The habit of saying “yes”: why it’s bad to be trouble-free at work
One of the most common difficulties is having to turn people down. And although situations often arise at work in which, due to your professional responsibilities, you simply cannot say “no,” other circumstances will arise from day to day that provide you with a certain freedom of choice. How to exercise your right to say “no” and correctly formulate a refusal?
Think about it this way: by not saying “no” at the right time, you will put the other person's needs before your own. Is this what you really want? There are many situations at work when your needs are no less important, and in some circumstances even more important than the needs of your colleagues. Remember how often your colleagues refused you. And you calmly and without irritation accepted this answer. So why worry about someone being upset if you behave in the same way?
The real problem is that saying “yes” all the time can easily become a habit, and changing a ingrained behavior pattern is really difficult. Remember your colleagues. Can you guess what to expect from each of them? Probably yes. Similarly, your colleagues, having become accustomed to your dependability, will most likely begin to turn to you with so many requests that you simply cannot fulfill them. Thus, the habit of constantly agreeing to requests at work will lead you to overwhelm, because you take on more than you can do or what you really should do. This leads to stress, frustration, hostility, conflict and mistakes, and it only gets worse over time.
So, the ability to say no when you feel like it is necessary is an important skill to master. You will probably have situations where you want to help someone, even if it makes you feel uncomfortable. Remember: assertiveness means respecting your needs and rights as much as the rights of others, and agreeing to compromise when necessary.
Many people don’t like to say “no,” believing that the only way to do it is outright refusal. This “no” may seem rude and aggressive. And this is usually not the impression you want to make at work. You strive to establish good relationships with colleagues, but you will inevitably have to refuse someone for your own sake - your health and well-being. This means you must be able to say no, but in a way that shows respect for the other person's needs. There are different ways to refuse, depending on the situation. Here are three main options.
Outright refusal is the most uncompromising method and is rarely suitable for use at work. It is most often resorted to when someone's rights are violated. In such cases, you can loudly and firmly add: “Can’t you hear, I said no.”
A request for additional information or a promise of “some other time” is an opportunity for discussion, while refusal remains an option.
A thoughtful “no” is the most sensitive way because you show that you have listened to the other person.
Below I will explain in detail what each of these options is, but the choice will depend on the situation, your attitude towards it and who is making the request, because this could be your mentor, your direct manager, a colleague or a team member who you really care about. want to help.
Don’t try to radically and suddenly change your behavior. This is especially true for refusals, as you may shock colleagues who were not expecting the leopard to suddenly change its color. It is much better to start small, train hard and change gradually.
How to politely refuse a guy without offending him
Refuse to meet someone when you are not interested in him
It is much easier to refuse further communication to a stranger than to an acquaintance, so don’t make a big deal out of it. If a similar situation arises somewhere on the street, simply answer: “Sorry, I’m in a hurry. Besides, I have a boyfriend.” Such a short and very informative answer will probably save you from an unwanted acquaintance.
Refuse an invitation to a date
If we are talking about a young man you don’t know well, then the situation is simpler - you have the opportunity to almost painlessly stop all further attempts to get closer. The easiest way is to say that you already have a boyfriend, and he obviously won't be happy if you decide to go on a date.
The situation is a little more complicated if you know a man well who wants to invite you to a romantic meeting. In this case, he is probably aware of the details of your personal life. If you are not sure that you will not change your mind about this guy, then say that in the near future you are busy with work (study, family matters), and you can return to this conversation no earlier than, for example, in a couple of weeks. During this time, you will be able to think about everything and decide how interesting this young man is to you. If you are convinced that you do not want to go on a date with him in a month or a year, then you will have to act more decisively. Be clear that you don't want to date at this time. You don't have to go into details. Explain to the man that you treat him wonderfully, but look at the situation soberly and see no point in transferring your relationship with him to another format.
Useful tips and tricks
There is a universal way to refuse to date a guy. The phrases you pronounce follow the same pattern. It is called “Compliment - Program - Compliment”. This is an ideal way to refuse politely, so as not to offend your interlocutor and maintain good relations.
Example:
- Start with a compliment: “You are very nice, I enjoy spending time with you.”
- Then voice the unpleasant (program): “But I’m not in love with you/I have a boyfriend/I doubt your sincerity.”
- And end with a compliment: “I’m sure such a well-mannered and intelligent man like you will understand me and will not insist.”
If the guy is adequate, he will understand the first time and hear the necessary information. If he really needs you and is not in a relationship, he will make attempts to win your heart by proving his feelings with actions (applies to the “I doubt your sincerity” option).
Note! The PDA scheme works with normal, decent men. On manipulative, highly primative guys (used to getting everything by force, lacking intelligence and doesn’t understand the word “no”), this method does not work, alas.
How to refuse if he doesn’t understand?
How to refuse a man's offer to date if the previous method did not help? Unfortunately, there are guys who don’t get it the first time, stubborn and stubborn. You need to act decisively with such people - block them on social networks, blacklist your phone, avoid any contact. It’s great if you have a husband, boyfriend, brother or friend who can talk like a man to an obsessive admirer and firmly explain that he shouldn’t approach you.
Important! Tough male talk is a last resort. First, try to politely refuse yourself - in most cases it works.
- How to refuse if he does not take your words seriously?
Your polite but categorical refusal was made. But there are guys who perceive such female behavior as flirting, coquetry, an attempt to provoke him. What to do in this case?
Most guys will accept a correct refusal as long as you explain the reason. Don't be afraid to speak directly - it's better for both. Source: Flickr (Peter_Kremzar)
Most likely, you were not convincing enough. Then words need to be confirmed by actions. Proceed in the following order:
- Voice the refusal using the “Compliment - program - compliment” method.
- Block the guy on social networks, blacklist his phone.
- After this, he should understand that you were not flirting, but really do not intend to date him.
Then there are two options - he will retreat or take active steps to win your heart. In the second case, you can’t do without “man’s talk”.
- How to refuse correspondence?
It's better not to do this at all. A guy who has a crush on you deserves a private conversation. Don't be selfish - talk.
How to tactfully refuse a man's offer to date
It is important to convey to the man that you really do not want to date him, but this should be done very delicately. However, he should realize that your “no” is just that, and you are not trying to “pull yourself up” or anything like that. You must voice your refusal in a personal conversation, avoiding the presence of any witnesses.
Don’t forget that if a man offers you a relationship, it means that at least he likes you, he singled you out and noted you. That is why you should not behave arrogantly or aggressively with him, treat him with understanding.
Admit that his attention flatters you, and you treat him with respect as a person, but you do not want to give him vain hopes, “lead him by the nose” or keep him in uncertainty. Tell him that he deserves to immediately know about your true attitude - you are not against maintaining friendly relations, but you do not see him as your chosen one, and you are sure that this will not change. It is quite possible that after this you will really be able to establish friendly contact with this guy for many years.
How to politely refuse a man? The right way
By now you can see that indirect denial methods are not a suitable method.
The smartest way is to be honest and direct . Not only for your safety, but also out of respect for men.
Of course, you still want to approach the situation with tact. You should be polite and not attack them by saying, “I just don't find you a very attractive or interesting man. I can’t imagine having sex with you.” This will anger a lot of men.
Try instead...
“I had a lot of fun on our date, but I don’t feel the same chemistry with you.”
"You seem like a great guy, but I'm just not interested in you."
"Thanks for a wonderful evening! Sorry, but I don't see us as compatible. Good luck on your future dates."
Will each person accept these deviations gracefully? No. But this is the best way to politely refuse a man, which will end well for both of you.
How to properly refuse sex to a guy so that he doesn’t get offended
Of course, if you do not have a close relationship with a guy (you are not dating as a couple, you have not expressed serious feelings for each other), then you should not worry that refusing sex will offend him - this is a completely natural answer. Say directly that intimacy is possible for you only in a relationship with your boyfriend or fiancé, but not otherwise.
It's another matter if we are talking about a young man with whom you are already in a relationship. In this case, since you are together, it is obvious that you like him and in the future you are considering the option of having sex. In this case, gently explain to him why this is impossible right now. So, what are the options:
You need to get used to it
Some girls find it difficult to decide to have sex almost immediately after they start dating a young man. Tell your guy that you are one of those girls who needs to fully realize that you are now a couple, and you want to get used to this feeling. Give an approximate time frame. Speak confidentially and softly. If a guy cares about you, he is unlikely to insist. However, it is still important to indicate at least approximate deadlines.
You are a virgin and this is an important step for you
If this is really the case, then there is no point in hiding it or hushing it up. Admit to the guy that you have not been intimate with other men before, and you need some time to decide to take this step. There is nothing strange or wild about this - for virgin girls such behavior is quite expected.
You don't want to be distracted
If you have already had sex, but now you don’t want to get closer, then you can tell the guy that you are immersed in thoughts about something else (problems at work, family troubles), and you don’t want him to get involved because of your distraction. these questions ruined your intimate evening. Admit that you are in a very bad mood, and this is not the best moment to give each other tenderness, but you want everything to be “on top.”
When and how to refuse: general rules
The ability to refuse a man a meeting and not only in a polite form is not given to everyone and is extremely rare. For men and women, the topic of refusal is considered intimate and sensitive, since the reasons for refusal are different. One way or another, everyone in this life has to learn this lesson. It is important to learn to say “no” tactfully and painlessly.
Psychologists advise stopping acquaintances or relationships that are undesirable for a girl at the initial stage, otherwise, a showdown with a young admirer inspired by hopes will take place in a more heated atmosphere.
The most successful phrases for refusal in a comic form
If you want to add a little humor to your refusal, there are a few tricks you can take note of. As you know, many young people are wary of overly religious girls, and you can play on this! If a guy asks you out on a date, you can say, “That's a good idea, but I usually spend all my free time at our religious community, so I suggest we meet there. Moreover, we need new participants! Call me when you decide!” In this case, you can leave a “fake” phone number.
You can also answer this way: “I have four children, and I have no one to leave them with, so choose a place for a date that will be interesting for my children too!”
If, after such statements, a young man still calls you, then it makes sense to look at him with a new eye - perhaps he is still worthy of attention?
How to politely and gracefully refuse a guy without offending him
Good afternoon, dear readers, or rather female readers. If you are wondering how to refuse a guy without offending him, then you have a kind heart and a pure soul. I consider it my duty to help such good people, so I will be happy to tell you how to correctly and beautifully refuse men a date, communication, or sex.
Unfortunately, we do not always choose those who choose us. You need to handle someone else's sympathy delicately and gently, because someday you too may find yourself in the role of a girl who is not mutually in love and be rejected. Especially for you, I have prepared methods, techniques and phrases for refusal, using which you will not be tormented by feelings of guilt.
How to stop talking to a guy
First of all, you need to tune in to the conversation. Psychologists recommend presenting refusal in a polite manner, avoiding rude and degrading phrases, as well as gentleness similar to coquetry. It is much easier to ignore a stranger than to cut off contact with someone you know. How to politely refuse to communicate with a man without experiencing moral discomfort?
- When refusing, be kind. If a guy has strong feelings, he may begin to threaten, insult, or even blackmail the girl he is in love with. Do not get into a quarrel, try to wait for the love flame to die down.
- Show determination. You shouldn't communicate out of pity. Firmly say that continuing the relationship is impossible.
- How to refuse a guy gracefully? Use humorous phrases. They will defuse the situation and lift your spirits even in such an unpleasant situation.
How to refuse a person without offending him if he is a stranger who decides to win your heart in the middle of the street? The following phrases work effectively:
- You are so cute, but I prefer brunettes (blond, bald, brown-haired).
- Sorry, I don't make acquaintances on the street. This is my life principle.
- I’d love to go on a date with you, I just need to arrange a nanny for my children.
- I would like to get to know you better, but I am married and love my husband.
- I already turned down the guy on the other side of the street, now it’s your turn.
Be persistent and consistent in refusing. A girl who refused a man should look like an impregnable fortress. In her phrases and intonation there should not be the slightest hint of a different turn of events.
Why is it difficult for us to refuse?
Let's figure out why rejections are sometimes so difficult for us. I will list the main reasons and give recommendations on how to deal with them.
- Bad boundaries
Personal boundaries for most people are a vague and uncertain concept. To explain it in simple terms, the boundaries go where a person’s sphere of influence ends. Anything outside of your control is not your territory.
How does this relate to refusals, you ask? I'll explain. You can freely manage your body, your time and attention, so refusing a man you don’t like is entirely within your boundaries. But his reaction to refusal is outside your boundaries - he may be offended, angry and stop communicating with you if you were friends, and you cannot do anything about it.
Many girls are so afraid of being in opposition with someone that they try in every possible way to soften their refusal, which only worsens the situation. The man gets the impression that he is simply being fooled, and he quite naturally begins to get angry.
The good news is that it is through refusals that you can train your boundaries to an ideal state. The next time you have to refuse someone, do it firmly and confidently and allow the person to respond however they want.
Hyperresponsibility is one of the main symptoms of neuroticism. It mainly affects infantile, self-centered individuals. This property manifests itself in the fact that a person takes on too much and ascribes to himself opportunities and abilities that he does not have.
If, during a proposal from someone you don't like, you start to feel guilty, you are prone to hyper-responsibility.
At a key moment, thoughts begin to flash in your head that you somehow looked at the man wrong, did something wrong, and gave him false hope. You start fawning over something, making excuses, obscuring things. It looks, to put it mildly, ugly.
What to do about it? Realize that the other person is the same subject as you, who has his own will and is responsible for his actions. His feelings are not the result of any of your actions, and you should not be held responsible for them. At first it can be difficult to give up the idea that you control the universe, but then life becomes much more pleasant and easier.
- Fear of his reaction
Are there any cowards here, admit it? You should not be ashamed of this feeling, it is responsible for safety and is the basis of the instinct of self-preservation. Women, with rare exceptions, are physically weaker than men, so the fear of possible aggression from a rejected admirer is in some cases completely justified. Learn to recognize these cases and you will no longer have to be afraid.
If a man himself is hot and impulsive, you should be careful with him. Do not refuse him in a rude and humiliating manner. Try not to be alone with such a person, especially if you do not intend to enter into any relationship with him. The same recommendations apply to tipsy young people.
Many women are afraid that a man will not survive their refusal - he will drink himself in grief or commit suicide. Such fears are definitely unfounded. If you catch yourself thinking such thoughts, urgently turn on self-irony and stop considering yourself a fairy-tale princess.
How to refuse a stranger
If you are often pestered with offers to get acquainted, rejoice, everything is in order with your appearance. But if unfamiliar men immediately offer you sex, you urgently need to reconsider your image. Perhaps your clothes are too provocative and your makeup is vulgar. In this case, polite refusals will not help.
I still hope that your case is not so hopeless, so I will share tips on how to refuse to meet a guy without offending him or losing face.
You always need to refuse firmly and categorically, unless, of course, your refusal is not coquetry or a desire to increase your worth. Having voiced your decisive “no,” you should not then engage in discussions and include an excuse. If a man asks leading questions and tries with all his might to engage you in conversation, just don’t answer. Don’t be afraid to seem too harsh - he’s not afraid to be intrusive, storming your personal space.
Never apologize for refusing an acquaintance - you have done nothing wrong.
Some girls are not able to withstand the onslaught of very persistent guys. They can leave the wrong phone number or, leaving theirs, then not answer calls. Honestly, it’s not the best way, but you shouldn’t beat yourself up too much for it. After all, the man himself is to blame for invading your borders with such disrespect.
To make it easier for you, I will give examples of ready-made phrases for refusing strangers.
- “I’m in a hurry and can’t talk.”
- “I would love to meet you, but I’m afraid my husband won’t like it.”
- “I’m not in the mood for dating.”
- “I don’t like meeting people on the street.”
If you received an offer to meet someone on the Internet, on VK, for example, or another social network, the best way to refuse is silence. Don’t answer the guy, and if he continues to bombard your DM with messages, feel free to blacklist him.
How to refuse a friend or acquaintance
If you can’t stand on ceremony with strangers, then when refusing a friend, you need to weigh every word. His sympathy is much deeper and is based not only on your external attractiveness, so rejection can hurt him more. Be prepared for the fact that after such a delicate situation he decides to stop communicating with you. In this case, you will have to respect his decision and step aside.
If a guy asks you to start dating, it's best to say that your heart is occupied by another man. Such an answer, as a rule, does not raise questions and leaves no chance for false hope.
You can thank the person and say that you are very pleased with his attention. Still, someone else's sympathy, even non-reciprocal, greatly raises self-esteem.
You should not point out to the applicant for your sympathy his shortcomings, weaknesses, or flaws in behavior. By doing this you will humiliate him and cause mental trauma. And especially gifted comrades may begin to argue, prove and try to adapt to your tastes.
Remember that pity is disrespect for a person, so do not try to console or cheer up your friend. Give him the opportunity to get out of this awkward situation gracefully. It’s best to laugh it off and move the conversation in a neutral direction.
Knowing the characteristics of a person, you can choose the best strategy for refusal.
If a dreamy and sensitive guy decides to ask you out on a date, be sure that his feelings are serious. He probably dreamed about you before and couldn’t make up his mind for a long time. Be delicate, polite and cultured with him. Use one of the following phrases if you can’t think of one yourself.
- “I’m very flattered by your proposal, but I’m already in love with someone else.”
- “I love you as a friend, but nothing more can happen between us.”
- “This is very unexpected... But, unfortunately, I cannot reciprocate your feelings, I already have a boyfriend.”
Provided that you refuse gently and the guy’s sympathy for you has not yet turned into a serious feeling, you have a chance to maintain your friendship and continue to communicate as if nothing had happened.
It's easiest to turn off a womanizer. They make proposals to girls on a regular basis, so it’s difficult to offend them with a refusal. You can limit yourself to a laconic “no,” but if he asks for an explanation, you can laugh it off as follows.
- “Thank you for the offer, but I have to refuse. I don’t want to be another trophy in your collection.”
- “Are you offering this to all your friends? How sweet, at least I’m not last on the list?”
Womanizers are cheerful and easy-going guys, so he is unlikely to be offended by you.
There is a category of men who are not stopped by the second, tenth, or fiftieth refusal. Obsession is their second nature. Such types can seriously spoil the mood, so you need to refuse them firmly and categorically. Don’t be afraid of ruining your relationship; sooner or later he’ll get you so bad that you’ll have to give up your friendship.
To the verbal refusal it is worth adding complete ignorance and avoidance of the sticky man. This way he will quickly come unstuck from you and stick to someone else.
And even if this does not help, you will have to use heavy artillery. Ask a large and muscular acquaintance to portray your boyfriend in front of an obsessive gentleman. You can even arrange a serious man-to-man conversation with them face to face.
For more ways to refuse, watch this video.
Advice from psychologists for girls: how to refuse?
The boy should take a walk
How to gently refuse a boy's offer to go for a walk ? The easiest way would be to refer to business and concerns, firmly and politely refusing the meeting.
And if the guy continues to persuade you to set aside half an hour for a date, it is better to interrupt the conversation (by informing him that it is time to do the previously mentioned tasks).
It is important not to flirt with the guy, not to take the initiative. This will not help mitigate the rejection. Such behavior will only make the guy think that you are interested in him.
For a guy to meet
How to politely refuse to date a guy or a man without offending him?
Delaying refusal and avoiding a sensitive topic means giving false hope to a person in love.
It’s better to deal with this issue right away so as not to torment the fan with your deathly silence or feigned doubts.
The guy must understand that your refusal is a firm and deliberate decision, and not an attempt to increase his worth . Therefore, you need to openly voice your refusal in a personal meeting, while avoiding witnesses.
If the guy is a significant figure in your life (friend, colleague, good acquaintance, sports teammate, etc.), then you should honestly admit the reasons for the refusal.
Not ready for a relationship? Have you been secretly in love with someone else for a long time? Do you want to concentrate on your studies or career? Do you see him as just a friend? Any reason has a right to exist . And an adequate guy will accept her with dignity.
Well, if the person is not so important and close, or is trying too hard to achieve a positive answer, you can slightly embellish the situation. It is enough to inform the young man that you already have a man or husband so that he stops trying to win your heart.
Speak seriously, but do not try to offend the person. You should not criticize his appearance, character, style of courtship, etc. You should also avoid offensive or swear words.
For a married man
How to tactfully refuse a married man?
Immediately give up the idea of hinting or openly telling a married man that you can report his “adventures” to his wife. This can provoke aggression.
In this situation, you can only refer to your own moral principles . State directly that you cannot date a married man.
If a man is too persistent, you can tell him that you are not interested in a relationship for pleasure. The main goal for this period is to find a candidate to start a family and have children.
In such cases, “married people” quickly withdraw themselves, as they are in search of a sexual partner, and not a life partner.
What phrases are suitable for refusal?
A polite refusal should include a passing positive comment (about the guy or his attempts to please you) and a good reason for the refusal .
At the same time, the reason for the refusal should not be “tied” to the guy and his personal qualities/characteristics. Otherwise it will sound very rude.
Templates of polite phrases for refusal:
- “I really appreciate your efforts, but at the moment I’m not ready for a relationship and want to focus on my career,”
- “You are a wonderful man, but I love another person and cannot reciprocate your feelings,”
- “I value communication with you, but I don’t feel love or infatuation,”
- “I appreciate your efforts, but I don’t see us as a couple, since we are completely different people,”
- “I am now going through a rather difficult and eventful period of life. I’m pleased to know that you like me, but I don’t want to start a romantic relationship at all and plan to devote all my free time to business.”
How to be convincing if the gentleman is too persistent?
There is no need to actively make contact. Attempts to convince a person of the absence of feelings, to reason with him and persuade him to leave you alone can look like flirting .
A guy in love, blinded by feelings, will be confident that your answers (even with an obvious negative connotation) are a reflection of his chance to win .
Be specific. Perhaps you formulated the refusal not entirely clearly. Not wanting to go to a movie together is not an indicator of your indifference.
Try to convey your position to the guy. He must understand that his candidacy is not considered as a lover, and further attempts/pursuits will not yield positive results.
If, in his desire to gain favor, a fan crosses acceptable boundaries , you must inform your parents/friends/relevant authorities about this. After all, inappropriate behavior can result in some dangerous actions.
How to tell a man off politely without offending him? 5 working ways:
How to refuse intimacy from a guy
Every girl should be able to beautifully and gracefully deny men access to her body. Sex with you should be the prerogative of a man who loves and loves you; you should not waste your time on casual relationships.
If a man directly and unequivocally persuades you to have an intimate relationship, think about whether you have gone too far with flirting. In the future, be more restrained in communicating with him, but for now refuse in a polite and gentle manner, apologize if you gave him a reason to think that his desire is mutual. But only if there really were signals of this kind on your part.
If a married man pesters you with obscene proposals, your “no” should be categorical and laconic. Under no circumstances should you lecture him, appeal to morality, or smile sarcastically. When refusing, there is no need to mention your wife and children, this can provoke aggression.
How to refuse a man so that he wants it even more
At the initial stage of a relationship, many girls want to postpone sex and do the right thing. A man is a hunter by nature, and the more effort he spends on conquering his “prey,” the more value it will acquire in his eyes.
But how can you refuse intimacy to a guy without offending him or discouraging him from continuing his relationship with you? Here you need to act very cunningly and subtly.
It's rare that a guy invites his new lover to make love directly. Usually this is veiled and ambiguous. He may invite you to visit after a walk, for example, with a hint of a pleasant time in bed.
If you are not ready for this yet, it is better to refuse, even if you are terribly interested in seeing how the guy lives. Refer to important matters, an unfed kitten, pain in the leg, etc.
The most elegant way to refuse an invitation to visit is to say that you already have too many impressions for today, and you are afraid to completely lose your head. If there were kisses and caresses before this, your words will greatly warm up the man.
The main rule is to refuse only what is offered to you. If a guy invites you to his home, there is no need to squeal that you are “not like that” and don’t have sex on first dates. He will naturally say that he didn’t think of anything like that, and he will also jokingly notice how preoccupied you are and think about only one thing.
And remember - a man must see your sympathy and passion and understand that you are refusing because you don’t know him well and are not yet sure of him. He should not get the impression that you are a frostbitten, frigid herring who is only interested in someone else's wallet. Take care of this, and then success is guaranteed to you.
Why do you have to refuse? Reasons for non-reciprocity
Before we talk about how to refuse to date a guy, let's look at why mutual feelings sometimes don't arise. The reasons may be as follows:
- You already have a boyfriend or husband. Everything is clear here - you love your chosen one and are not going to change him for another admirer.
- You don't like the guy who's proposing a relationship. It is difficult to build love without reciprocity. You can take a closer look at the candidate for life partner, but if no emotions arise towards him, it is better to refuse and not waste either your time or his.
- The guy behaves unworthily - he can easily be rude and rude. A relationship with such a “macho” is out of the question.
- All his feelings are only in words. He promises mountains of gold, but in reality he only talks. You would like actions, without them you are not ready to date.
- You suspect that he is only offering to date him to get you into bed faster.
Any of these situations is a sufficient reason to refuse.
Important! You should not think that by refusing, you are offending or hurting the person. On the contrary, you save his time, which he can spend searching for mutual love. And you save yourself from obsessive advances.
