What is an open relationship: the pros and cons of love without obligations

What is an open relationship?

In such a union, people in a relationship accept and allow their partner, of their own free will, to be intimate with other people. Partners undertake not to resort to jealousy, hassle, revenge and similar methods. Both know about their love affairs on the side, but still stay together.

During this period, there are feelings between a man and a woman. They are a couple, perhaps even living together and thinking about a future together.

How can you recognize that you have achieved such a connection? The main sign will be a joint routine in your relationship. It often happens that after changing partners, people realize that they are comfortable and want to spend their lives with the person with whom they are in an open relationship, simply because they are truly happy with him.

Open relationships - good or bad?

Our world is bipolar, like everything in it. In this matter, everything is similar. Some people think that such a union is savagery, while others, on the contrary, are sure that everything is in order for modern reality. The question is different.

Open relationships - what is it anyway??? What are they based on? What is the foundation? Respect, sympathy, attraction or still a feeling of love?

Man is an owner by nature, but here you have to share what you love. On the other hand, some people purposefully provide their loved ones with unlimited freedom of choice, thereby showing complete trust in them. This is also an expression of your feelings.

It seems to me that it is impossible to give an unambiguous answer, bad or good. Depends on the individuality of people, namely:

outlook on life;
perception of such a union;
understanding what relationships entail;
joint desire to continue the family line.

Duration of open relationship

Whether for a woman or a man, complacency lasts until one of the partners begins to experience more serious feelings. In other situations, partners will behave without changes, relying on material wealth and social status.

An open relationship does not change either the guy or the girl when they enter into it. They leave communication with each other at the same level. Basically, people go to the experiment because of their interest in the unknown.

Multifaceted essence

The great mighty Russian language contains a large number of polysemantic words and phrases, the meaning of which depends on the context, life circumstances, and intellectual level of the speaker. Let's try to figure out how to understand the phrase “open relationship”:

Casual relationships by mutual consent of both partners. A man or woman is interested in an intimate relationship, and not in spiritual intimacy or living together.
Opportunity to date several members of the opposite sex. Such communication is the choice of people who avoid responsibility.
Freedom from everyday problems. Partners do not want to change habits, adapt, take into account each other’s interests and preferences.
Cohabitation is not legalized. There is no stamp in the passport. Sometimes the lack of a marriage certificate becomes a convenient escape route.
A free union of two adults, which implies intimacy, but no joint plans. Partners:

friendly affection is diversified by sexual intimacy;
meet systematically for health;
have a family or a strong relationship;
live far from each other, meet on neutral territory;
They experience only physiological attraction to each other.

Many people confuse “open relationships” with one-night stands. These are different things. Sexual intercourse that occurs spontaneously, under the influence of passion, alcohol or drugs, is unlikely to be continued. Whereas meetings by mutual agreement can last a long time. These concepts are united by a common ending: the lack of development prospects.

Why are they looking for an open relationship?

There is a theory that family marriage is a combination of three concepts: sex, money and children. That is, people are connected by constant physical, intimate contacts. And they are completely legal. Secondly, family life without earnings is impossible; you need to buy food, clothing, and services. And third, in every normal family, if there are no good reasons, children are born. They represent the crowning achievement of a relationship between two loving people and strengthen a marriage.

As for an open relationship, here two important components of marriage disappear - children and money. All that remains is the sexual connection. That is, a person is absolutely free from other obligations, he only has the satisfaction of his intimate desires. Agree, it’s difficult to call such relationships normal. In any case, for most of society they are unacceptable.

Why do people need such relationships?i

A man and a woman are going through more than their first divorce and want to create a new family that is devoid of “brain drain” and total control on the part of the partner. Perhaps this is how a woman moves up the career ladder - with the help of intimacy with managers and customers. And a man simply cannot think of stopping at one partner “for ideological reasons.” Why then have relationships at all? And why not: he is so pleased to come to a house where a woman’s hand is visible. And it’s good for her that she can spend the holidays that her married lovers spend with their families with her regular partners.

What is important about? The partners are not planning to have children; they are self-sufficient and do not want financial support from each other. In fact, they spend most of their lives acting like friends and equal partners.

Is it good? In that case, just great. Perhaps, over time, they will understand that being “good and calm” with a given partner is much more valuable than being “perky or well-fed” with others. They may want to stay in this interaction forever.

But in our cruel reality, everything is not so rosy. Firstly, free love is often offered by men because they do not want to bother themselves with responsibilities to their partner, but at the same time they want a hot dinner and an ironed shirt waiting for them at home. And the woman is not at all ready for them. For her, if there are many partners, it’s not a relationship at all. She is tormented, jealous and worried. But, I’m ready to do anything just to keep the man close. The man knows this and takes advantage of it. In this case, there are no open relationships; there is a rather mercantile use by one person of another.

Although, not only men can be such manipulators. A girl comes to the metropolis, meets a guy and moves to his territory. But she doesn’t think that a one-room apartment on the outskirts and public transport are the limit of her dreams. She is looking for other, more satisfying options. And he feeds the loving partner with stories about the “advancement” of open relationships. Moreover, putting pressure on his pride, like, “real machos are all polygamous.” His friends confirm the same thing, saying that you are lucky to have such a modern young lady - no scandals or scenes of jealousy. Only jealousy is present - his jealousy, his painful experiences. Because he doesn’t need this polygamy at all. He needs one wife, a classic wedding, a common surname and five children. This is his ideal of family relationships.

Polygamy

A FORM OF RELATIONSHIP, MAINLY MARRIAGE, IN WHICH A MAN OR WOMAN IS IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH SEVERAL PARTNERS.

Polygamy should not be confused with promiscuity, although this mistake does occur: unlike multiple and unregulated sexual relationships, polygamy exists in an almost inextricable connection with institutional marriage norms. As a rule, within a certain cultural cross-section, either the male or female variant of polygamy is recognized. It is a fairly conservative practice in which relationships are built on the principle of one or one plus several legitimate partners, have their own boundaries and clearly predetermined norms, and are also regulated by a set of ideas about the distribution of roles - both male and female.

Positioning polygamy as an alternative to monogamous marriage leads to the fact that a characteristic marker of relationships becomes their approval or tacit approval in a particular community or political system. Polyandry and polygamy successfully grow on prepared soil, that is, in those territories where these traditions have been around for many years, and they are based on a powerful fusion of ancient norms and rules, usually enshrined culturally and (or) religiously. And this tradition describes in some detail how and under what conditions polygamous relationships can function. Polygamy is more intuitive for a representative of any culture with a patriarchal history, but polyandry is also imaginable: such a practice is called polyandry and is common, for example, in Nepal and Tibet.

Advantages and disadvantages:

It is important to understand that the rights of participants in such unions are not equal. The leading position is in the same hands, and most often we are talking about the power of a man

A number of nationalities still exist in official polygamous relationships, approved at the state level, and in many countries the practice of official polygamy once existed, which was then abolished. Classic patriarchal examples of polygamy are perceived as humiliating for women and built on the principle of female competition for a “male,” but they can also lead to relationships of friendship and mutual support between wives.

How to organize a marriage with an open relationship?

First of all, you need to prepare your partner for a conversation and proposal for this kind of alliance.
It is necessary to structure the conversation in such a way that he or she does not suspect the partner’s betrayal and does not feel deceived or unloved. If there is mutual agreement on a free model, the details of the behavior of both, the permissible boundaries of freedom, and the rules of the relationship should be clearly specified. It is much more difficult to organize a marriage “without fetters” if the couple has a child.

Firstly, you need to act in such a way as not to traumatize the child’s psyche. For a child, parents are the closest and dearest people, and their behavior model serves as an example for him and a model for inheritance.

Quarrels, conflicts, misunderstandings can leave an imprint on a child’s psyche and affect the course of his entire life.

Secondly, in free unions with children, “asymmetry” often appears, since one of the parents is forced to constantly be at home and care for the child.

The second one does not change his usual way of life, allows himself occasional romances and devotes much less time to raising his child.

In this case, grievances are inevitable; they can grow like a snowball and ultimately fall like an avalanche on the married couple.

Psychologists give advice to families with children: to seriously think about switching to a traditional model of behavior or to divide the responsibilities of raising a child equally so that everyone has equal rights.

Basic principles of an open marriage

There are more and more couples with free relationships, and they are not afraid of public opinion.

Free form of marriage is based on the following principles:

A clear agreement
. If one of the spouses only tolerates the betrayal of the other half, then the union according to this scheme will not last long. Both partners should allow the opportunity to leave their native walls in search of new love adventures.
Graph distribution
. If both parties agree to cheat, there are some consequences to keep in mind. A man is always free in his movements, but the woman who gave birth is completely deprived of them. In an open marriage, one must take into account the fact that relationships with someone outside the family perimeter must be clearly discussed within a time frame.
Mutual respect
. The couple sat down at the negotiating table and decided to give each other the opportunity to experience thrills on the side. Such an agreement does not mean that chaos has begun in the family. It is one thing to have sexual interest outside of marriage, and quite another thing to change partners every day.
The importance of family
. In an open marriage, husband and wife openly cheat on each other, but usually spend vacations, holidays and weekends together. Relationships on the side also involve some expenses on the part of the man. The principle of an open marriage: spending on a mistress should not affect the wife’s income.
Delicacy
. Strange as it may sound, but when cheating is open, it is not customary for such a couple to brag about sexual victories. The spouses know about each other's affairs, but they prefer not to paint the details of their amorous adventures.
Talk about juicy moments
. With a clear agreement, some couples give the go-ahead for cheating and do not think about the consequences. In a family that has consciously created an open relationship, the issue of contraception with another sexual partner is first discussed.
Limitation in communication skills
. You can think a lot about indifference to society, but the relatives of a non-standard family will definitely be worried about idle conversations. The seventh rule of an open marriage says: keep your intimate secrets within your own walls.
A friendly front against evil slander
. According to psychologists, open relationships in marriage often hold together a family that has come to the end of a love story in the form of divorce. Even old feelings flare up again when a third person appears in a difficult situation and is by no means superfluous.
The concept of the incomprehensible
. The principles of a free marriage include educational work with the younger generation. It is difficult to become an exemplary family in which a child appears when mom and dad are not averse to wagging their tails on the side. These aspects should be discussed first if you want to have offspring.
Ready to break
. Each partner must understand that banal betrayal can turn into real passion. Ultimately, no one is immune from the possibility of divorce. To feel your exclusive importance in this matter means to initially surrender your own positions.

Minuses

Also, this relationship has its own disadvantages, which couples can solve together without blaming each other, these disadvantages are as follows:

During such relationships, partners must clearly understand what love and sex are, and they must know that they can be in an intimate relationship with any person, and love can only be built with one single partner. Cheating here is accepted as a natural phenomenon that can happen to anyone.
Many people view such relationships negatively, so couples should be prepared for bad reactions from relatives, friends and acquaintances.
Open relationships are not suitable for those who plan to have children and a family.
For such connections, a person must be prepared morally and psychologically. Possessive and jealous people are not suitable for such relationships.
Many people, in order not to take responsibility for themselves, pretend and hide behind these relationships.
Such connections cannot last forever; someday they end.
You can lose a loved one by giving him or her voluntarily to another man or woman.

Psychologists' opinion

The topic of free love occupies an important place in the psychology of relationships. There are a number of reasons why people crave love without commitment:

Fear of a serious relationship.
Rejection of the traditional family model.
Psychological immaturity.
Fear of commitment.

Psychologists believe that such relationships are more often chosen by young people who crave variety. More mature individuals tend towards traditional monogamous relationships.

Open relationships, like any other form, have advantages and disadvantages. Love without obligations is more suitable for unformed personalities. To create a strong and lasting union, it is important to rely not only on falling in love, but also on the moral qualities of the partner.

What's the point?

The essence of an open relationship is that two people refuse obligations to each other. They have a pleasant and easy romance, without any pretensions and joint plans for the future. Partners can live together and share all household needs in half, but everyone pays for unexpected expenses out of their own pocket. Or they limit their relationship to regular meetings. A pleasant pastime and the absence of scandals based on jealousy ensures the stability and strength of such an alliance. But is there any prospect for such a relationship or is it just a pleasant self-deception? Let's consider all the positive and negative aspects of such a life.

Two-way benefit

So what is the meaning of an open relationship itself? What is the essence of love without commitment? If a woman agrees to an open relationship, then the guy has the right to go left. A woman can also do this, only in practice she is left with nothing, because, contrary to modernity, she becomes a fallen woman who has several men. He, on the contrary, is a womanizer, and the demand for his body and a man’s sense of smell is only growing.

This is a process of self-affirmation. Psychologists note that such children not only have low self-esteem, but also lack social responsibility and moral education. The same as marrying a traitor, but not a womanizer. The latter always has his own princess, whom he loves, even if he cannot be with her.

There are differences between couples who live together, rent and pay equally, and share support obligations, and those who meet for sex.

In the first case, sex without obligations, as one of the norms, when the human is not alien, but in the current situation, intimacy is nothing more than just training or release. No one is looking for sex on the side, or deliberately trying to get into bed with another person. That is, sex for friendship, so to speak.

In the second case, it is not dependence that occurs, but a guest relationship, when the initiator is often a man. He comes to visit to get some sex. Women benefit from this situation, if they are already divorced, they do not want to support the boy, pay attention, depriving the child. A completely normal situation, similar to a triangle. He's married, she's too busy, and neither of them wants anything serious. It happens that husbands leave their wives when they are immersed in everyday life, and mistresses do not want to start families for personal reasons or medical reasons.

In these situations, the man will still win. Psychologists describe the portrait of men as follows:

Infantile people who are not ready to take responsibility;
Misogynists who have experienced the trauma of breaking up with a woman;
Selfish people who need nothing but love in bed.

Such guys cannot coordinate for a long time and understand themselves. It is beneficial for them to receive, without lies and promises, only what they came for. Their victims are girls who do not yet have experience and are afraid of losing them. There are also bitches who like to hold a man no matter what means. This, in a way, is also a moment of self-affirmation, only through donation.

You can find out more about women in love relationships in our article below.

What are people afraid of who “value” freedom?

Responsibility. Unexplored spaces of new relationships can lead to marriage. Not many people are ready for this, and even more are afraid of them.
To be deceived and abandoned. In this case, past experience in relationships with the opposite sex takes its toll. Not wanting to live through the saddest and most unhappy days, a person simply avoids new relationships.
Repeat the fate of mothers, fathers and other relatives. Every day, observing how dear and beloved parents, grandparents and others live miserably, a person does not want to repeat their fate. Without knowing exactly how to build harmonious relationships with other people, a man or woman can refuse love, hiding behind the desire to be free.
Unable to cope with the role of a spouse and parent. Due to ignorance of family life, many people simply do not dare to step into those spaces that are not entirely clear to them. Thus, a supposedly freedom-loving man and woman may not enter into marriage only because they are afraid of not living up to their own and their loved ones’ hopes in family life.
Their partners will suppress their personality. Many people are faced with the fact that their partners begin to interfere in the usual way of life of their loved ones, suppressing them and dictating their own rules of the game.
Any changes in your personal life.
They are not afraid of anything, but simply follow other people's ideas.

If you are one of the freedom-loving people, ask yourself what you are afraid of. Why should your relationship stop you from becoming who you want to be when you're free? Who are you trying to hide from behind “freedom”? Try to justify your desire to remain single.

If you ever ask truly free people what they would like, they will very much disappoint you. Despite their important appearance, steadfastness and love of freedom, which they can talk about, deep down they crave love with other people. They are ready to say goodbye to their lonely existence, which their freedom gives them, and fight their fears. But until a person understands himself, he is not destined to enjoy personal freedom while being in family relationships.

Disadvantages (Video)

This type of family is definitely not suitable for people prone to jealousy. They will find it unbearable to know that their loved one is or may be having an intimate relationship with someone else. Very few people are willing to accept this state of affairs, especially if they have truly strong feelings for their significant other. Typically, such a jealous partner tries to hide his emotions until the last moment, which subsequently often results in quiet, but at the same time cruel and sophisticated revenge.

Another significant disadvantage is the fragility of such relationships. Unfortunately, families that choose freedom often break up. This is usually due to the fact that one of the spouses is no longer satisfied with the existing situation; he wants more stability, have children and start living “as it should be.” If the other one is not yet ready for this, then the couple simply breaks up.

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You also need to pay attention to communication between spouses. Often open relationships lead to the fact that any problems and issues in the family are not resolved, but are left to chance

The partners simply leave home for a while.

Unfortunately, most open marriages break up

Another negative factor is the opinion of others. It is unlikely that the relatives of a couple who have chosen an open relationship will share their beliefs. And, if you can still endure the sidelong glances of your neighbors, then listening to the constant teachings of your parents becomes unbearable for many.

Well, we must not forget that an open marriage allows spouses to have lovers, and they are people too. They can demand more time, blackmail and create conflicts.

Pros and cons of a free union

Not every person will dare to enter into an open relationship, because in addition to the advantages of relative freedom, it also has disadvantages. If the essence of an open relationship contradicts the principles and worldview of one of the partners, this will become a serious obstacle in the path of the couple. It happens that a man and a woman do not agree on the stage of establishing rules and boundaries.

The disadvantages of a relationship without far-reaching prospects may appear later. Often, after long, close communication, one of the partners realizes that he needs stability and guarantees more than he previously imagined. In such a situation, there are only two options: to reconsider the conditions of existence of the union or to separate. If a person constantly experiences internal dissatisfaction with the behavior of the chosen one, contradictions, quarrels and conflicts are inevitable.

To create a strong, lasting union, it is important for a guy and a girl to understand whether they are really satisfied with the need to share their chosen one with others, the unknown, an unpredictable future, high probability and subsequent loneliness. Often agreeing to unacceptable, unattractive conditions, a person follows the lead of a partner for whom he feels deep affection and sincere feelings

In this case, no advantages will outweigh the disadvantages, and the possibility of further development of relations is in doubt.

Advantages

The benefits of love without serious commitment make men and women seriously consider changing their conservative views. Main advantages:

Nobody is jealous of anyone. The desire to forever get rid of excessively intrusive attention and constant claims from a partner spurs on guys and girls who have already felt the unpleasant influence of jealousy. A man who is in a couple can communicate and even flirt with other girls, and his partner perceives this absolutely normally. No jealousy - no scandals.
The world is not limited to one person. Partners who are in traditional couples often think only about their other half. The social circle of men and women who prefer love without obligations is not limited to passion. Such people devote more time to personal interests, expand the boundaries of their worldview, and consciously make new acquaintances that predict previously unknown emotions and sensations.
Strength and reliability of the union. Couples who truly enjoy the absence of commitment rarely break up. The basis of their relationship is not love or infatuation, but friendly affection.

There is a common misconception that only guys find advantages in an open relationship with a girl, and their partners see only disadvantages. Self-confident, financially secure, self-sufficient women often come up with such an initiative, rightly believing that it is possible to settle on a single chosen one only if you have deep feelings for him.

Flaws

Many members of society continue to condemn supporters of relationships without obligations, considering such unions immoral and contrary to generally accepted standards. In defense of their own opinion, opponents cite arguments:

Inconsistency of open relationships with moral standards. Many people consider love without commitment to be wild and unnatural.
The man and woman are moving away from each other. Having gained independence, partners need their other halves less and less every day.
Jealousy still arises from time to time. If one of the partners does not want freedom in love, suppresses his true dreams and desires for the sake of his loved one, their union will not be happy. When experiencing jealousy, a person withdraws into himself or brings down a lot of negative emotions on his chosen one, provoking quarrels and disagreements. Both situations will lead to a breakup equally quickly.
There is a risk of unwanted pregnancy, and there is a high probability of contracting diseases that are transmitted through sexual contact.

It is important to understand that any pros and cons of an open relationship with a guy or girl are subjective. Whether the union will be successful depends on the character traits, preferences, principles, and worldview of the partners

Society's opinion on open marriage

There is no unambiguous attitude towards such couples. Some people angrily denounce unions with the right to betrayal, while others consider them the norm.

In most cases, the free family model is supported by people who live according to the same principle. They voice their beliefs as follows:

Marriage is not a prison
. Adherents of open relationships believe that a stamp in a passport is not an obligation to be faithful to your other half. In their opinion, spouses are obliged to help each other financially and in matters of raising children - and nothing more.
Jealousy is for the weak
. Some people consider this feeling to be a lack of trust in their partner. They are convinced that owners are simply complex individuals.
You need to make the most of life
. In a monogamous marriage, it is difficult to maintain a vibrant sex life. Adding some spice to your relationship with your significant other in the form of a little affair on the side never hurts.
Self-realization has no boundaries
. In a sense, such a conclusion has a right to exist. But only if the ambitions of both partners do not cross the line of what is permitted.
The investigation is not conducted by experts
. In an open marriage, there is no such thing as surveillance, a thorough check of all the movements of the other half. A person in such an alliance is sent on a free voyage with a guarantee that he will be met with all honors.
Make people happy
. Some individuals believe that by taking peculiar trips to the left they improve the quality of life of their lovers. A very dangerous misconception then results in endless scandals involving third parties.
A good leftist strengthens a marriage
. Men marry those who completely suit them in every sense. However, as the years go by, minor quarrels and squabbles can destroy the harmony between spouses. The method of comparison with lovers on the side comes to the rescue, which often works in favor of restoring the family.
Why not
. The most interesting position regarding open marriage comes from that category of caring observers who themselves would not mind expressing themselves in non-standard relationships.

Opponents of open mutual betrayal of each other argue their censure of such couples as follows:

The absence of love is obvious
. A person brought up on the principle of monogamy will never understand affairs on the side of marriage. It is easier for him to understand the banality “hitting means he loves” than a challenge to public opinion.
All rivers flow to the mouth
. No matter how strong the passion on the side, a man often returns to the house where he feels comfortable living. In this case, the woman in most cases does not leave her native walls. As a result, observers do not understand the meaning of an open marriage.
Dubious paternity guaranteed
. Even if the spouses agree to use contraception, the family is ultimately not immune from the birth of a child from another man.
Hormonal imbalance must be treated
. Open relationships in marriage are considered by adherents of monogamy in the family to be a dysfunction in the body’s production of biologically active substances in both spouses.
A damaged reputation is guaranteed
. A woman is especially subject to public condemnation, when a cheating man can only be slightly reprimanded. It is always difficult for people to understand that a couple is satisfied with such a relationship.
The guardianship authorities will be interested in the family
. If a couple with a democratic approach to relationships on the side has a child, then problems with serious organization may arise in the future. The all-seeing public is able to convey to the guardianship authorities the fact of immoral behavior of parents in a short period of time.
Children will suffer
. Idle speculation can lead even an adult to an inadequate state. The worst thing is for teenagers who will have to listen to unflattering reviews of their parents’ behavior.
The jealousy of lovers is just around the corner
. Very few people like to share their chosen one with another person. The story of the eternal lover is as old as time, but sometimes the so-called backup option can rebel. Such indignation will definitely affect the family of experimenters in the intimate sphere.
The pseudo-family will definitely fall apart
. There is some truth in this categorical statement. However, not all families with a similar attitude towards marital fidelity file for divorce.

The pros and cons of an open marriage are difficult to assess for those who are not in such a relationship. Everyone has the right to choose the family model that will make him happy. However, we should not forget that in true love the third will always remain superfluous.

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What types of open relationships exist?

To get beyond stereotypical thinking and understand what an open relationship means, let's first understand the terminology. Using the right terms will help us recognize the difference between different types of interactions and determine what is acceptable to us personally and what is not.

Attention: all relationships discussed below are free. But there is a nuance

Open relationship

What is usually called free relationships in the Russian-speaking space is in fact correctly called “open”

In an open relationship, partners agree (very important word) that they can have other sexual partners. The question of whether third-party relationships can be limited to sex only or also contain a romantic component is individual for each couple

Open relationships are possible only when both partners are ready to be not the only one for their lover.

For the vast majority of people, this can be a difficult decision to make. In Russia, such relations, of course, exist, but they are rarely discussed openly. In the West, this phenomenon is more common, and in recent years they have begun to talk about it directly. For example, one study found that about 40% of men and 25% of women in monogamous relationships (with one partner) would be willing to move to a consensual, open relationship if it were the socially acceptable norm.

Polyamory

A fashionable new word that is just coming into use in our country. Polyamory differs from open relationships in that it places the emphasis primarily on love rather than sex. If an open relationship means that partners who are different in temperament, emotional and physiological make-up can satisfy their desires on equal terms, without demanding the impossible from each other, then polyamory is more of a lifestyle. Polyamory implies that all participants in a love relationship know everything about each other, communicate as equals and form a common structure. For example, in this relationship, your first-tier partner can also have sex with your second-tier partner, and it won't be a problem for either of you. Polyamory is not suitable for everyone, because it requires involvement in the life of each of the partners - this is a large expenditure of energy, which we sometimes do not have enough for even one partner.

The typology of these relationships is quite flexible, and one type may well transform into another. For example, in the acclaimed series “Why Women Kill,” Taylor and Eli are a married couple in an open (free) relationship. Non-monogamy is agreed between them, as is the fact that they cannot bring outside partners into their home and fall in love with them. But everything changes when Taylor brings his mistress Jade into the house - suddenly an open relationship develops into polyamory.

Polygamy

Polygamy is a legal feature of a certain people or territory. Polygamy involves a marriage in which one of the partners marries more than one partner. At the moment we can talk about polygyny (polygamy) and polyandry (polyandry), but who knows what legal forms of marriage the future has in store for us. Now polygyny is most common in Islamic countries and African countries, and in most Western countries polygamous marriages are illegal.

Promiscuity

Also an open relationship - promiscuous sexual relations with many partners. Some people choose this path for themselves because they are not looking for deep involvement in the life of another or spiritual intimacy. They may have a very high level of libido, which requires constant contact with others, or simply a large ego - fixated on themselves, their needs and their satisfaction.

An important point: when you think about an open relationship, determine exactly what it means for yourself. What kind of freedom do you need? What are you missing? And only then convey these ideas to your partner. If you think he can understand you. But don't be under the illusion that an open relationship is carte blanche to have as many sexual partners as possible. In such relationships there are usually even more restrictions and agreements than in traditional ones, because each couple individually determines the rules by which they will play.

How to change relationships easily and quickly?

How to transform a serious relationship into an open one or vice versa? The simplest and most correct option is to discuss this transition with your partner. Any relationship is built on reciprocity, otherwise it is doomed. You cannot manipulate the feelings and thoughts, actions of another person and force him to make the decision that one partner needs.

However, the prospect of an open conversation sometimes frightens people. Moreover, men are no less afraid of heart-to-heart conversations with their significant other than women. Everyone has their own reasons for fear. Some people are afraid that their partner will leave them altogether, others are afraid of being misunderstood, and still others do not want to be convinced. Many people are afraid of offending their partner or hurting their feelings.

What to do in such a situation? In the West, such problems are solved very simply, with the help of a family psychologist. A specialist helps people understand their desires, needs and acts as a kind of mediator during the conversation. It makes sense to take advantage of Western experience. It is not necessary to go to a psychologist. In addition, finding a family psychotherapist in Russia is quite difficult. You can ask for help from one of your mutual friends who has tact and has no bias in judgment or personal interest in relation to any of the partners.

If agreement is reached, then you can write new rules and hang them in a frame on the wall. This will remind people that things are different between them now.