I don’t want to work, I want to stay at home: why is this happening and what should I do if I don’t want to go to the office at all?

What to do? Psychologist's advice

In a situation where you do not want to work, the help of a psychologist will be useful. Here's what they recommend in this case:

The first thing psychologists advise doing in such cases is to change your attitude towards the work being done. This is not an easy task, but you have to try.
ADVICE! Explain to yourself that work is a way of earning money for you. What you do doesn't have to be your purpose. Carry out your duties conscientiously and get paid for your work, and you can leave hobbies and self-discovery for later.
In your spare time, think about what you would like to do and whether it is possible to change your profession in the shortest possible time. Practice shows that nothing is impossible! Start training. It is quite possible to prepare yourself for a different life after a hard day at work.
Try to take a vacation or at least sick leave if you haven’t allowed yourself this luxury for a long time. A reboot will allow you to fully relax and look at your work with new eyes. You may notice new positive traits that have been missing. Needless to say: we underestimate proper rest, although without it the brain cannot function normally.
Consider changing jobs if you no longer want to work the way you are now. The following situation often occurs: a person likes his specialty, but is terribly unlucky with the team. Especially this problem sooner or later overtakes timid people who dream of simply doing their job and not participating in office intrigues. Or maybe you're just tired of working in an office?
BY THE WAY! Perhaps you should also think about remote work - now this is a fashionable format that is becoming more popular every day.
Psychologists generally advise changing jobs every 7 years to avoid burnout. But what if you are tired of your profession? Well, find the strength to change your activity. It's never too late to do this! At any age you can learn and get a new job. Of course, over time it becomes more difficult, but you will live in harmony with yourself and your needs.
Give yourself time to sit back. For example, if you are a married woman, explain to your husband how you feel. Just say: “I don’t want to work, I want to stay at home.” Let him take charge of earning money himself. And you will think about your own purpose and adjust your plans for the future. Otherwise, use your own savings to give yourself a reset.

Ways of personal motivation for work

Personal motivation is a powerful tool that encourages an individual to develop and improve themselves. If all your thoughts are focused on finding a reason not to go to work tomorrow, you need to take decisive action. By understanding how to want to work, you can forever get rid of the uncomfortable feeling of a cornered animal, which has to obey circumstances against its will. There are three groups of incentives to work:

Awareness of the need to benefit society, a desire to provide assistance of a different nature. Based on similar motives, doctors, teachers, and firefighters choose their profession.
Receiving material rewards, which implies the use of benefits and the acquisition of necessary things for oneself and members of one’s family. Satisfying spiritual and material needs in the modern world is possible if financial resources are available.
Satisfying the need for self-realization. Work, considered as the basis of self-expression, allows a person to express his innate desire to create.

Society encourages the working person. In this regard, the individual experiences a feeling of pride as a result of recognition of his merits and respect from other members of society. Motivation promotes the realization of talents and increases social status, helps in achieving goals, and makes you move forward. Motivation is the energy that fuels an individual's aspirations.

Motivation is based on the goals that an individual sets for himself. Personal motives encourage you to do what you like. Motivation under the influence of external and internal factors can subside and regress; motives are a constant value that depends on the psychotype, characteristics of thinking and worldview of the individual. Once you understand your motives, you will be able to influence your motivation. How to increase work motivation:

Eliminate demotivating factors. You should not focus on results that, in the individual’s opinion, do not satisfy the boss’s requirements, goals and objectives. From the point of view of increasing motivation, it is more correct to think more about the successes achieved in the work field.
Set realistic, achievable goals for yourself. It is impossible to embrace the immensity. When taking on a new project, you need to realistically assess your strengths and capabilities. If the boss has entrusted a responsible task that requires more knowledge and experience than the performer has, it is worth discussing the likely difficulties and results in advance.
See opportunities that arise from performing routine work duties. If you have to carry out tasks that do not bring you pleasure, it is better to switch unpleasant thoughts and the resulting negative emotions into a positive direction. To do this, it is enough to think about the material reward that is due for the work done and about expanding financial opportunities to satisfy your desires.

According to American psychologists: V. Vroom (Victor Wroom) and E. Deci (Edward Deci), the more an individual is satisfied with his work, the more personal motives he has for doing it. And vice versa. Motives and job satisfaction are interrelated values that influence each other with an increasing effect. Their compatriot, social psychologist Douglas McGregor, argued that work itself can bring moral satisfaction to an individual without the participation of external factors (material reward, social approval).

This is due to the natural need of a person for physical and mental work, as well as for rest or entertainment. Thanks to the biological mechanisms inherent in nature, the average man in the street, under certain conditions (favorable production environment, low labor intensity, loyal control system), is able to voluntarily take responsibility for solving work problems, while making every effort, using all his creative potential.

Based on these theories, it is easy to draw conclusions that a person a priori has a desire to work. If you are reluctant to go to work, it means that the natural mechanisms of biological self-regulation are malfunctioning. Having found out the reason for the state when you don’t work at your job and don’t want to go to work at all, you will be able to understand what factors negatively affect the process of personal motivation.

If you don’t want to work, you need to remember the power of self-motivation and do things that will help strengthen your desire to get a job. Perhaps the optimal incentive to search for a vacant position and work in general will be the thought of traveling, buying a new gadget, or an expensive gift that in the future you will be able to give to a loved one, parents, children, or family members.

What to do if the profession is not suitable?

Let us dwell on this point in more detail, since this reason occurs all the time. People experience a feeling of acute disappointment: the pictures that the imagination painted in childhood and even at university are shattered by cruel reality.

For example, it turns out that being a teacher is not only noble and interesting, but also very painful. This is not only communication with children and joy from their success, but also nerves...

In short, there are many similar cases. Let's look at the most popular ones.

So, the teacher is at school .

It’s no secret that the education sector is going through hard times right now: teachers bear a huge part of the monotonous bureaucratic work, so there is almost no time left for rest.

IMPORTANT! Fatigue accumulates on all fronts: your psyche may suffer from the ugly behavior of children in class, and sometimes nothing can calm them down.

Communication with parents is a separate topic: each person considers their child smart and unique. How can you explain that Vanya got a bad grade not because you are bad, but because he is a slacker? In general, it’s not a job, but an obstacle course 24/7.

Kindergartener.

Almost the same situation as with the teacher: most are not satisfied with the small salary, although the responsibility is huge. Of course, these are little children! They need an eye and an eye.

Fatigue accumulates day by day, and not physical, but moral, which is sometimes much worse. Children require complete dedication, and at one point the teacher may burn out and want to take a well-deserved rest.

Lawyer.

This is a job that requires attentiveness and concentration: not everyone can boast of these qualities, especially if you chose education just like that, without a soul, because it’s fashionable.

A huge number of the same type of papers and documents, the same type of cases... And you can’t forget a single little thing, because the lives of other people depend on your work.

BY THE WAY! Young specialists in this field are also not happy - entering the profession is accompanied by a meager salary as a legal assistant, but you have to live on something.

Accountant.

The same story as in the case of the lawyer, only worse. An accountant has no right to make a mistake. Many processes are now automated, but this does not mean that you can launch a program with a couple of buttons and drink tea.

In addition, there are irregular working hours: there is no escape from audits, everything must be in order.

Doctor.

Thankless job! Every doctor deep down dreams of having a private practice or at least working in a private clinic, but not everything is so simple.

Regular public clinics become hell not only for visitors, but also for doctors. There is a lack of funding, which is why there are no necessary medications and examination equipment.

Of course, poor conditions irritate patients, and they take their anger out on medical workers. We won’t mention the high degree of responsibility - everything is clear.

Salesman.

The advantages of this work can probably be found, but the negative aspects clearly outweigh, judging by people's reviews.

IMPORTANT! The constant influx of buyers forces us to work non-stop. Of course, this is difficult, and over time the reaction decreases. Clients are annoyed.

Who will like it? Constant work with money also does not add joy: where there is finance, there is responsibility.

How to force yourself to get a job?

I don’t want to look for a job: what should I do? You sit at home, your parents or spouse pay for you. At the same time, everything seems to suit you; you don’t want to look for a job. Let's look at it from society's perspective :

you are not useful
have a low social status,
not interesting,
you have no money
pension and insurance transfers do not go to you,
you don't pay taxes.

Society condemns those who do not work , especially if they are men.

They stop respecting you, and your relatives and friends look at you with bewilderment as to how you can sit at home and not strive for anything.

Let's look at it from your side:

you have no means of subsistence or very little,
you are financially dependent on other people,
you lose your self-esteem because you realize that you have a low social status,
you have no development, and if a person does not develop, he begins to degrade,
you stop being interesting to yourself,
prevailing mood, depression and neuroses due to lack of self-realization.

What to do to force yourself to find a job:

Set yourself a goal, to become more successful, to make a career, to earn a certain amount, to help your family, choose for yourself.
Look at your life today realistically, what you have achieved, where you are, who is next to you.
Stop feeling sorry for yourself and looking for excuses.
Take responsibility for your life, do not look for blame in other people or situations.
Get up, open some classified ads, and go to some interviews.

Is it possible not to work anywhere at all?

Everyone unanimously repeats that it is a shame not to work in the 21st century. You need to be an independent person and rely only on yourself.

But what can you do if the thought of work disgusts you? You want money, but you don't want to go to the office. Will you really have to live in poverty? Not at all! There is always a way out. Here are some options.

For women - marriage.

The most obvious method for many. Find a man who dreams of becoming the head of the family and being responsible for the household. You will organize everyday life, give birth to children and raise them.

If your lover happily agrees, you have nothing to worry about. He will be glad that his wife quit and doesn't want to work anymore.

Saving.

People who don’t accept the idea of work in general often do this: they get a job, as they say, don’t hit someone lying down, and start saving at the same time.

A big salary means a lot of trouble. It’s better to deny yourself another purchase than to fray your nerves. Well, such logic has a right to exist, perhaps it will suit you too.

BY THE WAY! Saving is easy - keep an eye on promotions, turn on reasonable consumption mode, don’t throw away old things, but repair them. Now this lifestyle is very popular, even very wealthy people come to it.

Renting out real estate.

Do you have an apartment that you inherited, but it’s worth nothing? In vain - rent it out! For some, it's like getting a second salary.

What to do if there is no apartment? People, especially older people, prefer to rent out a spare room. For example, students. A small amount will still fit into your budget, and it won’t be boring.

Natural economy.

Life in the village is very difficult - it is not surprising that the process of urbanization has gone so far. People are moving to cities in droves.

But don’t rush to draw conclusions - in many ways, running your own household is more profitable than buying food in a supermarket. You grow the contents of your refrigerator yourself! Isn't it wonderful?

ADVICE! First, try planting something in your dacha. If you live in favorable climatic conditions, a good harvest will allow you to save a lot or even start small sales among friends. True, we also need to work here...

Causes of the condition

To understand why people don’t want to work, you need to remember that a person is a biological organism that often reacts to a situation reflexively, on a subconscious level. When a person does not want to go to work to the point of tears, it is hardly a matter of ordinary laziness.

Rather, a negative perception of a place of work is associated with conflicts that arise in the team or a subconscious reluctance to do something that is unloved and uninteresting. When you don’t like work, every little thing (a busy parking space, traffic jams, many routine responsibilities) throws you off balance and aggravates psychological discomfort. Reluctance to work occurs for various reasons:

Constant stress associated with insufficiently developed communication skills, negative attitude of employees or boss. Stressful conditions can develop due to the inability to complete an assigned task, unsatisfactory work results, or a negative assessment of the final product by colleagues or partners.
Deterioration of health. Sometimes decreased performance, chronic fatigue, and increased fatigue indicate pathological processes occurring in the body. A visit to the doctor and a diagnostic examination will help determine the causes of poor health.
Lack of professional skills and qualifications. When an employee fails to cope with his responsibilities, he is criticized by his colleagues and boss. Even if unsatisfactory work results can be hidden, the individual constantly experiences a feeling of anxiety, internal disharmony, and suffers from the awareness of his own incompetence. If something doesn’t work out, this is not a reason to give up your dream and a good position. We must continue to work, honing professional skills and gaining practical experience.
Survived tragedy. If the reason that you don’t want to go to work is related to a recent breakup with a loved one, the loss of loved ones, or other family problems, it is important to understand that focusing on your grief is not the best help in solving problems. In such a situation, it is easier to distance yourself from unpleasant memories and completely immerse yourself in the work atmosphere. Think about the fact that many people live in worse conditions, but do not lose heart.
Tight work schedule. The situation when an employee must spend most of the day at the workplace can be corrected by offering the boss a different work schedule option and convincingly arguing the position.
Management sets difficult or unrealistic goals. To avoid having to force yourself to work, you need to act like a sane person. For example, openly explain to your boss that his demands are too high and why it is impossible to fulfill his instructions.

If there is no desire to work at all and the reason lies in the psychological discomfort that the employee experiences when coming to the workplace, it is better to find a way out of the situation in a timely manner rather than putting mental health at risk. Perhaps the best solution in this case would be to change the company.

If it is difficult to work in the office all day, and limited physical activity provokes a decrease in performance, you can ask for a transfer to another position that involves moving around the city (negotiations with partners, purchasing office supplies, consumables).

Often a day off or a vacation helps you get ready for productive work. Having changed the environment, rested and looked at the situation from a different angle, many manage to return to the work team full of strength, enthusiasm and energy. Educational Internet programs, correspondence or evening courses, and private lessons conducted by a specialist in this field will help eliminate problems associated with an insufficient level of qualifications.

Example sentences

Let's look at the above rule using specific examples that will help you remember it better:

This was not a hunt, but a complete disgrace.
What I saw was not a hunt, but a simple race through the forest with hounds.
If it weren't for the hunt that will take place tomorrow, I would be completely bored at this ranch.
My father prefers fishing, not hunting.

In these sentences, the word “hunting” is used as a noun, and “not” is used as a negative particle.