What to do if a child bites his nails. reasons and advice from a psychologist

02/09/2021 Reading time: 3 min 861 0

Curling your hair around your finger, eating stress with chocolate, smoking, excessive use of swear words and a host of other examples are all habits of adults that almost no one pays attention to anymore. It’s a different matter if a four-year-old child sucks a pacifier or finger: here the public cannot resist the opportunity to reprimand both the child and the parents. Although, if you look at both children and adults, the essence of bad habits is the same.

Why does a child bite his fingernails?

Onychophagia is said to occur if a child constantly bites his nails. If you notice this only a couple of times, it's an accident, not a bad habit. With onychophagia, children do not control and are not aware of their actions. Therefore, you need help and understand how to wean it off. As a rule, a child begins to bite his nails at 3 years of age. At 2 years of age or earlier, onychophagia also occurs, but much less frequently. It is most common among preschoolers, primary schoolchildren and teenagers. And after 18 years she disappears. But there are cases where, from childhood, a habit passes into adulthood and persists forever. According to statistics, onychophagia is present in 30% of children 7–10 years old and in 45% of children 11–16 years old experiencing puberty. The reasons are related to age. Let's take a closer look at some of them.

Why does onychophagia occur in babies?

The development of bad habits in young children is facilitated by cognitive activity. In an effort to get to know the world around them, they are constantly trying to put something in their mouth, lick it, suck it, and taste it. Toys, food, garbage from the floor, furniture, books come to hand. But sometimes my own fingers.

However, in children, the habit is also associated with a genetic predisposition. Studies have shown that in 30% of cases with onychophagia in a child, mother, father, grandparents also do this and thereby set the wrong example for the child. Twins clearly confirm this: two children almost always bite their nails, not just one.

Psychological factors

Onychophagia is provoked by mental or emotional overload, which indicates internal anxiety.

Anything can cause this concern:

• lagging behind friends in outdoor games;
• excessive demands and expectations of parents or teachers;
• fear of being punished for this or that action;
• family dysfunction;
• difficulties with communication in a team, resentment, humiliation;
• period of adaptation to kindergarten or school;
• moving to another city, changing team;
• loss of a loved one;
• parental divorce;
• upcoming exams, performances, concerts or other important events for the child.

If the reason is emotional experiences, you need to find out and deal with what caused them. The bad obsessive habit in this case is secondary. This is an unconscious, normal reaction to stress. To get rid of it, you need to work with the reasons. Show patience, love and care. Maybe the child is too impressionable, he needs more time to survive traumatic events.

"Nervous" habits

People say that onychophagia is a “nervous” habit that needs to be treated.

Such habits in children also include:

• gnawing on the caps of pens and pencils;
• pulling out or twirling hair on the finger;
• grinding or chattering of teeth;
• skin picking;
• thumb sucking;
• nose picking and others.

Of these, the habit of biting nails, which occurs mainly in nervous and energetic children, is considered the most difficult in terms of addiction and more often than others persists in adults.

In fact, in medicine there is no concept of “nervous habit”, but there is the concept of “obsessive-compulsive disorder” or OCD for short. Obsessions are obsessive thoughts, and compulsions are compulsive actions. OCD is a repetitive behavior triggered by obsessive thoughts that compel you to perform certain actions to relieve emotional distress. If you ask a child why he does this, there will be no clear answer. Characteristic signs of OCD include the timing and frequency of obsessive behavior. If they take an hour or more during the day, then there is a disorder. The risk of developing OCD is higher in children whose parents instill perfectionism in them.

In addition to obsessive actions, nervousness is caused by a lack of B vitamins, which are important for the smooth functioning of the nervous system. To eliminate such a deficiency, review the child’s diet. Add more meat, fish, herbs, dairy products, nuts, or take vitamin complexes prescribed by your doctor.

Other factors

For reasons not related to emotional experiences or OCD, the following can provoke onychophagia:

• Untidy condition of the cuticle. If the skin is very puffy and clinging, it is possible that the child will try to figure it out on his own, without waiting for parental help;
• Search for satisfaction. If parents refuse sweets and tasty treats, the child replaces them with finger sucking or nail biting;
• Hunger. Sometimes children bite off pieces of their nails when they are hungry. This helps them distract themselves and dull their desire;
• Boredom. Some guys perceive onychophagia as some kind of entertainment in their free time. When they don’t know what to do or are waiting for something, they drive in a car, watch cartoons;
• Imitation of peers, friends or older children who act as an example and authority for them. If a child notices that someone is already doing this, he thinks that it is good and copies the behavior model;
• Desire to avoid cutting nails. Children do not like to cut their nails, and to avoid this fate, they shorten them themselves using their teeth.

Why do children bite or pick their nails?

What does it mean? The main causes of onychophagia:

1. The presence of internal anxiety. A child, feeling anxiety that arises for various reasons, strives to cope with it, and onychophagy allows this to be partially done. The main reasons for anxiety: a feeling of self-doubt, phobias, a feeling of helplessness, low self-esteem, internal tension due to inconsistency with the demands put forward by others. At the same time, onychophagia is not always perceived by the child fully consciously.
2. Auto-aggressive tendencies. Auto-aggression, a definition denoting conscious violent actions towards oneself.
   Synonyms: self-harm, self-harm. Biting nails and the skin around them is considered one of the many forms of self-harm, along with causing cuts, burns, and hair pulling. However, not every nail biting can be classified as auto-aggression. But if a child chews his fingers very often and until they bleed, and there are other unusual injuries on his body (for example, an abundance of small scratches), this can be interpreted as auto-aggression. Self-harm can be done to punish oneself, and sometimes to relieve tension, since pain triggers the production of adrenaline, and mental pain is temporarily reduced. Auto-aggression is more common among teenagers.
3. Wrong approach of parents to education. If parents place excessive responsibility on the child, demand unconditional obedience from him, punish him not even for an offense, but only for the fact that the child did not live up to expectations, then the risk of onychophagia and many other neurotic habits increases significantly.
   This is due to the fact that the child constantly feels mental stress and is afraid of doing something not well enough.
4. Family problems. Children who grow up in toxic families are more likely than other children to have various neurotic habits and mental illnesses. Toxic families include families in which one or both parents resort to various types of violence against children (psychological, physical, sexual) and ignore the needs of the child. The following circumstances are also risk factors: loss of a job, divorce of parents, lack of financial resources, social and domestic problems, regular scandals in the family.
5. Problems in other microsocieties. Mental disorders are common among outcast children: those children who are victims of school bullying. Bullying doesn't just happen at school. It often occurs in circles and sections. But even children who are not bullied can feel mental stress. For example, this can happen if school teachers behave inappropriately with children, or if a child has quarreled with a school friend, or if he has not found friends and feels lonely.
6. Loads too high. Responsibility increases as the child grows older. The most acute period is considered to be when a child first comes to school and tries to cope with the burden of expectations and responsibility that has fallen on him. It is at this time that many children develop various neurotic habits that are difficult to cope with. Children who attend a large number of extracurricular activities are at risk.
7. Copying a habit. If someone close to the child suffers from onychophagia (parents, friends), he can adopt this habit.

Children with a history of any organic brain damage (hypoxia, traumatic brain injury, severe complications of infectious diseases) are more likely to suffer from various mental disorders.

Why is onychophagia dangerous?

Sometimes, at first glance, a harmless habit leads to dermatological, aesthetic, dental, and psychological disorders. What complications are onychophagia fraught with?

Infection with worms

Children have poor hygiene practices, and worms are common among them. The larvae are able to hide in the dirt that collects between the skin and the nail plate. When ingested, they penetrate the stomach and then the intestines, where they begin to parasitize.

Contact your doctor if you notice that your child:

• lost weight;
• complains of abdominal pain;
• eats without appetite or refuses to eat;
• feels itching in the anal area;
• complains of excessive salivation at night.

These signs are characteristic of helminthic infestation. To confirm the diagnosis, the doctor will order a stool test for helminth eggs.

Nail diseases

With constant biting, the nails will weaken, begin to grow much more slowly, peel, and become deformed. Onychophagia leads to the development of micronychia and onycholysis. With micronychia, the nails look shortened, the plate covers only ¾ or ½ of the nail bed. With onycholysis, the nail is partially detached from the bed. The detachment area appears white and opaque.

Onychophagia provokes inflammation, infections of the nails and skin of the lateral ridges. Causes chronic recurrent paronychia, subungual infections, infection of the tissues of the nail apparatus by fungus and pathogenic bacteria. Possible injuries, deformation, bleeding, bruises on the upper phalanges of the finger.

Dental diseases

Chronic nail biting by children leads to several dental complications.

Among them:

• damage to the enamel on the central and lateral incisors;
• chipped teeth involved in biting;
• twisted teeth, changes in bite;
• dysfunction of the temporomandibular joint;
• inflammation of the gums, infection in the oral cavity.

Psychological complexes

In addition to obvious physical health problems, a bad habit leads to hidden psychological disorders and complexes. Onychophagia is aesthetically unpleasant, because no one would like to observe this, which negatively affects the social life of children. It provokes comments from surrounding adults, ridicule from peers, and condemnation. All this affects self-esteem and causes internal fears, embarrassment, awkwardness, and uncertainty.

How to stop biting nails as an adult

Constantly eating a nail plate will not kill a person, but it can cause trouble.

Main hazards:

1. On the hands, especially under the nails, live hordes of various microbes. If you endlessly bite your nails and put your hands in your mouth, these organisms will begin to attack from the inside in the form of indigestion.
2. The shape of the nails deteriorates and the condition of the skin worsens. Hangnails and wounds appear that become infected, resulting in inflammation.
3. Teeth also suffer from addiction. Cracks and eventually chips may appear on the enamel. In addition, the oral cavity and gums become inflamed.

How to teach an adult not to bite his nails:

Get a professional manicure. Firstly, it looks beautiful and it would be a shame to ruin it, and secondly, a high-quality manicure costs a lot. Keep your nails short and regular. Try to understand under what circumstances your hands go to your mouth. This could be emotional stress, boredom, fear or overexcitement. Having found out the reason, it will be easier to control the process. Replace nail biting with another less harmful habit, such as clicking a pen, chewing an apple, or spinning a fidget spinner. Visit a doctor

Nail biting may be a sign of mental illness or fatigue, so it is important to correctly identify the root cause and safely treat it.

How to stop a child from biting his nails?

It is believed that most children will sooner or later stop biting their nails on their own, so if the child does not cause severe harm to himself, you can do nothing about it and wait it out. But not all parents have the patience; they cannot ignore it and get annoyed every time they catch their child doing such an activity. In addition, if a bad habit is not fought, the risks increase that it will take hold and remain for a long time. And in childhood it is easier to get rid of it than in adulthood.

If a child bites off his nails along with the skin around him, if there are wounds or pockets of infection, you need to go to the doctor and solve the problem together. Help is also needed if the habit appeared suddenly, if appetite, night sleep are disturbed, there is anxiety and irritation.

What methods will help with onychophagia? There is no universal solution, you will have to try several options. It all depends on the age, character of the child, perception of the world and others.

They are conventionally divided into two groups:

• aimed at changing behavior;
• creating mechanical obstacles to prevent the child from biting his nails.

General recommendations for parents

The first thing to do is try to determine the reason why the child bites his nails. Observe in what situations this behavior occurs. Try to talk to him, find out what's bothering him. Ask how things are at school, in kindergarten, whether you like the teachers or educators. Direct questioning may not work, so get creative. To find out why a small child at 4 or 5 years old bites his nails, ask him to draw a kindergarten, friends, family, house. And then show the resulting pictures to a child psychologist, who will analyze them and tell you where to look for the reasons.

In the fight against the habit of biting nails, it is important not to judge, shame or scold children, although this is difficult. After all, this approach will make the situation even worse. In addition, the child will understand that “biting your nails” is a good way to offend you, and will begin to manipulate. So try not to pay too much attention when he does this.

A child needs understanding, support, love, care, help. Praise him even for small successes. For example, if he did not touch his nails for only half a day. Understand that children do this not consciously or on purpose.

If a child of 8 or 10 years old bites his nails, let him choose how he will deal with onychophagia. This will make the treatment more successful. In this matter you must be allies, not enemies.

Prepare for the fact that the fight against onychophagia will be long. Here you need calmness, patience, not to give up and try different methods.

Onychophagia does not require any medication. But if the cause is related to obsessive states, a neurologist or psychotherapist sometimes prescribes sedatives.

How to influence a child's behavior?

In fact, different options have already been invented on how to do this. But everyone needs their own approach. Methods that help one person may not work at all for another.

What's worth trying?

• Give your child more attention. Hug more often, talk, play together, walk, read books. Sometimes the causes of onychophagia are a banal lack of parental attention;
• Try relaxation techniques. Let them listen to soothing music and speak positive messages. Take relaxing baths and massages. Give herbal teas with chamomile or mint at night. This has a beneficial effect on the nervous system and will help overcome the worry and anxiety that underlie this behavior;
• Talk about the consequences. Show how many bacteria there are on the hands, and that when a child bites his nails, they get into the mouth and begin to harm the body. There are many pictures on the Internet on this topic, designed specifically for children;
• Replace a bad habit with a more useful one. For example, rolling a ball in your hands with an anti-stress effect. Find a hobby that involves your hands: drawing, embroidery or clay modeling;
• Create negative associations with nail biting. The technique is called “anchoring”. Many psychologists' advice for a child who bites his nails is based on this principle. It is necessary to teach him to be aware of what he is doing, to create a connection between “biting his nails” and something unpleasant, so that the next time the child puts his hands in his mouth, he remembers the unpleasant sensations. The easiest way is to put a rubber band on your wrist and each time your child tries to bite his nails, snap it on his hand. This will cause a negative physical reaction to the compulsive action;
• Let's give some encouragement. Ask him what he would really like. Hang up a calendar and mark with a sticker every day you succeed in not biting your nails. Depending on the price of the gift, determine the number of stickers for which the child will receive a prize. Instead of gifts, you can agree on a monetary reward. This will be a good incentive for the child to earn what he wants.

Mechanical methods of control

Discouraging nail biting does not address the cause of the habit or encourage control, but it works for some children.

These methods include:

• Application of clear, bitter-tasting varnishes. When choosing bitter nail polish for children who bite their nails, be careful. Make sure that they do not cause allergies, itching, or burn the eyes if the child rubs them with his hands;
• Sealing the upper phalanges of the fingers with a plaster;
• Wearing gloves at all times;
• Prosthetics. Changing the texture and hardness of the new nail coating will change your attitude towards nails and help you wean yourself from a bad habit. This option is more suitable for teenage girls;
• Smearing nails with brilliant green or blue for a deterrent effect.

If suddenly the child is against the listed means, do not force it, as this will cause a feeling of punishment.

What should parents do and what should they do?

1. Try to remove the reasons that led to the appearance of the habit.

2. Make as much time as possible for playing together . If you are at work all day, be sure to set aside at least one hour in the evening to play with your child. This could be a construction set, making crafts, appliqué, role-playing games, puppet theater with animals, board games.

3. You can find an exciting activity for your little one’s fingers. For example, modeling from plasticine. Your fingers will be busy and won’t fit into your mouth. You can not only sculpt figures from plasticine, but also decorate with it, smearing it over the surface of a design applied to cardboard. At the same time, choose soft plasticine for work, since the little one’s finger joints have not yet become stronger.

to read a children's picture book before bed . Cuddle with your little one and read to him while he looks at the illustrations. Reading together brings people closer together, plus the little listener’s imaginative thinking develops. If your child does not fall asleep after reading, you can come up with a fairy tale yourself and tell it, or use audio fairy tales.

5. Learn to understand the baby , show more love, care and attention . Rejoice with him and hug him more often.

6. Accompany your little genius's new achievements with words of support and approval. Praise for successfully completed tasks . And then, gradually, the child will develop his independence and believe in his own strength.

On topic: Muse or Klusha!

7. Reconsider your parenting methods. Perhaps your baby is not yet ready to fulfill your requirements 100%, give him a little more time to fulfill. If you give him a task, consider his age and capabilities.

8. Don't overload your baby . Some children are overly busy during the day. It is clear that every mother considers her little one to be an intellectual, and therefore strives to enroll him in all existing clubs and additional classes. One child can withstand such a load, but another cannot. As a result, nervous tension increases and leads to the fixation of a bad habit. Therefore, build a daily routine so that your child enjoys going to activities that interest him. For “kindergarten students,” it is enough to attend one additional lesson in the evening or two classes on the weekend.

If you still want your child to study in several clubs, namely, dance, music, creativity, preparation for school, study foreign languages, then it is more advisable to distribute the load throughout the week and create a schedule in such a way that on one day there was one intellectual or creative activity plus one active activity.

For example,

• Preparing for school + Dancing;
• Acrobatics + Foreign language;
• Dancing + fine art;
• The development of intelligence will go well with Creativity.

If you attend serious sports clubs, the duration of which is at least two hours, then on such days it is better not to additionally burden the child.

9. Come for sand therapy.

In the process of creative play in the sand, together with a child psychologist, the baby will be able to reduce anxiety, get rid of fears and stabilize the emotional background.

There is no need to fight this habit by resorting to force and punishment.

Under threat, the baby will try to suppress it within himself, which will lead to increased internal tension, and as a result, you risk getting another bad habit in return. Therefore, do not focus on this and react calmly.

One of my friends, whose son periodically bit his nails, tried to wean him from this, regularly reminding him that this should not be done. And the child thought that this was such a game again. And, in order to attract the attention of his mother and play with her, he again and again resorted to using “his own way.” That is, the habit, reinforced by words, was fixed in the baby’s mind.

You should set yourself up for a long period of gradual cessation of this bad habit. Your task is to remove the prerequisites for the occurrence of this problem, then the problem itself will disappear over time. Only your love and understanding can speed up this process!

On topic: Psychosomatics

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Nail care for onychophagia

When treating onychophagia, proper care is important to help prevent complications and damage to the skin of the fingers and nails. It is better to check with a podiatrist how exactly to care for it. A medical manicure procedure will be very useful.

The main recommendation is to keep your nails short and filed. This way there will be less temptation to bite them. After all, when there is nothing to bite, biting your nails is much more difficult and painful. Another positive point is that with short nails, the depth of the gap between the skin and the plate will be smaller, which means there will be less dirt and bacteria that will get into the mouth. Depending on how quickly your nails grow, trim them once a week or once every 2 weeks.

Coping with onychophagia is real, although not easy. Show patience, attention, understanding. Explain to your child that you want to help and care about his health. Act gently, carefully, without coercion. And everything will definitely work out!

child

What to do

How to eliminate this habit in a child?

Children can bite their nails at any age. A 2-year-old child bites his nails, what should I do?

Here are some effective home remedies for baby's nail biting:

Calm worries

How to stop a child from biting his nails? If you notice that your child is biting their nails more often when they are stressed or worried about issues such as changing schools, moving to another location, or family conflicts, take time to talk to them and discuss what they might be talking about. worry.

Trim your nails regularly

Trimming your nails is a good way to minimize the urge to bite them. Trim and file your child's nails every week to ensure there are no sharp edges that would tempt them to chew them.

Girls can get their nails done at the salon so everything will look shiny and beautiful. Attention and care for her nails can keep her from getting bitten again.

Suggest an alternative

How to avoid biting your nails and the reasons for this? Give them something else to break their nail biting habit. The Anti Stress Ball is great for relieving anxiety. Squeezing it in your hands will help your child relax. Events and projects, clubs they attend are another good option. Arts and crafts and stimulating their imagination relieve stress. Outdoor activities, entertainment and sports are also some of the best ways to release pent-up energy. Most often, children aged 3 and 4 years old experience the habit of biting their nails. How to stop a 3-year-old child from biting his nails? - Since talking is unlikely to happen, use anti-stress toys or entertaining games.

Become aware of their habit

Habits such as nail biting are mostly unconscious. Your child doesn't notice that he's doing this most of the time and is therefore surprised when you yell at him to stop. Talk to your child about what causes him to bite his nails and suggest secret ways to remind him when he does it. It's good when done in a subtle way, especially in public places where children might be embarrassed. A tap on the shoulder or a code word that only two people know about is a good start.

Reward

When you see your child moving in the right direction, appreciate and reward him

Buy him ice cream or a new toy he's been wanting. Children naturally tend to please their parents and pay attention to them. Therefore, praising their mindfulness regarding their habits or forming healthy ones encourages them to repeat it

Find the method that suits your child

How to stop biting nails and eliminate this habit in children? It can be very difficult to get your child to stop biting their nails. The same method may not work for all children, so try new ones to see what works. Habits are hard to break, and since anxiety doesn't develop overnight, it takes time to stop biting your nails or create a new release. For example, a 4-year-old child bites his nails - be patient with him. If none of the methods work and your child seems overly anxious, consult your pediatrician for help. Anti-nail polish may be suitable for girls.

The Bitter Taste Trick

There are baby-safe liquids available in medical stores or recommended by your pediatrician that are made to stop nail biting. Apply this to your child's nails. Their bitter taste serves as a reminder to stop biting your nails.

Don't make a big deal

If you are worried about their habit, they may pick up on your anxiety and become irritable. They may also use this as a way to get your attention if you are not keeping an eye on them in other ways.

What to play with a child who bites his nails

Fairy tale. Together, come up with a story about a fictional character who—what a coincidence! - He loved to bite his nails. Take turns with your child and suggest options for the development of events: maybe the character once met a good fairy who waved her magic wand and helped him, or did he suddenly turn into a kitten and long claws simply became necessary for him?

Guessing game. Invite your child to close his eyes and determine by touch the fragment what kind of object you are showing him. Prepare materials of different textures in advance: a piece of sandpaper and suede, a shell, a peeled apple or grape, a massage brush-comb. Then switch: now you close your eyes, and the child will invite you to feel various objects.

Hello little man! Using a cosmetic pencil or washable felt-tip pen, draw faces on the nails of your baby's index fingers. Give the little people names and act out several scenes with their participation: let them visit each other, walk or dance together.

Causes

Here are some of the most common reasons why a child bites his nails:

For your own comfort

Babies and young children suck their thumb as a soothing activity that is natural. This provides them with comfort when they are playing or alone. Nail biting is a modified form of thumb sucking that develops as children grow. Consequently, children and even teenagers bite their nails.

Boredom

Children bite their nails when they are bored or do something monotonous. This can also be seen when they are not involved in any activity and their hands are free; while watching TV, for example.

To relieve anxiety and stress

Situations at home or school that may cause stress or anxiety cause nail biting in children.

There are many stressful situations that can cause them anxiety, such as:

• Loss of a family member or close relative
• Divorce
• Moving to a new city or home
• Entering a new school
• Punishment
• Family pressure

Imitating the habits of others

Why does a child bite his fingernails? Children quickly pick up on the behavior of others. Nail biting is one such common behavior and when they see another sibling or family member doing it, they imitate this habit.

Genetics

Chances are that your habits are passed on to your children through your genes, just like nail biting. Why does a child bite his fingernails? If you had this habit as a child, then your children may have it too.

Video of a child biting his nails Komarovsky:

Below are photos of bitten nails:

Adviсe

Tools, Tips, and Tactics to Stop Nail Biting

1. Replace nail biting with a good habit or fun activity: teach your child to play with a stress ball, fidgeting hand, or silly putty instead. This will help keep his hands busy and away from his mouth. Gnawed nails - nails that are chewed photo:

2. The following are methods and products to stop nail biting, but they must be respectful of others around the child. For example, children with sensory issues will never be comfortable sitting next to a child chewing gum.

So, the child bites his nails. The psychologist’s advice is as follows:

• After weighing the pros and cons and keeping the needs of others in mind, below are some tools, tips and tactics you can use to prevent nail biting:
• Using a bitter-tasting product applied to the nails: nail polish, lotions, perfumes, or homemade potions made from pepper or soap.
• Apply a bitter substance such as ginger oil, which is easily obtained by soaking ginger for two weeks in olive oil.
• Place the patches on your nails.
• Engage with your child and focus on fun activities.
• Reinforce positive behavior by praising it.
• Place a rubber band around his wrist and grab it whenever he has the urge to bite his nails.
• Can create a reward system to motivate the child for every small step.