How to raise a child at 2-3 years old: features, psychology, recommendations of a psychologist

The older a child gets, the less he begins to need self-care. After 2 years, children are much more independent, as they master an increasing number of skills (in particular, self-service), can communicate their needs using speech, become even more active and act more confidently.

But this does not mean that the baby requires less attention. Quite the contrary. You need to monitor him even more carefully and make even more efforts to develop the child’s personality and direct his energy in the right direction. That is why the question of how to raise a child of 2-3 years old is acute for most parents and stimulates them to study the characteristics of this age and find the best ways to interact with their baby.

Features of the development of children at 2-3 years old

After 2 years, most children noticeably improve their speech, their vocabulary grows, and they begin to construct simple sentences of 2-3 words.
At this age, children almost completely master self-care skills: they go to the potty on their own, wash their hands, eat carefully with a spoon, drink from a mug, and can get dressed and undressed.
Breastfeeding goes away completely, the child eats adult food and shows his culinary preferences even more clearly.
Most children start going to kindergarten at 2-3 years old. The most favorable period for starting a visit is considered to be when the child reaches the age of 3 years, when the connection with the mother gradually begins to weaken and the desire to communicate with peers appears. Adaptation to kindergarten in this case is less painful.
The child actively explores the boundaries of what is permitted, learns the rules of behavior and tests the parents’ strength. Surely you have noticed that your child has already learned to “cunning”, observes the reaction of adults to his actions, and can behave completely differently with mom, dad, grandmother and other relatives.
The baby continues to manipulate objects even more actively, his actions become more accurate, and coordination of movements improves.
By the age of two, a child knows the actions of people, animals, the purpose of objects, for example, that “a bird flies”, “a car drives”, “they wash their hands with soap”, etc.
Babies at this age are very excitable. But it can sometimes be very difficult to calm them down.
Imitating adults becomes the main way to learn various skills.
The baby’s desire for independence intensifies, because he already knows so many things! More and more often you can hear from him the phrase: “I do it myself!”, when once again you want to help him with something. Therefore, it is important to build the upbringing of a child aged 2-3 years on providing him with the opportunity to choose, encouraging initiative and physical activity.
Many children aged 2-3 years show a penchant for one or another type of activity: drawing, modeling from plasticine, assembling construction sets, role-playing games, etc. Of course, these cannot yet be called stable interests, but certain personality traits of the child can already appear during these activities.
The imagination is actively developing, the baby fantasizes. This is usually noticeable in his speech, acting, and drawings.
The range of expressed emotions expands significantly. A child can demonstrate joy, delight, surprise, affection, embarrassment, pity, disappointment, anger, fear, sympathy, etc.
After 2 years of age, interest in peers appears; the baby wants to communicate, play, and make friends with other children. At the same time, interaction with adults also remains significant for him.

If you want to raise a child, start with YOURSELF!

I’ll say right away that ensuring a decent upbringing of a child is a huge painstaking process that must be carried out, adhering to certain rules:

It is important to control and monitor your behavior. If you watch TV and tell your child that you can’t watch TV, then don’t expect obedience. The toddler is at such an age that he wants to perform the actions that you perform, and if you ask him to do something, then most likely he will resist. For example, you ask him to calm down and stand still, but, as luck would have it, he will circle around without stopping. In this case, I recommend telling him: “Run faster!” I give 90% that he will be very surprised, stop and decide to take a break!

Remember that when raising a child, you need to show restraint and patience in order to adequately respond to the manifestation of his leadership, creative and hyperactive qualities. After all, children are small individuals with different temperaments, abilities, inclinations, etc. For example, if a toddler is a leader by nature and constantly expresses his opinion, puts forward ideas and suggestions, then do not judge him, be sure to listen and give him freedom of choice in some things. Thus, the baby will grow up to be a confident person, a leader whose opinion others will listen to.

By the way, if your child draws everywhere: on walls, wallpaper, furniture, and also willingly does modeling, loves to play with construction sets, enjoys making appliques, etc., then your child is a person with enormous creative potential.

In this case, I recommend that parents provide the appropriate space, necessary materials and items for the development of his talent. After my daughter painted the sofa, I realized that I urgently needed to buy a drawing board, whatman paper, pencils, craft kits, etc.

Don’t be upset if your child behaves like a monkey: jumping on the sofa or bed, climbing any heights, constantly turning and spinning, not sitting in one place. Just your little one from among the hyperactive children.

Don't scold your child for this, but just find something for him to do that uses his physical abilities. This could be a visit to the children's playground, outdoor games and much more.

There are categories of guys who are called tireless helpers. Such children are obedient, always walk near their mother and try to help her in feeding pets, cleaning, arranging dishes, etc.

Don’t discourage him, interest the little one, ask him to perform one or another task that is feasible for him. Thus, from childhood he will be accustomed to hard work and will grow up to be your excellent assistant. — teach your child the rules of etiquette, hygiene and self-care.

By the age of two, the child should know that when meeting, he needs to say hello, when leaving, to say goodbye, to apologize in time, and also not to forget to say words of gratitude. The sooner you start teaching your little one the golden rules of etiquette, the better! No one except mom will explain to the little one that he needs to wash his hands, bathe, wash his face and brush his teeth. This is not always easy to do, but you need to be patient and clearly and intelligibly explain why this needs to be done. Set certain rules that you should never deviate from! For example, a child should put away his toys, eat at the dining table, fall asleep on his crib, etc. Another difficult task will be to teach your baby to put on things on his own. I warn you right away that this is quite difficult to do! The toddler needs to be clearly explained and shown how to put things on correctly, distinguish between where the back is and where the front is, how to fasten and unfasten things with Velcro. It often happens that a child is afraid to wear things with a narrow neck: a T-shirt, turtleneck, sweater. Explain to him in a joking manner that wearing these things is not at all scary. To do this, spread the neck, with a smile on your face, stick your head into it and say: “Ku-ku!” You should not teach a two-year-old child to tie shoelaces or fasten buttons and zippers on clothes. You will do this when the little one grows up a little and turns 3-4 years old.

Psychology of boys and girls at 2-3 years old: are there any differences?

At this age, children can distinguish between boys and girls by external signs: by clothing and behavior.

The differences appear at the level of trends. For example, it cannot be said that all girls develop speech faster than boys. But still, more often than not, girls master speech before boys.
Boys develop visual-spatial abilities faster.
In most cases, boys get used to the potty later.
Boys develop gross motor skills faster, girls develop fine motor skills.

Psychological characteristics of children aged 8-9 years

At this age, the child’s self-awareness is strengthened and his own point of view on surrounding objects and phenomena is formed. He can express his thoughts on what he wants to become in the future.
A junior schoolchild is able to think critically about the behavior of adults, including his parents. He begins to compare information received from different sources (from parents, teachers, peers, from the media), may doubt the truth of the position of adults, and draws his own conclusions.
At the age of 8-9 years, the child is less drawn to his parents and more eager to communicate with peers. His need for friendship and collective activity intensifies.
Approval and praise from adults are still important to him. In this case, specifics and assessment of the child’s individual abilities are important.
Most often, at this age, children already have a hobby: they go to clubs, sports clubs, a music school or dance studios.
Most students aged 8 have already managed to adapt to school, but fatigue still sets in quite quickly, and a high need for rest remains.
Children have already mastered many social norms well, observe the rules of politeness, and can control their behavior in class and in public places.

Crisis of 2-3 years: why does it occur and how to overcome it?

The emergence of a crisis is associated with several factors:

The child reaches a significant level of development and masters a large number of skills, which allows him to feel largely independent. Therefore, the baby resists any attempts by adults to limit his freedom and activity.
The child’s personality, his character, and awareness of his “I” are being formed. It is important for him to express his preferences, he strives to clearly define the position of “mine”, he is jealous of his things, toys, etc.

Characteristic features in a child’s behavior that indicate a crisis:

Stubbornness: the baby demands something and continues to insist on his own for a long time, following the original decision.
Resistance to requests, instructions, decisions of adults; protest.
The desire for independence.
Frequent whims and hysterics.
Manifestation of despotism.

How to overcome the crisis?

First of all, take it for granted that the child is in crisis and arm yourself with knowledge about child psychology and development during this period.
Ensure the principle: exercise maximum patience. When raising a child after 2 years, you will need even more.
Take your baby’s resistance and refusals as training to express your opinion. It just so happens that the child must first “work out” different techniques and methods of behavior with his parents and only then transfer them to society. If he is not given this opportunity, then in the future he may have problems adapting to society.
Do not try to “break” and harshly suppress the child’s protest and expression of anger. This will only increase the distance between you and undermine his trust in you. Try to “guide gently” and calmly defend your position.
Instead of “you can’t”, say more often how you should act and behave.
Don't yell or use physical punishment. If a child behaves aggressively, let him understand with the help of his facial expressions and intonation that you are unpleasant and he is doing something bad.
Allow him to act independently where possible. Be there, guide, support.

Tips for parents

This is a characteristic of the general age characteristics of children 3–4 years old. The main thing for parents during this period is not to lose the child’s trust, not to become his enemy, not to break him as a person.

To avoid serious problems at this stage, use the following tips.

Encourage your baby's independence. Praise your skills and help them acquire new skills. Suggest an alternative solution if the child cannot cope with the task in the intended way.
Establish equality in communication with the baby. He should not feel that you are the commander and boss, and he is an inept and helpless subordinate.
Support your child's positive initiative and praise it.
Form in your child the feeling that he is good, regardless of whether he commits offenses or not.
Enter the limits of what is permitted. The child must clearly understand that he has the right to make his own decision, what it applies to, and where the generally established rule will apply. For example: you can choose which toy to swim with, but swimming is a must. It’s up to you to choose which hat we’ll wear for a walk, but walking is necessary.
Establish a system of reasonable prohibitions. They must be aimed at ensuring the health and safety of the child. And the baby must understand that the ban is justified. Give reasons why you can’t walk without a hat, eat ice cream in the cold, cross the road at a red light, or grab a hot kettle. Everything else should be discussed.
Do not try to punish with shouting or spanking, or establish prohibitions out of spite or revenge. This will only break the child’s psyche “under you”, making him weak-willed, insecure and notorious in the future.

It's not easy with children at any age. Difficulties, crises, disagreements are inevitable

It is important to come out of them at a new level, giving to the child, not taking away. Not losing the trust and respect of your child is a difficult but understandable science

Tips for raising children at 2-3 years old

Objectives of raising and educating children:

favorably overcome the age crisis;
maintain a middle ground between prohibitions and excessive freedom of action;
develop creative abilities;
promote speech development;
help actively learn the norms and rules of behavior in society;
develop the emotional sphere, allow you to openly express your feelings;
instill responsiveness to people, friendliness;
encourage initiative and the desire to be independent.

Why does a crisis occur at 5 years?

With normal development, by the age of five, the baby is no longer poorly spoken and is able to talk about his needs. The child really wants to appear big, to be like adults. You can often see him spying on or eavesdropping on their conversations; he is also interested in being among his peers.

The brain is already sufficiently developed, and the baby is able to control his emotions. He understands that boys and girls are different. At this age, it is common for a child to show imagination and have his own opinion about the world around him. This period is characterized by the most vivid manifestation of character traits.

Children are interested in everything that happens around them, they can even tell fictional stories

At the age of 5, communication with other children is important for a child, but he does not always achieve this, which is why he may find himself alone. Sometimes he just doesn't have the opportunity to talk to someone about it. All this can cause a crisis in which the child becomes too capricious and hysterical

In order for the child not to withdraw into himself and easily survive the crisis, he must be in comfortable conditions and always feel the support of adults

All this can cause a crisis in which the child becomes too capricious and hysterical. In order for the child not to withdraw into himself and easily survive the crisis, he must be in comfortable conditions and always feel the support of adults.

READ IN DETAIL: capricious child

Be patient, because everything is in your power. You should not immediately seek help from a psychologist or other specialist. Otherwise, the child may become even more frightened because of strangers.

How to raise a child after 2 years

The main example for a child is you. He observes your behavior, copies it, reflects your emotional state, and is sometimes in the same mood as you. Therefore, first you need to educate yourself, and only then - the child.
Praise your child for his skills and correct behavior.
Take all your child’s problems and fears seriously, even if it seems to you that they are “well, completely trivial.” For your baby, everything that worries him is important. Let him speak, listen carefully, be there and support him.
Play actively with your baby, give different characters characteristics. With the help of play, the child better learns how to behave.
Use fairy tales (including those you make up yourself) to more effectively influence a child: form the right attitudes, norms of behavior, and help cope with fears.
Be interested in your baby’s preferences: “What is your favorite color?”, “What do you like to play?”, “What animals do you like?”
Allow your child to express his feelings, name them to help him learn to understand them. For example: “You’re angry” or “The girl is crying, you feel sorry for her, right?”
While watching cartoons or reading books, comment on the behavior of the characters, discuss with your child which of them did well and which did poorly. Ask the baby how they feel, which one he likes.
Encourage your child to get to know other children: regularly go to playgrounds and visit others. Talk to your child about friendship and helping others. Usually a visit to a special children's center, where the child is at the same time with his mother and interacts with peers, has a good effect on development.
Actively involve your child in joint activities, give simple tasks, encourage his desire to help you.
Be flexible and try to see behind any disobedience and protest the true reasons for such behavior in order to gently correct it.
Always use affection and words to let your child understand that you love him, no matter how he behaves.

No matter how difficult and responsible it may seem to raise a child at 2-3 years old, this process is, at the same time, interesting and conducive to the development of the parents themselves. Love for your baby and the ability to choose the right behavior towards him will create the basis for transformation from a rebel into your assistant and an independent initiative person.

Recommendations for parents on education

Parents should clearly understand what the baby needs and try to create conditions in which he will feel comfortable. When raising a child, it is wrong to go to extremes: allow permissiveness or intensely care for the baby

We will highlight the key points that parents of children of this age need to take into account:

Raising a child at 2 years old implies all kinds of encouragement for independence, praise for every new achievement (see also: what should a child of 2 and a half years be able to do with proper development?).
Show your attitude towards his efforts, make it clear that mom and dad care about the result.
Do not seize the initiative and do not finish what the child started if he was unable to do it himself. It is better to simplify the conditions of the task, give advice for solving it, and encourage you to do it again.

Mom and dad should not laugh or joke if the baby doesn’t succeed in something.
Be patient, remember that it takes time for the baby to learn any action.
Do not scold the baby, nervously pulling him back if he could not do something carefully, or if he broke a toy, trying to understand how it works.
Demonstrate trust and confidence that he will cope with the task.

Competently raising a child aged 2-3 years is constant encouragement, stimulation to overcome difficulties, preparation for the fact that not everything comes easy

It is very important to develop a child’s faith in his own abilities. For example, if he couldn’t do something, calm him down, tell him what will happen next time. In this case, it will be psychologically easier for the baby to cope with the task.

In this case, it will be psychologically easier for the baby to cope with the task.

Each child is an individual with his own interests and desires, and a vision of the world. The parents’ task is not to reject his worldview, destroying his mental health, not to force him to meet his own standards, but to support in every possible way the desire for self-expression and independence. It is necessary to direct the child’s interest in the right direction, and strive to arrange it so that he learns to make decisions himself, as well as bear responsibility for them. Patience and a positive attitude will help mom, dad and baby get through a difficult but very interesting period called the “3rd year crisis.”

READ ALSO: 3-year-old crisis in children: consultation on overcoming

https://youtube.com/watch?v=hBqgIO0If-s

Activities that promote speech development

At 2 years old, not all babies can talk. But if they respond to requests, make eye contact when talking, and can comply with parental requests, this is not a cause for concern. They will talk - everything has its time. To speed up this process, it is important to read to them and sing understandable songs. Intellectual development will also be supported by fine motor skills training.

Physical development also plays a role in the formation of speech. It is important to combine fine motor skills activities with active activities. A sorter toy useful for children's development. During the game, name the figure, allow the baby to feel its outline, and help insert it into the hole intended for it.

According to the psychology of a 2.5-year-old child, specific games such as pouring objects or pouring water from one container to another cannot be prohibited. But it is important to create conditions that are convenient for everyone (in particular, choose a place for the game that is easy to clean up later). Activities such as modeling, cutting, and shaping from plasticine will support your baby’s development.

2 year old crisis

The opinion of psychologists is clear, it is completely why your sweet baby turns into a tough manipulator. It is in the period from one and a half to two years that the child involuntarily changes and begins to feel more mature, as he already understands some things for the first time after birth. He wants to know everything, but not by asking mom or dad, but on his own. Parents cannot allow their child to take such a step, and he will test their strength. The child throws tantrums and is capricious, cries and does not obey, because only in this way does he learn boundaries, explore possibilities and set priorities, and explore boundaries. Through scandals, the child tries to understand what limits cannot be crossed, what is generally acceptable and what is not, and only you can help.

It’s interesting, but all this will help shape your personality, character, and life positions. Frameworks are needed, set them right away to give the child a clear idea of adult life, in a language acceptable to him. It is boundaries and support that will give the baby the opportunity to feel safe.

Don’t resist growing up, don’t indulge, but don’t deprive your child of the opportunity to turn to you in difficult times. Scold and prohibit as you see fit, but don’t protect it too much. The baby must overcome the resistance and obstacles that life poses on his own. Remember, if you have set a rule, you cannot give in under any circumstances. Rules are rules, and breaking them is fraught with punishment or a stern conversation, which will be more effective than a slap on the butt or a cruel scream.

Understand that a little person, by the way, just like an adult, will always look for a way to get what he wants. This is a good character trait - persistence in achieving a goal. Depending on the development of the mind, the methods may be different.

Your task is to cool down the ardor of a child at 2 years old, that is, to make him understand that he will not achieve his goal by making a scandal and stamping his feet. Then the baby will begin to look for another method of influencing others, and when he finds an effective one, he will conclude that it is correct.

So let this method of getting what you want be conversation. Show your child that with ordinary speech and requests, discussion of the situation, you can get what you want.

Difficulties of age

2-3 years is a rather difficult period for both parents and children.

At this time, children reject the help of adults and strive to do everything themselves. At the same time, they get very angry and irritated if something doesn’t work out for them. The so-called “3-year crisis” is approaching, when it is very important for a child to defend his independence, his desires, in order to declare himself as a person separate from his mother.

Children become stubborn and capricious, and at the slightest provocation they can start hysterics. Some even show aggression...

Any two-year-old baby wants independence: he needs to be treated like an adult. Often he puts forward his “demands” to his parents and stubbornly insists on their fulfillment. If an adult does not take them into account, then most likely he will face hysterics on the part of the child.

Therefore, parents now need to remain calm and find compromises. For example, if a two-year-old child needs to go down the freight elevator, and not the passenger elevator, and the parents are in a hurry at that time, they will have to negotiate. For example, now take the passenger one, and on the way back wait for exactly the elevator that the baby “needs”.

At the same time, two-year-old children are very active, inquisitive and restless. They want to touch everything, get to everything. And this is often dangerous and requires prohibitions from parents. Which, in turn, again, provokes a “rebellion” in the child.

It is very important to remember that whims and hysterics at 2-3 years old are not depravity or bad character. A child does not know how to “do things out of spite” at this age. In this way he develops his strong-willed qualities.