologize and ask for mercy on you. Then say that you are sorry, that it was stupid on your part and that it will never happen again.

This option is slightly better than the previous one. By replacing anger with mercy, the boss can grant you his forgiveness. Only one thing is bad. If you have even a drop of self-esteem, you will not be able to get rid of the feeling that your feet have been wiped all over you for a long time. In addition, by resignedly accepting humiliation addressed to you, you recognize your own insignificance. By demonstrating a lack of pride and self-respect, you risk that not only your manager, but also your fellow employees will eventually stop taking you into account. The fact is that the phenomenon of imitation is very developed in organizations. And if an authoritative leader or boss, God forbid, chooses you as a “whipping boy,” sooner or later his behavior will begin to be copied by other employees. A flock follows its leader - the ancients knew about this.

I am convinced that you deserve more. In the end, you came to the company to sell your professional knowledge, experience and skills, and not yourself personally. Therefore, showing self-esteem is quite appropriate. You can defend your interests and keep your job.

Option 4. First, it is best to let the boss speak, that is, “blow off steam,” before trying to answer. Wait until he is able to listen to you. Next, you admit that you made a mistake, that you regret it and will be more careful next time. Then you add that your boss (boss) speaks in a rather harsh tone, and you do not see the need for this. Secondly, it is best to sort things out with your boss in a confidential environment.

And one more thing: do not try to give your boss ultimatums like: “If this happens again, I will immediately leave your company.” Bosses hate it when subordinates set conditions for them. In the end, you can always write a letter of resignation without Chinese warnings. It’s better to just say that this style of behavior prevents you from concentrating on your job responsibilities. Then politely but firmly ask your boss to moderate his ardor.

Of course, there is a risk that you will be fired, even if you raise objections in the correct form. There are psychopathic bosses who do not tolerate any manifestations of self-respect on the part of their subordinates. They require a slightly different approach. (I’ll talk about this below.) But most managers respect those employees who honestly express their own opinions in the appropriate - confident and correct form, without hurting the pride of their boss

*** Humiliation can take not only a verbally aggressive form. No less offensive is the so-called. passive derogatory behavior. These include offensive jokes, ironic remarks addressed to you, sarcastic smiles, a politely dismissive tone of orders, and contemptuous notes in your boss’s voice... All this is done with the goal of humiliating you, but it is done in a veiled manner and as if casually.

In such cases, you should not pretend that you do not notice the humiliation. If you remain silent, you seem to be agreeing to treat you in the same way in the future, recognizing the boss’s right to consider you something insignificant, not worthy of special attention and, especially, respect.

In such situations, the following strategy helps. Don't try to suppress your feelings. Tell him that your boss’s behavior bothers you and that you don’t like jokes directed at you at all. Ask him directly what this means.

When you seek clarification, you have the opportunity to “put” your counterpart in his place. That is, you caught him (her) playing a not entirely fair game, demand an explanation and make it clear that you should be treated as an equal. Moreover, you do this in a correct and confident manner, so a good relationship between you and your boss may well improve

*** However, there are bosses to which applying the above strategies is not only ineffective, but also dangerous. Usually these are bosses with an extremely unbalanced temperament and excessive excitability, which regularly finds outlet in outbursts of uncontrollable emotions: from “quiet tyranny” to wild fits. To sort things out with them at such moments means to bring big trouble on your head.

Oddly enough, such bosses are often loved and respected by their subordinates. This is the classic “father-director” type. Everyone believes in him. He is the unquestioned leader. Workers treat him as nothing less than a benefactor. And there are reasons for this. He punishes and rewards at his own discretion, usually does not like to fire people due to staff reduction (“better to win, but together”), everyone can turn to him with a personal problem. For this they forgive him a lot: mistakes, bad habits, rudeness.

But when he's nervous, it's better to stay away from him. If his nerves are at their limit, he gives a beating to everyone who comes under his hot hand. And at the same time he does not stand on ceremony in his expressions. True, he quickly forgets about it. Therefore, at such moments it is useful to remember the old soldier’s wisdom: “Away from the authorities - closer to the kitchen.” Try to stay out of his sight for a while, and the conflict will resolve itself.

Another type of boss is much more dangerous - sadistic psychopaths, also known as “classic” tyrants. Unlike the previous ones, these humiliate their subordinates not in a fit of uncontrollable anger, but consciously and purposefully, for their own pleasure. And if such a boss chooses you as his victim, you will not be able to sit quietly in a corner.

There are quite a few social psychopaths in leadership positions today. Unfortunately, current life in our country lends itself to this in every possible way. They are characterized by qualities such as a complete lack of remorse, vanity and uncriticism in assessing their own actions. Plus the ever-present syndrome of suspicion of everyone and everything in all sorts of intrigues. The arrogance characteristic of such types (a strong type of nervous system!), combined with infallible self-confidence, usually paralyzes the will and ability of resistance in the victim. In addition, they have a well-developed instinct for people who are psychologically weaker than them. And well-developed intuition allows you to avoid real fighters who are capable of adequately responding to such a style of “leadership.” All these qualities allow social psychopaths to achieve significant career heights.

It has been established that the psychotype of a tyrant boss, oddly enough, almost completely coincides with the psychotype of... a serial killer. This is a bird of a feather. Only one receives the highest pleasure by shedding rivers of blood, while the other longs to “drink” it drop by drop, tormenting and humiliating his subordinates day after day. For both, primary motivations - sexual lust, morbid aggressiveness or thirst for revenge, are bizarrely transformed into an intoxication with power and a desire to dominate people. In everyday life, both are often gray and unremarkable people. How can one remember the quiet teacher Chikatilo or the “simple worker” Onoprienko. And office monsters, who terrorize entire teams at work, are often henpecked at home by their wife or mistress.

Even coming to a company where a psychopathic boss rules is sometimes difficult. Terrorized workers jump up like automatons and rattle off the memorized text. Like, our company is the best company in the world, etc. Although, this makes a great impression on people who are inclined to be timid in front of strong authorities. (“A real leader! And what a team he has!”) Such a boss masterfully finds out exactly the method that is applicable to a particular employee. It will make him feel guilty, it will scare him. Everything is used - an ironic smile at the right moment, and a rude shout.

The ideal employee for such a boss is a slave, whose knees should tremble just from the mere sight of the boss. And such managers begin to intimidate their employees already during the hiring process—at the interview. Therefore, you will always have time to weigh the pros and cons and decide for yourself whether it is worth working in such a company. I do not urge you to loudly slam the door and give up any attempts to occupy the desired position in such an organization. Just prepare yourself for a certain style of behavior with your future boss.

The most important thing is to learn to shake off that sticky fear that they will try to cover you with. A sadistic boss always tries to put his subordinate not just in dependence, but in alarming dependence, and if he succeeds, then he brings this anxiety to convulsions. Don't give in. And get into less verbal altercations with him. Such bosses are experienced demagogues and brilliant orators who shamelessly and skillfully confuse their opponents. They have well-developed conversation techniques. They know how to confuse their interlocutor with one remark and prevent the development of a thought if for some reason they do not like this thought. In addition, such bosses have a very distorted logic of thinking: “If an employee contradicts me, it means he is not afraid. If he’s not afraid, it means he doesn’t respect him.” Therefore, those who are not afraid to openly object to their boss do not stay long at such a company.

And protecting yourself from psychopathic bosses is easy. If you are too annoyed by the terrifying “dances” of your boss, you just need to mentally put a wall between him and yourself. Create a screen between you. To do this, imagine an impenetrable wall. What you build it from is a matter of your imagination. Made of brick, steel, armored glass, just dense air, a magnetic field... And you will suddenly see how the big boss splashing with saliva and stomping his feet will become absolutely indifferent to you.

In this case the change is striking. They suddenly become polite and calm. Even friendly ones. Most often, they develop a feeling of respect for a person beyond their control, whom they cannot “break through.”

Psychologists also advise covering such bosses with an imaginary glass. But this is no longer entirely humane - they begin to feel very uncomfortable, get nervous and, feeling their powerlessness in front of you, begin to take out their anger on other employees.

Learn to evoke such calm indifference in your feelings and turn it on when you need it. At least with this technique you are guaranteed against unsolicited pressure on your personality

*** Finally, I’ll tell you how to “besiege” an overly proactive boss. There are bosses who do not seem to be bloodthirsty, but are quite capable of driving their subordinates to quiet madness with their idiotic undertakings and “valuable” instructions. For example, you are a specialist and have been developing a project for six months. Finally, inspired, you take it to the big boss for approval. What follows is a typical situation. The big boss, who understands as much about the specifics of your activity as a hare does in geometry, nevertheless considers it his duty to point out your mistakes and demands that you make adjustments. You understand that this is a disaster for the project, that the proposed changes put an end to it. You understand, but you can't do anything. It is useless to argue with the boss - they enter the boss’s office with their own opinion, and leave with the one they know.

In this case, the golden rule of the subordinate . It is well known to all experienced bureaucrats. Firstly, you must greet even the most idiotic undertakings of your superiors with visible delight and demonstrate irrepressible zeal. Secondly, you must systematically inform your superiors about your progress. The most difficult and responsible third stage: here you need to wait until the moment when the boss’s fervor subsides a little; and only then begin microscopic “injections of truth.” The highest skill is to turn things around so that the bosses themselves forget about their idiotic initiatives.

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Bosses are responsible people. They make sure that every employee works productively and brings profit to the company. Their work is accompanied by stressful situations, and how the boss is able to withstand them depends on what type of leader he is.

If he gets excited quickly and does not know how to control his emotions, then this is a classic “leader-father” type. He punishes and rewards everyone at his discretion, loves when subordinates turn to him with personal requests and has the authority of an indisputable leader. He is loved and respected in the company. Most employees treat him as a person who will help out in difficult times and will never fire him from work without a serious reason.

But in moments of irritation and anger, it is better to stay away from the “father leader”. He yells at everyone who gets under his hot hand. At the same time, he can threaten with dismissal, insult and humiliate the “careless employee.” But after an hour he forgets everything and talks to him as if nothing happened. It is useless to sort things out with the “leader-father” and express your opinion to him during his “wild fit”; he considers himself irreplaceable and cannot stand it when someone contradicts him. Therefore, if your boss belongs to this type of leader, then try not to catch his eye during conflict situations, and when he yells at you, listen to him carefully and pretend that you completely agree with him. Express your opinion later, when the “father-leader” has calmed down and is in a good mood.

It is much more difficult to establish contact with a “tyrant leader” who, by his nature, loves to command and yells for his own pleasure. Unfortunately, recently this type of boss has been found especially often in leadership positions. Their inherent arrogance, combined with power, makes them real despots and tyrants. The only way to please the “tyrant boss” is through sycophancy and lies, since he is not familiar with such concepts as honesty, remorse and self-criticism. Unlike the “leader-father,” the “boss-tyrant” is not respected in the team, but he constantly keeps his subordinates in fear. He deliberately humiliates them, punishes them by depriving them of their bonuses, and enjoys his power.

There are always several people under his command to whom he deliberately does not raise their salaries and on whom he most often takes out his aggression. The “boss is a tyrant” has an excellent instinct for people who are psychologically weaker than him. He makes them “whipping boys”, and he deliberately avoids people who are capable of giving him a worthy rebuff. Oddly enough, all these qualities allow the “tyrant boss” to achieve the favor of top management and significant career heights.

After all, he makes a great impression on people who are inclined to respect a person for his “fighting” qualities. They speak of him with admiration: “This is what a real leader should be!” The “tyrant boss” has the ability to masterfully transform himself: in front of his management he is businesslike and successful, and when communicating with a subordinate, he smiles ironically and tries to make him guilty. This type of boss is very vindictive, insidious and vindictive. Their goal is to humiliate and insult the subordinate, to take revenge on him for everything and everyone. Therefore, it is very important when working with such a boss not to give him the opportunity to choose you as a “whipping boy.”

To do this, while communicating with him, maintain your self-esteem, be confident and do not be afraid of him. If he starts yelling at you in public, don't blush, don't make excuses, and don't apologize. In the event that his accusations are not true, look him straight in the eyes and say: “Let's communicate with you in a calm tone!” or “I find it much more pleasant to listen to you when you speak calmly.” If you say these words in a loud and confident voice, they will definitely stop the yelling boss. Hearing them, he will immediately fall silent, but after a while he may again try to raise his voice at you. And here it is very important not to express complaints to him in an irritated tone and not to leave the workplace slamming the door. At the moment, you should only be concerned about one thing - making your boss respect you. Speak in a calm and businesslike voice: “It seems that you don’t understand now, but I can no longer continue the conversation with you in this tone.” After such words, the boss will lower his tone, and you move on to expressing your opinion on the topic under discussion, no longer hurting the pride of the “tyrant boss.”

If he constantly sends sarcastic remarks and jokes at you, do not ignore them. Choose a time when your boss will be alone in the workplace and ask him directly why he is prejudiced against you. Explain that you like your work, but you have the impression that something in your behavior does not suit him. When communicating, be correct and calm. Even if the “tyrant boss” asks you to write a letter of resignation, behave with dignity and do not get into verbal altercations with him.

The main thing is not to forget that we are treated the way we ourselves allow. Love yourself, develop your knowledge, prove yourself to be an initiative and hardworking person so that you are respected and appreciated by your work colleagues. And even the “tyrant boss” will not raise his voice or dare to yell at a valuable employee.

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Have you ever had weird bosses?

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