7 difficult life situations and how to cope with them

Loss of loved ones

Death is inevitable. At some point in life, we lose someone we love and it seems impossible to cope with the pain and continue living without them. This is a huge grief, and not everyone can cope with it.

If you are trying to deal with the death of someone you love, don't be in denial. Accept this fact and realize that this is one of the stages of life. This does not mean that you should forget your loved ones who are gone forever. Keep them in mind, but make sure you move on. Your life will end one day too, so live it to the fullest.

Serious illness

A healthy lifestyle cannot prevent all diseases. If you are trying to navigate a long and stressful road to recovery, it is important not to lose faith. There is a reason why some people recover from serious illness while others die. It's all because of their faith and positive attitude.

You need to believe in recovery, think positively and do what makes you happy, even if you are in a hospital bed. This will help you get through a difficult life situation and learn to live with your illness if it is incurable.

Help in difficult life situations

Among difficult life situations, social protection authorities pay the closest attention to dysfunctional families where the child suffers from a lack of understanding on the part of the parents. Particular attention is paid to low-income and single-parent families in which a teenager misses school due to low financial status.

In this case, the state, in accordance with the provisions approved by law, can take the following measures:

monetary assistance in the form of subsidies, various compensations and pensions (for loss of a breadwinner, disability, etc.);
improvement of living conditions;
free psychological support;
rehabilitation medical care in special institutions: sanatoriums, dispensaries and rehabilitation and other health centers;
assistance in obtaining further education on a budgetary basis.

In particularly difficult situations, where the participants are minor children, the guardianship and trusteeship authorities are involved in solving the problem. In Russia, this is a special state executive body that controls the treatment of children.

Attention! The main goal of assistance in a difficult situation is to help the person in need adapt to the new prevailing living conditions and stabilize the situation.

Adaptation can be either favorable (the individual takes an active position) or unfavorable (the person simply adapts).

A person who finds himself in a difficult life situation can count on outside help. In order to cope with problems and stabilize his life, a citizen must make his contribution in the form of working on himself to acquire an active life position.

Job loss

Nowadays, for many, losing a job means the end of life. Why? Yes, it seems scary at first glance. You have to pay bills, buy food and clothes. But hey, it's not the end of the world. There are many other jobs waiting for you.

Give yourself time, update your resume and start looking for a new job. Instead of feeling hopeless, feel motivated and focused on achieving better results.

How to find your dream job

Unrequited love

Parting is painful, and for some, it is like death. Many people suffer greatly due to unrequited love or failed relationships. As painful as it may be, don't let a breakup ruin your life.

Focus on your loved ones, improve your professional skills, travel and find things you are passionate about. Self-improvement is always great. Plus, you won't be alone forever and there will be someone who will make you happier than you were in your previous relationship.

25 steps to reinvent yourself

A difficult situation as one of the varieties of a conflict situation

A difficult situation comes from the psychological essence of the conflict, as it arises in the process of human life.
The concept of a difficult situation in psychological terms is not sufficiently defined, which is why conflictology studies this issue. A difficult situation is a complex subjective-objective reality.

There are various classifications of difficult situations, both in domestic and foreign conflictology. Thus, domestic scientists identify the following types of difficult situations:

simple;
crisis;
extreme;
catastrophic;
physically dangerous;
informational.

When generalizing the approaches of foreign and domestic scientists, the following types of situations can be distinguished:

simple (crisis situation in everyday life) - the subject in this situation acts on a daily basis, without making any special efforts;
difficult (complex or extreme situation) – the subject’s behavior, due to internal and external circumstances, goes beyond the norm.

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The difference between a difficult situation and a simple one lies in the analysis of the life activity of the subjects in each specific case. Thus, a difficult situation to a greater extent causes moral and psychological tension in a person, where personal motives fade into the background; often a person strives to preserve life and health. The degree of danger of a situation is determined by the prevailing conditions and the reasons for its occurrence.

Common signs of a difficult situation:

there is a difficulty that needs to be overcome (for example, a person’s life and health is in danger, it is impossible to realize personal goals);
a state of psychological tension appears, which acts as an individual’s reaction to the problem that has arisen, and the need arises to overcome it;
Habits and parameters of human activity change noticeably.

There are also 2 types of difficult environmental conditions:

opposition of the environment - opposition to the situation of activity;
opposition to a person (person or group) – opposition to a situation of interaction.

Are you an expert in this subject area? We invite you to become the author of the Directory Working Conditions

Figure 1. Types of difficult situations. Author24 - online exchange of student work

Midlife crisis and aging

Aging goes hand in hand with death and it is not easy to accept both of these facts, but so far humanity has not figured out how to avoid this. As we age, we change physically and mentally. We see the first wrinkles and gray hairs and experience age-related diseases and low energy levels.

A midlife crisis occurs between the early 40s and mid 50s, and this is the time for you to decide how to cope with it. You can become discouraged and let depression stop you from enjoying life, or ignore the midlife crisis and aging and follow your dreams. Getting older is no fun, but dwelling on it is a waste of time.

Concepts and essence of a difficult life situation

Svetlana Kazakova

Concepts and essence of a difficult life situation

THE CONCEPT AND ESSENCE OF A DIFFICULT LIFE SITUATION , AS A REASON FOR ORGANIZING SOCIAL AND PEDAGOGICAL WORK WITH CHILDREN FOUND IN A DIFFICULT LIFE SITUATION

The purpose of this paragraph is to identify the essence of the concept of “ difficult life situation ”

and types of families at risk.

The content of the concept “children who find themselves in difficult life situations ”

, has quite a lot of components.

Definition of the concept of “ difficult life situation ”

given in Article 3 of the Federal Law of December 10, 1995 No. 195-FZ
“On the fundamentals of social services for the population in the Russian Federation”
.

A difficult life situation is a situation that objectively disrupts the life of a citizen (disability, inability to self-care due to old age, illness, orphanhood, neglect, poverty, unemployment, lack of a specific place of residence, conflicts and abuse in the family, loneliness, etc. which he cannot overcome on his own [1].

In Article 1 of the Federal Law of the Russian Federation of July 24, 1998 No. 124-F3 “On the basic guarantees of the rights of the child of the Russian Federation”

Typical
difficult life situations for a child .
Children in difficult life situations :

children left without parental care;

disabled children;

children with mental and /or

physical development;

children are victims of armed and ethnic conflicts, environmental and man-made disasters, and natural disasters;

children from families of refugees and internally displaced persons;

children in extreme conditions;

children are victims of violence;

children serving sentences of imprisonment in educational colonies;

children in special educational institutions;

children living in low-income families;

children with behavioral problems;

children life activity is objectively disrupted as a result of current circumstances and who cannot overcome these circumstances on their own or with the help of their family.

In accordance with these definitions, the following documents can confirm the difficult life situation

— Petitions, certificates, conclusions of bodies and institutions of the system for the prevention of neglect and juvenile delinquency, confirming that life activity is objectively impaired as a result of the current circumstances, and they cannot be overcome independently or with the help of the family.

— Certificate from the federal medical and social examination institution establishing the child’s disability.

— Medical certificate about the child’s health status.

— Certificate from the Federal Migration Service about the child’s status as a refugee or forced migrant and/or members of his family.

— Certificate from social protection authorities about the child’s residence in a low-income family.

— Other documents confirming that the child is in a difficult life situation [2] .

I. G. Kuzina considers the general concept of a difficult life situation as “ a situation that objectively violates a person’s social connections with his environment and the conditions of normal life and is subjectively perceived by him as difficult, as a result of which he may need the support and assistance of social services to solve his problem " [12].

N. G. Osukhova considers this concept as a situation life is disrupted , as a result of which he is unable to satisfy his basic life needs through models and methods of behavior developed in previous periods life " [20].

In 2003, according to the materials of the I-II scientific and practical conference dedicated to the problems of children who find themselves in difficult life situations , Professor S.S. Gil, Doctor of Pedagogical Sciences, presented the results of his analysis of the key concepts of one of the most important Russian laws - Federal Law No. 120 “On the fundamentals of the system for preventing neglect and juvenile delinquency” [7].

In fact, it was with the beginning of this law that it became possible to talk about the restoration of a whole-of-government approach to solving the most pressing problems of social education and social work with the younger generation. The appeal to this particular social law is also justified by the fact that it is the latest of the social legislation of the Russian Federation and has absorbed the experience of implementing other laws, in particular, the Federal Law “On the Fundamentals of Social Services for the Population...”

The law was designed taking into account the principles of consistency and represents a national model and technology of preventive and social work with minors on the territory of the Russian Federation, at the same time.

From the point of view of social pedagogy and social work, the law has specific features that shape the very method of its application.

This Law was created in the traditional manner for the Russian legislator. It is addressed to managers and officials identified as subjects of the prevention system, endowed with special functions and powers in solving the problems of minors.

The focus of the Law on persons (legal and physical, obligated to implement and ensure it, plays a dual role, including a limiting, in a certain sense, negative role [15].

On the one hand, an accurate definition of the circle of subjects of the prevention system eliminates questions about the responsible participants in preventive work, the range of their powers and responsibilities

On the other hand, the subjects of the system include exclusively representatives of government and management bodies, who, in accordance with the provisions of this Law, are both the organizers of preventive work and its implementers, which obviously forms a closed system of relations within the prevention system.

At the same time, the family and minors are considered in the law from an objective point of view, exclusively in a negative context, as objects of preventive work who find themselves in a socially dangerous situation.

There is no doubt that in practice, subjects of the prevention system mainly have to deal with minors and families who find themselves in a difficult and socially dangerous situation.

But the goal of prevention and social work is to get them out of this situation and give them an impetus to effective functioning and life in society . A child or family, as an object of preventive work, by definition, cannot achieve the goal stated by the Legislator.

The object approach, as the history of domestic, Soviet pedagogy and world social work has proven, does not allow the object to achieve goals that are inherent only to the subject of active social life .

This same negative focus also applies to other real subjects of the social education of a minor, not specified in the text of the law. These include public associations and organizations close to the child’s place of residence, whether for children or adults, such as associations of residents, veterans, etc., including those classified as forms of grassroots self-government of the population.

This attitude of the legislator to determining the circle of active participants in the prevention system can be explained by a number of factors:

— the traditions of the state-functional approach to solving social problems in Russian society are strong, and the vast majority of laws regulating the social life of society were created from the point of view of this approach, which actually monopolizes the role of state institutions in solving human problems;

— technological traditions in lawmaking are extremely weak, requiring the creation of a carefully verified algorithm - norms of behavior;

— the experience of preventive work with minors is insufficient, poorly generalized, systematized, including the experience of applying this law at various levels of the system [27].

A minor in a socially dangerous situation is a person under the age of eighteen who, due to neglect or homelessness, is in an environment that poses a danger to his life or health or does not meet the requirements for his upbringing or maintenance, or commits an offense or antisocial actions.

It is fundamentally important that, perhaps for the first time in recent decades, the legislator has precisely determined the party responsible for raising a child. In this case, this is a family, or persons, organizations replacing it. In any case, from the text of the last quoted concept it is clear that, despite various kinds of circumstances, it is the family that is considered as a factor of responsibility for the upbringing of a minor.

It seems logical that in relation to families that do not properly perform the functions of education, allowing the possibility of a child ending up in a socially dangerous situation, a special conceptual characteristic : “a family in a socially dangerous situation”

- a family with children in a socially dangerous situation, as well as a family where parents or legal representatives of minors do not fulfill their responsibilities for their upbringing, education and
(or)
maintenance and
(or)
negatively influence their behavior or abuse them .

The introduction of a new concept is important for creating a balance of rights and responsibilities of various social and state institutions in the upbringing of minors. With its introduction, the subjects of the prevention system acquired a tool for exerting legally justified influence on families who do not fulfill their parental responsibilities in relation to their own children. It is the influence, and not the removal of responsibility from the family by initiating the deprivation of its rights to raise children [6].

Introduction of the concepts of “ difficult life situation ”

,
“socially dangerous situation”
is a kind of criterion for distinguishing the situation of children who need help from the state and those who do not need it.

Promoting such a concept from the point of view of the legislator is the way to form a norm that determines the need for targeted attention to those who really need support and protection from bodies and organizations called upon by the state to ensure the protection of children and their interests. It is in relation to the difficulty of the situation of each child, in accordance with the above laws, that bodies and institutions, including education, must take the necessary actions to restore the rights of the child and the situation of his well-being .

The next category of children who find themselves in difficult life situations are children who are victims of armed and interethnic conflicts, environmental and man-made disasters, natural disasters (children in extreme situations )

These are children in need of care and help. They must be given the opportunity to study, including religious and moral education, in accordance with the wishes of their parents or, in the absence of parents, of those persons responsible for their care. All necessary measures must be taken to facilitate the reunification of temporarily separated families. Children under fifteen years of age are not subject to recruitment into armed forces or groups and are not allowed to take part in hostilities; The special protection provided for children under fifteen years of age continues to apply to them if they take a direct part in hostilities and are captured. If necessary, and where possible with the consent of their parents or persons primarily responsible for their care, arrangements shall be made for the temporary evacuation of children from the area of hostilities to a safer area within the country, while ensuring that they are accompanied by persons responsible for their safety. and well-being [25].

The number of difficult life situations in our time has increased significantly due to the disruption of the old way of life and the revaluation of values. Therefore, the most urgent and relevant is the study of how a person manages to cope with life's difficulties , with unexpected negative events, what strategies people resort to in order to cope with them or prevent the emotional disturbances they generate.

A difficult life situation is experienced by a person in different ways. On the one hand, it can have a destructive effect, increasing anxiety and depression, feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. On the other hand, to give life meaning , to make it more complete and meaningful. In any case, a confrontation with a difficult life situation is painfully experienced by the individual and changes his attitude towards life , towards himself, towards values, which forms various life strategies that help a person get out of a difficult life situation [7] .

Gusarova G.I. believes that children who find themselves in difficult life situations are children left without parental care, disabled children, children with mental and (or physical)

development;
children - victims of armed and international conflicts, environmental and man-made disasters, natural disasters, children from families of refugees and internally displaced persons; children in extreme conditions; children are victims of violence; children serving sentences of imprisonment in educational colonies; children in special educational institutions; children living in low-income families; children with behavioral problems; children life activity is objectively impaired as a result of current circumstances and who cannot overcome these circumstances on their own or with the help of their family [10].
In the Federal Law “On additional guarantees for social support of orphans and children left without parental care,” orphans are “persons under the age of 18 whose both or only parent has died.” Children left without parental care are “persons under the age of 18 who were left without the care of a single parent or both parents due to the deprivation of their parental rights, restriction of their parental rights, recognition of their parents as missing, incompetent, or declaring them dead, establishment by a court of the fact that a person has lost parental care, parents serving a sentence in institutions executing a sentence of imprisonment, being in places of detention suspected and accused of committing crimes, parents’ evasion from raising their children or from protecting their rights and interests, refusal parents to take their children from educational organizations, medical organizations, organizations providing social services, as well as if the only parent or both parents are unknown, in other cases of recognizing children as left without parental care in the manner prescribed by law” [24].

It is worth paying attention to such a category of children who find themselves in difficult life situations , such as children with disabilities or children with limited health capabilities. The health of the Russian population is in critical condition. The results of thorough research indicate a health crisis in representatives of all age groups, especially children. In Russia, as well as throughout the world, there is a growing trend of children with disabilities. Based on the provisions of Law No. 181-FZ and the Family Code of the Russian Federation, “a disabled child is understood as a person under 18 years of age who has a health disorder with a persistent disorder of body functions caused by diseases, consequences of injuries or defects, leading to limitation of life activity and causing the need for social protection.”Children with developmental disabilities are deprived of the channels of obtaining information available to their healthy peers: constrained in movement and the use of sensory channels of perception, children cannot master the entire diversity of human experience, which remains out of reach [23].

All social problems characteristic of modern society are reflected in the family, therefore all types of social work technologies aimed at the social rehabilitation of disabled children, providing assistance to the poor, etc. are applicable to it to one degree or another. There are also specific technologies designed to provide assistance to the family as such.

A nuclear family can be complete or incomplete (consisting of one parent with children)

. An incomplete family can become either as a result of divorce, or as a result of widowhood, or the birth of a child to a single woman.

A family with several family nuclei (grandparents, their children, grandchildren, or families of brothers and sisters) is called an extended family. This type of family was once common, but currently accounts for about 15% of all families as a result of the dominant trend towards nuclearization , the division of an extended family into several simple, nuclear ones; this process would probably be even more active in the absence of difficulties in acquiring housing, which sometimes force several families to live together.

There is also a typology of social risk, that is, the identification of families that, due to objective or subjective reasons, are in a state of difficulty in life and need help from the state system of social protection and social services.

These are families of refugees and internally displaced persons; families with an excessive dependent load (large families or those with disabled people, in which there is more than one dependent per worker; families raising disabled children; single-parent families; families of conscripts [28].

In a difficult life situation, the autobiographical memory of an individual undergoes very definite changes. The most striking of those discovered are three phenomena - the impoverishment of the past, the loss of childhood, and the ontologization of the present.

The phenomenon of impoverishment of the past is that in a difficult life situation it is presented significantly (three times)

fewer
life events than under “normal”
conditions (we used a modified
Life
Line ” ).
Moreover, the poverty of the event theme is clearly evident: the presented events of the individual past are more like a “standard autobiography - born, studied, got married
.
Whereas events of personal achievements and victories over oneself, creativity and feelings are practically not represented. In a difficult life situation, there remains, as it were, a “backbone, a template”
of the personality’s history.

The phenomenon of “loss of childhood”

lies in the fact that the subjects who were in
a difficult life situation imagined their lives starting from the “conscious age”
- on average from 15 years.
However, these memories were not repressed or suppressed - the subjects could easily remember many “childhood”
events, however, they did not evaluate them as important for them in this
situation , and as a result, did not consider it necessary to present them as part of their personal history. It is the events of childhood, loaded to a greater extent with emotions, that “disappear”
- so that a person in
a difficult life situation presents his life starting with his own actions, with his own decisions.
The phenomenon of ontologization of the present. In difficult life situations, the usually elusive “present tense”

unfolds for the entire duration of your stay in this
situation - up to several months. During this period of “present time,”
the subjects included formally past events, which, nevertheless, are relevant and are the focus of personal work.
Apparently constantly “working through”
these events, the subjects characterized them as
“beyond their control”
, which they could not influence in any way.
Obviously, external to the subjects, this situation became personally difficult precisely because it could not be accepted by them as part of their personal history.
An equally striking phenomenon was that all the phenomena of transformation of a person’s autobiographical memory that we discovered disappeared as soon as the subjective end of a difficult life situation , that is, when the situation difficult for one reason or another .

The distinctive features of difficult life situations can only be described by the complex interaction of several factors simultaneously, and each of these factors, taken separately, will not be a criterion for the complexity or difficulty of the current situation . We consider it necessary to highlight the following factors:

1) factor of probabilistic forecasting - based on an analysis of his past experience, a person assessed the probability of this event occurring as zero or minimal;

2) cognitive factor – lack of necessary knowledge, skills and abilities for life in a given situation , inapplicability of existing cognitive schemes;

3) behavioral factor – lack of formed behavior patterns;

4) vital factor, which is expressed in the subjective feeling of the impossibility of living, existing in an imposed situation ; it seems to a person that he will not endure these conditions, will not be able to come to terms with them;

5) existential factor – a feeling of loss of meaning, “existential vacuum”

The term " difficult life situation "

can only be applied to a personally
difficult situation . Such a situation can arise only in the case of interaction between the characteristics of the situation and the identity of the individual. It is identity that is the main phenomenon that determines the difficulty of a given life situation .
Some situations are perceived and experienced as “problematic”

, others – as
“
difficult ” , and still others – even
“turning point for
life ” .
Why do some life situations entail a significant change, or even an identity crisis (and the survivor says: “I’m not the same as before
,
“I’ve become a completely different person,”
etc.), while other
situations prompt you to notice only a few changes in oneself ( “I grew up”
,
“I became like this”
? And how to determine the extent of personality changes - in what case will a person experience what happened as leading to a
“personality change”
, and in what case – to
a “break, fracture”
? How many changes can happen to a person before
a “breakdown”
?

The phenomenon of personal identity poses similar questions to us. None of us are exactly the same as we were as children, or at school, or even a year ago.

To successfully solve the new and largely unexpected problems facing the state, society, and the education system, it is important to clearly understand the reasons for the emergence and growth of child homelessness and neglect. The main one among them is the destruction of the state system of socialization and public education of children without the formation of a new effective structure for the socialization and leisure of children in conditions of market relations [19].

Loss of property

Whether it's a natural disaster, an accident or a robbery, losing property is one of life's most difficult situations. You work tirelessly, take out loans to buy a house, car and other necessary things, so it is not surprising that when you lose something, you feel unhappy.

Remember, health is wealth. Don't overexert yourself. Stress causes illness. The last thing you want when coping with the loss of your property is to lose your health. Learn from mistakes and move on, even if you have to work harder than ever.