There is no boundary between passion and love! But there is a difference.
It is impossible to set boundaries between passion, love, and infatuation. Of course, there is a certain degree in the relationship. We can love a person stronger or weaker, but in any case there will be some feelings.
If you have coitus with a person, and it is not rape or perversion, then you have feelings for this person. Apart from prostitutes or other perversions, in order for me to engage in coitus with a person, I must open up to him. In this sense, many people think that a man, like a monkey, is ready to have sexual intercourse with everything that moves. In fact, this is far from the case. A man must also experience feelings to allow coitus to occur in his relationship.
It must be love or sympathy, something very subtle, but it must be there. From this, relationships may emerge in the future. Love in its essence is the moment when we begin to see in a person what we lack in ourselves. This flaw is usually always very strange. It never matches the romance you read in books, saw in a movie or on a forum.
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This is not walking through parks hand in hand or drinking champagne on the seashore. Sometimes it finds a very strange way out. For example, if a woman wants to feel weak, she may start doing everything to get a man to beat her. When the beating begins, such strong but weak women begin to experience incredible unconscious pleasure. From the point of view of public opinion, this is somehow unacceptable and does not correspond to moral standards, but this is love. Only on this basis are the feelings mutual.
Love is always mutual
Remember this once and for all. I understand that this terribly contradicts your understanding of unrequited love, etc., but only on the basis of something common can it arise. Let's put two facts together:
- love is always mutual
- love is to find in a person what is missing in ourselves.
Based on this, feelings arise at the moment when we are abandoned, for example. A person finds himself in a position of abandonment and begins to love. In this case, the psychologist will not restore your relationship. It will work with your need to be abandoned.
Sometimes people complain that they love a person, but they don't like the fact that he drinks constantly. In such cases, love appears when a woman next to such a man for the first time takes the position of saving. She needs someone she will save, because that’s what she lacks.
The path from passion to love
When a man and a woman begin a relationship, the very first thing that appears between them is passion. This is what they call love at first sight. This is only a name, but not yet love. The difference between passion is that it is based on sexual attraction
In the future, you get to know your partner from different sides (intellectual, emotional, psychological, etc.), passion develops into deeper feelings - falling in love. The physical side, of course, does not fade into the background, but sympathy for a person is complemented by his views on life and character traits. Don't forget that people who are passionate about something can arouse greater interest in themselves than those who have a limited range of activities.
When responsibility for a partner appears in a relationship, it is safe to say that passion and infatuation have grown into love. There is no love where there is no desire to be together as long as possible, to lead a common life, to build a common future. If you and your significant other have achieved this in your relationship and are carefully building it together, then you definitely don’t need to worry. Your romance is not devoid of passion, but is based on higher-quality and long-lasting feelings.
By starting a love affair, both a man and a woman cease to exist each on their own. Together they are responsible for the harmony of their life together. How long their love will last depends only on these two people.
Passion, love and infatuation are three different feelings. If you want a happy life as a couple, then learn to distinguish one from the other so as not to be misled. It often happens that a woman hopes for marriage, while a man only needs to be in her bed.
We wish that, after reading this article, you will always be able to navigate in any relationship and not make unnecessary mistakes in a situation where passion was mistaken for love.
Love and social roles.
Sometimes a young man can see in a woman something that does not belong to her social role. In the process of filming videos, I also play a certain social role of an intelligent, well-read psychologist, although in reality I have not read all my books. What roles do we all have, we work, and at work we are not the same as at home.
Here is an example of the situation of one of my clients. He gave me permission to disclose this. This client, by our standards, earns a lot - several million a month. He has a wife with whom he lived for 10 or 15 years. At one point she begins to nag him for not washing the dishes after himself. They have this kind of family ritual. This man begins to complain to me that he earns millions, his wife sits at home, but nags him for the dishes.
This is what love is. The wife in this case sees him as a person, not a millionaire with his social role, but a man who didn’t wash the dishes. These are real love relationships in which something always doesn’t work out. If she understood that a millionaire could wash the dishes herself, then there would be no love, there would be something else. This woman sees a man in her millionaire.
What's the difference between love and passion?
In the Ozhegova dictionary, love is defined as a strong feeling of deep affection, selfless and sincere affection. And passion is like an ardent desire. These two conflicting definitions will help us distinguish between these feelings.
From these definitions it is clear that love is based on intimacy, while passion is purely on desire. In addition, they also differ in the types of relationships.
But sometimes it becomes difficult to separate passion and love because passion can be in the presence of love. Let's try to analyze relationships during love and passion. This will help us learn to separate them.
How does love manifest itself in relationships between people? When love lives in a relationship between two people, each of them highly values the happiness and desires of the other. The influence of love manifests itself in a variety of ways: initiative in free time from work, actions and words.
During love, the couple behaves thoughtfully towards each other, always remembering the feelings of their partner. Each partner puts his partner above himself.
In such a relationship, the couple spends their free time based on mutual love and respect. Each action is considered and chosen with extreme care, taking into account the feelings of the partner.
In case of disagreement, both partners strive to agree, find a compromise or a common solution.
Finally, relationships based on love, as a rule, always last. Because the presence of love allows a couple to go through any problems and difficulties that arise between them. Thoughtfulness and care help a couple grow and stand the test of time.
How do passionate relationships manifest themselves? Passionate relationships may not always produce negative effects. But they cannot be as confident and positive as love. Like love, passion also influences the relationships, actions and words of people.
The primary difference between passion and love is that in a loving relationship, partners put the happiness of the other above themselves, while in a passionate relationship, partners strive to achieve their own desires, and put them first and foremost.
The fundamental selfishness that exists in a passionate relationship slowly oozes out and influences absolutely all actions and the relationship itself as a whole.
While in sincere love a couple strives to find a compromise and a solution with which they will both be happy, in a passionate relationship each of the partners is more inclined to achieve their personal desires, regardless of the feelings of their partner, and whether he will too happy.
The final characteristic of a passionate relationship
- this is the short duration of the relationship itself. Because passionate relationships exist only thanks to passion and desire itself. And when the goal is achieved, the passion disappears and the partner no longer becomes desirable. Without passion, feelings begin to fade and disintegrate.
Moreover, the characteristic features of passionate relationships - selfishness and lack of respect - also lead to short and noisy relationships.
It's simple. Is not it? But…
Love cannot exist within passion. And passion can very often exist within the boundaries of love.
Passion cannot include love. Because the main feature of egoism does not allow love to enter as a factor in passionate relationships. Placing your own desires above the desires of your partners eliminates the formation of love.
But the presence of passion in a loving relationship is often manifested by the usual desire to become closer to the partner. As long as it doesn't exceed love, it's a healthy part of a relationship and can lead to even greater intimacy and stronger bonds between partners.
Separating love from passion can be complicated in different ways. But you must always remember the difference between love and passion - a loving relationship is based on dedication and care, while passion is characterized by selfishness and imprudence. But they cannot be opposed to each other.
If you ask something like this, you are not sure about the relationship!
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If a person is wondering about the difference between love and passion, most likely he is in a relationship with something that he is not sure about. Then the question is a little different. What is a person’s insecurity and why did it arise? Perhaps this is due to the fear of going the wrong way and making mistakes. Perhaps you want everything to be wonderful, like in books and films. However, you will never find anything like this. There will always be mistakes and disappointments.
In a love relationship, something always doesn’t go well; there is a certain emptiness and lack. No matter how successful you are, you must wash the dishes. This analogy is everywhere. This is absolutely normal. If there were absolute harmony and happiness, I would find a problem in this, which indeed there is.
Results
Love and passion are practically the same thing. There are simply certain facets and degrees of love that I experience. I can love more or less. For there to be passion, there must be some feelings and emotions.
There are sexual couples for whom everything is tied up around sex, but they break up quickly. Love is when you see in a person a lack of something in yourself. This lack is usually socially uncomfortable.
This is something you need to remember to stop struggling to create your ideal life. Ideals simply do not exist.
Comparison
Passion is closely related to desire, lust. But when the desire is fulfilled, satisfied, the passion, as a rule, fades and comes to naught. Relationships in which love reigns supreme last much longer.
Passion is an egoistic, possessive feeling; it is impatient and categorical. Passion deprives a person of freedom, making him emotionally dependent. If necessary, she will undoubtedly put relationships with other people on the line and cause pain. When passion is a priority, it ultimately destroys itself and the couple's relationship.
If passion is without love, then such relationships have no future. Love can exist without passion. Very often, passionate feelings turn into a peaceful, calm channel. Passionate impulses are replaced by trust, mutual respect, and need for each other. Love is based on self-giving, selflessness, forgetting oneself for the sake of another. Love says: "What am I
can I do
for you
?”, and passion shouts: “What are
you
ready to do
for me
?” Passion goes ahead, love is tactful and noble, it is not in a hurry, it does not rush.
Passion makes you fall into addiction akin to a drug, painfully wanting more and more bright and strong emotions. But such violent feelings cannot exist for a long time. Passion can lead to humiliation, love never humiliates, but, on the contrary, elevates and gives strength to live.
