How to meet a girl correctly and start dating a beautiful young woman

The main barriers to successful dating

Before meeting each other, women immediately scan a potential partner. As scientists from Princeton University have proven, the decision is made within the first 8 seconds.

The most common obstacles to getting to know a girl are:

unkempt appearance/bad image;
incorrectly chosen first phrases;
tightness or arrogance.

Easily getting to know and liking an unfamiliar girl is a difficult task even for a handsome, interesting guy. Excitement, inability to construct a correctly free, unobtrusive dialogue, lack of sufficient experience, or feigned swagger may interfere.

Choosing a girl “out of her league” is another obstacle to successful dating. The higher a woman’s social status, the greater the demands on her partner. Do you like beautiful, successful, well-read people? Develop, “pump up” your intelligence and appearance. There is another way - to choose an object of attention that corresponds to your current level.

To start communicating with a girl correctly, you should not try on masks. The unnaturalness of the image and behavior is visible to the naked eye. The woman will feel that the new acquaintance is only trying on a “cool phrase” that does not suit him. Changes need to be introduced gradually and assessed from the outside.

How to overcome shyness and approach a girl without a fluttering heart

It so happens that in modern society the first step is still the prerogative of guys. I can imagine how uncomfortable and exciting it is to approach an unfamiliar girl and try to start a dialogue with her. I could advise you to go through dozens of trainings on developing self-confidence, talk to your reflection in the mirror and think through different scenarios for the development of dialogue (is this kind of advice given at personal trainings?).

But I know what really helps is to overcome fear and approach girls calmly, even if you are shy. And not only when it comes to dating, but in any other situation: public speaking, sales, interviews, and so on. Do you know the saying “Water wears away stones?” Yes, that's exactly what I mean. Experience, experience and only experience.

No matter how many trainings you go through, no matter how much you prepare and think through your responses to the girl’s various reactions, everything in life may not go according to plan. But the more times you fail, the more you try and continue no matter what, the easier it is to accept rejection and the more confidence you gain.

As the creator of judo and the great Japanese master Jigoro Kano bequeathed to us: “you fall seven times, but you get up eight.” Good luck!

How to look to make a girl like you when meeting?

People meet you by their clothes - that's a fact. When a guy invites a girl to meet her, she immediately glances at him. A neat man with an athletic or at least normal physique is in an advantageous position. A straight back and slightly raised chin indicate a person’s confidence.

What attributes of appearance are the key to successful dating?

Clean and ironed clothes, neat shoes, appropriate size items . The style is not so important: some ladies like it sporty, others like it business-like. A win-win option - casual. It is better to refuse Hawaiian shirts, T-shirts with absurd inscriptions, mesh T-shirts, sandals in addition to socks, and unique headdresses. Perfectly fitting clothes are associated with success.
Basic hygiene rules : healthy skin, clean, neat nails, shiny well-groomed hair, fresh breath. This is “information” about a man, his health and attitude towards himself.
Smile . A natural smile is perceived as a sign of friendliness and willingness to communicate. Psychologists explain: the way a man controls his own face plays a big role when he first meets a girl. You should not hide your eyes behind the visor of a baseball cap, sunglasses, or look away to the side. This can be interpreted as a sign of insincerity or lack of self-confidence.
Light, confident and energetic gait . According to psychologists, it is this style of walking that makes the best impression on strangers. It is associated with extroversion, enterprise, and activity. If a person is outwardly attractive and well-groomed, he is unconsciously endowed with the best character traits. The “halo effect” described in psychology is triggered. That is why it is important to interest the girl from the very beginning - the effect produced will serve as the basis for further relationships.

Correct thinking and attitude

This is one of the main points, and more important than appearance and neatness. Your inner state is what sets the entire tone of your life and success. Even if you are not confident in yourself, all this can be changed by pumping up your inner state. Not immediately, but gradually.

Fear of Rejection

Remember that on the path to success with women, you will be rejected constantly, CONSTANTLY!!! For example, at the very beginning of the journey, the failure rate will be about 90%. And with each acquaintance this percentage will constantly decrease. Therefore, if you are afraid of refusals, then accept it as it is, believe me, you don’t have to please everyone, but getting upset over trifles, well, that’s just an activity.

Read more: How to make a girl squirt

Therefore, if you approach dating from the point of view of the game, then it will become much easier for you to communicate. The more you approach girls, the better and more confident you become. I repeat once again, they will refuse you, perhaps they will even send you to X..., but it’s not you who is a fool, but most likely there is something wrong with the girl. I understand that it is difficult to accept this information, because... I myself suffered from low self-esteem, but still this information needs to be immersed deep within myself. Failures are a normal practice in a pickup truck, you can’t live without it.

Required video to watch

Fear of judgment from others

You are walking down the street and see a beautiful girl. Are you afraid to approach, because suddenly she will send, and those around you will laugh at you or look at you judgmentally, are you afraid of that? A normal social phenomenon, it goes back to our ancestors, when we were afraid of being expelled from the pack, and being expelled means death.

Time passes, but fear remains and what to do with it? It can be worked out (sign up for a free consultation with me) or it can be gradually replaced by constant practice. Unfortunately, this fear is always with us, even if I now want to approach a girl, I will still experience a little excitement. But I’m already getting a kick out of it.

“An exercise to work through fear of the environment: print out your favorite positive song or poem and sing it loudly in a crowded place, for example, in a subway crossing. 3 times with breaks of 60 minutes. You will become more confident in yourself, and you will understand that people don’t care about you.”

How to meet a girl if you're shy

Yes, shyness is a gift from childhood. Were you by any chance forced to tell a poem to Santa Claus as a child if you didn’t want to? In fact, it's normal to be shy. Girls even love it, but not all. But again, everything depends only on you, if you gradually overcome your fears and embarrassment, then you will succeed and you will get a thrill from communication.

Guide to Changing Yourself.pdf

If embarrassment is a really strong obstacle for you, then it’s better for you to contact a psychologist who will remove this problem.

“Exercise: go to any shopping center or store and talk to a female consultant for 10 minutes using her profile as a potential buyer. Don't be afraid to ask about things."

How to properly meet and communicate with a girl when you first meet?

It is important to start meeting a girl correctly - to arouse interest, pleasant emotions and trust, to choose the right time and place. It is preferable to meet people where you feel confident, for example, in a gym or coffee shop that you visit regularly.

Before trying to get acquainted, make sure that the woman is ready to communicate. You're more likely to get rejected if she's in a hurry or on the phone. Another bell that you won’t be able to meet someone – the girl seems serious or concentrated. If it's appropriate, you can offer to help, but if the offer is rejected, it's best not to push.

Where can I meet?

The easiest way to meet someone is in the company of friends and on the Internet. But many successful relationships begin in places where there seems to be no romantic atmosphere. You can start meeting a girl and start a conversation anywhere - at a bus stop, in public transport, a store, an educational institution, an office, a clinic, a gym, a park.

It won’t be difficult to meet a young single girl in an interest group. Examples: foreign language courses, driving, dancing, yoga, theater studio, volunteering - the list is long. People spend a lot of time hand in hand, which promotes intimacy. Under such circumstances, it’s easy to get acquainted, start a conversation, ask for help or offer your own. After talking, you can agree to go for a walk together or visit a cafe, for example, to discuss an English assignment.

In transport, at a concert or in a cafe, there is time to make eye contact and respond with a friendly smile. If there is no reaction, it will be difficult to get to know each other. If the situation often repeats, you need to work on your appearance.

You can even meet people on the street, although this is considered banal. It's nice for a girl to feel attractive and special to the point that a man takes the initiative in such a public place. Seeing her, he forgot about everything and decided to meet her - she made such a strong impression. It's kind of like a social game.

Despite stereotypes, online dating is also promising. According to research, approximately 20% of future spouses met on the Internet. Previously, it was believed that this option was resorted to out of desperation, but today 60% of respondents agree that this is a good way to start new acquaintances, the main thing is to choose a quality platform.

The LOFT application, a prestigious online dating club for serious men and attractive girls, is just such a resource. You can count on productive and safe dating, because everyone openly talks about their goals and expectations. This saves time and allows you to quickly meet and start communicating with the right person.

3 strategies for meeting a girl

There are different strategies to interest a stranger. The most universal and advantageous is considered to be the “partisan” one. Using the situation, you need to start a neutral conversation. Examples: asking about the bus route at the bus stop or asking where they bought the chain (I would like to give the same one to my sister for her birthday). The advantage is the opportunity to safely “get acquainted” and “test the waters”. If the girl smiles and is open, you can continue communication and express sympathy.

Straightforwardness is suitable for those who do not like to pull the cat by the tail. You need to make eye contact, approach and start with a greeting. Ideally, the impression of naturalness and ease should be created. “I don’t even know what to say in such cases. Maybe we should just have some coffee?” is a suitable option.

For the most daring, a “daring” strategy is suitable. According to her, the right thing to do is to start communication by breaking patterns, evoking emotions and confusing the girl. Before she leaves, you can start getting acquainted. For example, you could say, “Why are you looking at me so intently?”

How to start dating correctly: basic steps

Take “small steps” - there is no need to mentally run ahead, conduct internal dialogues, come up with scenarios for the development of events and rude forms of refusal. It is correct to act sequentially: first approach and exchange greetings, then introduce yourself and find out the name of the interlocutor, and later - the phone number. It’s better to start dating a girl without thinking about the outcome.

Advice from psychologists on how to establish contact and meet a woman.

"Meeting" with the eyes. It is advisable to interest the stranger non-verbally even before the first words. After establishing eye contact, you can approach from the side from which the woman sees the man.
An appropriate phrase for the location. Sincerity and moderate originality are better than well-executed tackles. The first phrase should be concise, positive, short - no more than five words. It would be correct to speak on neutral topics.
It’s easier to get acquainted if you think in advance about suitable topics in which you are focused. This will help overcome the first stiffness. It is preferable to have a dialogue, but listen more than talk. Asking questions, avoiding value judgments and criticism, trying to learn more about the interlocutor - all this contributes to rapprochement. Look for common themes rather than interrogate.
Show emotion. According to research, communication filled with “warm” phrases creates a positive emotional background.
Track the girl's reactions and mood. This is active listening and conversation on topics that the interlocutor likes. Lack of attention is one of the reasons why after the first meeting a second one does not happen.
Say goodbye when your emotions are on the rise, and not during an emotional downturn or when things have already become “smooth.” This approach will leave a pleasant aftertaste.
Offer to exchange phone numbers or make friends on social networks. If you feel reciprocity from a girl, it would be right to immediately schedule the next meeting.

Tips on how to impress a girl and what to say when you first meet

When contact is made, instincts are triggered. A person is trying to understand three things: whether a new acquaintance is likable, whether he is prone to dominance, and whether he is trustworthy. This happens unconsciously. This approach was inherited from our ancestors - they studied the stranger in order to drive away the suspicious person in time or, on the contrary, give him a chance.

Tips on how to start dating correctly and “win” extra points.

The right thing to do is maintain eye contact, but don't stare. It is important to “catch” each other’s eyes, to catch the common wave. Eye contact is critical to establishing trusting communication.
Calm and clear speech is associated with confidence and inspires trust.
"Attunement." It is believed that in order to make a pleasant first impression, you need to synchronize the maximum number of “impulses”: intonation, facial expressions, gestures and even the pace of speech. If this can be done correctly, the couple seems to find themselves in their own world, isolated from the rest.
Smart compliments. Instead of trivial phrases, it is better to notice interesting details in the image. For example, “What graceful hands you have” or “You have a very unusual eye color.”
Tact. There is no need to push or force someone to do something - it is important to respect personal boundaries.

Primary sexual signals help strengthen the impression of a new acquaintance, for example, a longer gaze, copying gestures, straightened shoulders. These signs signal interest in a girl - the opposite sex reads them instantly. Confident men give these “signals” unconsciously. But if a person is shackled, this does not happen.

How to meet a girl on social networks

The advantage of social networks is obvious: they provide a lot of information and, in a sense, simplify the first step. But there are pitfalls here too. Try the following tips to get the attention of a beautiful stranger.

Look for a passion in thematic groups

The easiest way to make acquaintances and find a suitable match is to choose based on your interests. Groups, public pages, events on social networks - you can meet people right there or contact the girl privately. It won’t be difficult to come up with an approximate list of topics for conversation.

Write messages or comments

If you want to get acquainted, it is better to demonstrate this verbally, and not silently shower the girl with dozens of likes. In the latter case, you will most likely be mistaken for an inadequate or childish person.

Monitor your online behavior

Posting about your recent breakup with your ex? Post pictures about how all women are bitches? Are you being rude in the comments? Then don't be surprised if your messages go unanswered.

Honor literacy

If punctuality is the politeness of kings, then literacy is the politeness of Internet users. It is also the first evidence that you have a developed intellect. Therefore, try not to make at least basic mistakes. If in doubt, look for answers in dictionaries or on thematic resources.

If you are not confident in your knowledge of the Russian language, try taking this test first. A below-average result means it’s time to brush up on your school rules.

Avoid extremes

An instant transition to “you” may seem hasty to some. But persistently writing “you”, and with a capital letter, and at the same time flirting with the style of the 19th century is not the best option. So you will be mistaken more for a mothball eccentric than for an interesting and modern man.

First meeting after meeting on the Internet

Continuing communication in reality after meeting online is another difficult task for the stronger sex, since seduction needs to start all over again. For the first meeting, a neutral area, such as a cafe, is suitable. Even if you’ve been communicating online for a long time, it’s stupid to rush in with open arms, but excessive restraint is also inappropriate. The best greeting is a slight nod of the head, a smile and a hand gesture.

To get rid of tightness, you need to try to behave as if this person has been known to you for a long time. If you can't decide on the first topic to talk about, continue and expand on the one you spent hours talking about virtually.

How to meet a girl on a dating site

It would seem that meeting people through specialized sites or services is as easy as shelling pears, because they are used by girls who are in search. But there are no fewer potential satellites there. To improve your chances, follow these rules.

Be smart about filling out your profile

Do you want a serious relationship? Then don’t post (or at least don’t make it the main thing) a photo of your torso and other bare areas of your body. Even if you have mind-blowing abs. Even if it’s a sin to hide such beauty.

Instead, bet on pictures that reveal your personality and show off your face.

Also, take the time to fill out your profile in detail and pay special attention to the section where you indicate your interests. Remember: the more specific the description, the greater the chances of meeting the right person. So don't limit yourself to general phrases.

Avoid Newbies

Most dating sites advertise to new users by placing them on the first pages of searches or in special sections that everyone else can see. As a result, newcomers (especially girls) receive a lot of messages. So yours might just get lost.

Don't be familiar

No matter how much the girl in the photo reminds you of a wild cat or a princess, you should not inform her about this in the first message. For dating - even on specialized sites - kind words and tenderness are inappropriate.

Say no to platitudes

Dating sites and services create the feeling of a lot of choice. And given that girls generally receive more messages there than men, the latter have to stand out.

The cruel truth: the next “hello, how are you” does not create a desire to answer, and a standard interrogation with bias discourages all desire to continue the conversation.

Be more specific. To make an acquaintance, use the information provided in the girl’s profile, or choose an unusual topic for conversation. For example, offer to share crazy life stories or tell about the most unusual dream. This way you will attract attention, avoid tedious surveys and break the ice.

And forget about mailings

Some men, tired of writing hundreds of greeting messages, decide to come up with one: large, detailed and universal. At least that's what they think. In fact, text that lacks individual appeal is immediately visible and arouses even less interest.

The advice is simple: decide what kind of woman you are looking for, take the time to select suitable candidates, and write to them at least one, but lively phrase. Repeat the procedure if necessary. As they say, seek and you will find.

Of course, some of the recommendations given here are universal: both on the Internet you need to remain tactful, and in real life you should monitor your speech literacy. There are two other fail-safe methods that work in any conditions: make sparkling jokes and ask the girl questions, thus demonstrating your interest.

Do you know other effective techniques? Share them in the comments!

Typical mistakes when first communicating with a girl

Often girls, when meeting for the first time, are put off by hackneyed phrases or pre-thought-out remarks. It is better to avoid banal statements like: “You look beautiful”, “Can I talk to you?”, “Does your mother need a son-in-law?”, “My angel, have you fallen from heaven?”

Other common mistakes to avoid when dating.

Flirting from the first second is undesirable, as is excessive familiarity.
Insolence, boasting, arrogance.
Trying to guess the age.
Negativity, complaints, unkind phrases about the interlocutor and about women in general.
Conversations on complex and controversial topics, including politics and religion. The right thing to do is to discuss what evokes warm emotions.
Greed or lack of money.
Violation of personal boundaries - attempts to hug, “pressure”.

There is no need to immediately start asking for a phone number after meeting someone. The man should offer to continue communication, but the choice is always up to the girl. Does the stranger keep refusing? You can leave your contact number with the words: “If you want to chat, just send me an emoticon in a message.”

What to say when meeting?

A typical problem for a huge number of representatives of the stronger sex. It’s not scary if the first words were a little crumpled - this is not too important for girls, but it really hurts the pride of young people.

Do not confuse self-confidence with intrusiveness

The main aspect is interest in each other, and a conversation can start on absolutely any, even the most insignificant, basis. The main thing is more practice and less embarrassment - then everything will definitely work out!

Communication rules

In addition to all that has been said, I would like to give some tips on how to behave on dating sites:

Don't be boring. They don’t like people like that and try to get rid of their annoying interlocutor.
Dose out compliments. They should be, but not too often.
Monitor the adequacy and literacy of your speech. Educated people are always valuable.
Do not post pictures from the Internet instead of photographs. This will raise suspicions of fraud. If you don’t want to “shine” your face to the whole country, explain this to the girl in an understandable way and offer to send pictures by email.
Once you start communicating, do not disappear from the site immediately after sending the message. Perhaps the person you are talking to online will answer you right away. But the delay in response on your part will look at least strange.
Don’t procrastinate online meetings, bring the relationship into real life. Otherwise, the chosen one will choose another, more decisive man.

Original and important tips

A girl wants to meet someone no less than a man, and a gallant and unexpected approach will cause her genuine delight. Therefore, it is necessary to get acquainted even when there is no readiness, mood or nothing to say. The very fact of showing male courage can win a woman’s heart.
You can start an acquaintance with a non-trivial phrase - “A friend and I had an argument...” or “What do you think...” and others.
There should be no restrictions on the place of dating. This needs to be done everywhere - in a cafe, on the street, in a shopping center, on a trolleybus, in a queue.
You should not retreat immediately if the girl did not answer the proposal with consent the first time. Perhaps she is just flirting and waiting for original moves from the man. For example, if you are refused an acquaintance on the street, you can take advantage of this and invite the girl to meet you in a cafe.
Never miss girls. In the case of a man approaching, the chances of a man are at least 50%, in the case of a girl missing - definitely 0%.

The desire to meet women is a natural and most beautiful feature of male nature. However, the social behavior of men is filled with fears, self-doubt and leads to the denial of personal happiness next to the woman of his dreams.

Another video with tips for meeting girls.

You can talk for a long time about ways out of the grogy state, building dozens of theories and hypotheses. This is all quite useful, but a man must take away one most important idea from the knowledge base - only he himself can make his life better , through practice and daily development.