How to develop a sense of humor? The question is interesting and important. After all, it is the ability to joke that makes it easier to overcome life’s difficulties. It also allows you to quickly establish contact with others and more easily win a favorable attitude towards yourself. Probably everyone can remember a lot of situations in which a sense of humor reduced tension and united participants in a dialogue.
That’s why they often say that a developed sense of humor is the key to success and peace of mind. For example, here is what the famous writer of the last century, Erich Maria Remarque, wrote about him: “We joke not because we have a sense of humor, no, we try not to lose our sense of humor, because without it we would be lost.”
Is it possible to learn the art of jokes?
For some people, the ability to make good jokes is a natural gift. Often they are the ones who quickly become the life of the party and in life more easily reach great heights. If you do not belong to this category of lucky people, do not be upset and give up. There is good news for you - a sense of humor can and should be developed!
Numerous studies have proven that there is a genetic predisposition to see funny things around and wittyly share your observations with others. In particular, according to results published in the popular Medical Daily, the 5-HTTLPR gene has a great influence on this process.
At the same time, modern psychologists have found that the older a person gets, the more his ability to joke depends on himself and his living environment. After all, the sense of humor changes as we grow older and our thought processes become more complex. Therefore, the desire to develop it is a very real task!
How to develop a sense of humor in yourself
You sit in front of a TV or computer screen and watch KVN, “Projector Paris Hilton”, “League of Laughter” or some other program. Has it ever happened that you laughed until your stomach hurt and couldn’t stop? At such moments, you probably asked yourself the questions: “How can they come up with something funny on the fly?”, “Eh, it wouldn’t hurt me to learn how to joke funny,” “Is it possible to develop a sense of humor in yourself?”
Watch the 2021 episode “SpotlightParisHilton” in the video, cheer up and boost your sense of humor a little:
I’m sure you definitely have friends with whom it’s always fun, because they constantly tell jokes or some funny incidents from life. None of them graduated from acting school, so you think: “You can only be a comedian from birth” or “What a simple joke, but everyone laughs until they cry.”
Maybe some joke has already appeared in your head several times, but you were afraid to just say it? At this time, someone else joked the way you wanted. Yes, you again did not dare to make jokes, like Urgant or Pavel Volya, so you need to get rid of fears, love yourself and just learn to joke in any situation.
Now let's look at the reasons for the lack of a sense of humor:
- You never set out to develop a sense of humor and wit. Agree, it is unlikely that you would become a good marketer, businessman, teacher or doctor if you did not study. This is how things are with humor. Do you want to learn how to joke? Practice, practice, practice.
- You are a very smart person. Studies have been conducted that have determined that people with developed creative thinking are more successful jokers. Why? Because a joke is an unexpected combination of words, and not a strict algorithm. But even a very smart person can develop a good sense of humor, the main thing is to practice.
- You are sick. British psychologists have concluded that loss of a sense of humor may be a signal of the onset of Alzheimer's disease. Just don’t rush to go to the doctor, try to improve your sense of humor first.
I would like to note one more important truth: a person with a good sense of humor should not be funny or amusing. The goal is to learn to see the positive in any situation, reduce stress from the crazy pace of modern life and develop your own charisma.
Why is it important to work on developing a sense of humor?
By improving our ability to joke, we strengthen the immune system of the psyche. This is the most important function of this feeling - therapeutic. By putting things through a humorous filter, you can protect yourself from excessive stress, major shocks or disappointments, and depression. In addition to this function, there are several other important functions:
- Cognitive. Humor helps you painlessly perceive reality as it is. It is the optimal means of mastering ideas about the world around us and prevents the emergence of hasty subjective conclusions.
- Educational. A healthy ability to joke helps to gently but firmly instruct children. It's also interesting that the fear of being ridiculed often stops people from doing bad things.
- Entertaining. Humor helps induce relaxation and laughter and lifts your mood. This is an important communication tool that helps to convey joy and positive emotions to each other.
- Regulatory. A good joke can help change the flow of a conversation. Depending on the situation, it will allow you to direct it in a positive direction, correctly interrupt an unpleasant discussion and prevent a brewing conflict.
Basic principles for constructing jokes
Before you begin exercises to develop a sense of humor, it is worth understanding the basics of constructing successful jokes. These five basic patterns will allow you to begin to notice phenomena and events that can become an appropriate reason for laughter. After studying them, you will understand that developing a sense of humor is not a difficult and interesting process!
The mechanism of constructing a joke | Features of the mechanism |
Ambiguous meaning | Words and concepts that have several interpretations are used. For example, when they say “Our planet is 30% land. The remaining 70% is sake.” |
Substitution of the expected | It works by breaking logic and having an unexpected ironic ending. An example would be this announcement about the loss of a watch: “To those who lost their watch in the supermarket, we hasten to inform you: it is exactly noon!” |
Comparison of obviously incomparable things/phenomena | The comic effect is achieved through an absurd comparison. For example: “My life is dear to me, like a memory...” |
Jump | A list of related concepts is used, which are unexpectedly supplemented by something distant from them. Example: “When I go on a date with a guy, it’s important to me that it’s fun and romantic. And so that my husband doesn’t find out about it!” |
Ironic description | Implies the presence of a hidden meaning, which is clearly opposed to what is happening. For example, when they say “This is brilliant!” in case of a ridiculous act or a stupid decision. |
Sense of humor: how to learn to joke
Technique for creating jokes “Irony”
Irony is not difficult to construct. This is done as follows. It is enough to draw a conclusion or evaluate something in words that would be in contrast to the words that arise in this context. Those. We give the exact opposite assessment.
Another version of irony. For example, a person received a promotion at work and shares with you his joy, “Oh, I was promoted!” In contrast to him, you commented “Did you jump?”, instead of “Congratulations, well done.”
Reception examples:
- Tell the lazy person: - Yes, you are an honored hero of labor, a workaholic, you work tirelessly. - To a stupid person - Oh, you’re just a brilliant thinker. - To a man in a tracksuit - Where are you dressed up like that? For a wedding? — About cold and rainy weather — In such weather it’s great to swim and sunbathe. — For a person who drinks and smokes — Do you lead a healthy lifestyle?
Technique for creating jokes “Jump”
A leap from characteristics united by a common feature to a characteristic that has nothing in common with the previous ones. For example: “Girls love young, long-legged and politically literate men” (from the film “The Golden Calf”), “The Janissaries have no pity for women, children, or underground Soviet millionaires” (from the same place).
Unification of the ununitable. A particular example of a Leap. As an example, “Doesn’t the constitution guarantee us the right to a free life, to beer, to boobs?” ("Happy together").
The technique is created like this: when listing related concepts, it is enough to add to this group an unrelated concept that is distant.
More examples:
Dialogue between two friends: - What is the most important thing for you in a date with a man? - Three things. - Which? - Firstly, so that I feel passion for this man. Secondly, everything should happen in a beautiful romantic setting. And thirdly, so that the husband does not find out anything.
- Go buy some goodies: cake, ice cream, chocolate, matches. — I want to date a girl who is kind, beautiful, smart and has an apartment in the center of Moscow. - 10 gold, 16 silver, 4 bronze, 8 milk and 3 primary - this is the result of the performance of the Russian boxing team. — To enter this institute you need to know several foreign languages, be smart, diligent and rich. “Everything in the room spoke of the good taste of the owners: an expensive Persian carpet, a carved wooden chair, an antique bookcase and two corpses neatly laid out in the Baroque style. — A good car should be comfortable, fast and a foreign car.
Under what circumstances should you definitely not joke?
Much of the effect of a joke depends on the circumstances in which it was voiced. You should not use your sense of humor when tragedies or disasters occur nearby. An obvious desire to emphasize one's superiority or to cause offense through humor is a bad idea.
Attempts to make jokes on religious or political topics also have questionable success. They can only make the audience laugh if everyone present is clearly united by the same interests.
When trying to defuse the situation with a comic digression, always calmly and carefully assess the situation and the participants in the conversation. Be careful when making jokes in front of managers or older people. Don't forget about subordination.
Exercises for effectively developing a sense of humor
To better understand how to develop a sense of humor, use exercises. Problems will be especially useful for developing associative thinking and imagination. If an exercise doesn't work out for you, move on to the next one temporarily. Be sure to come back later and try again! Persistence is the key to intellectual growth and the ability to look at a situation from different angles, which helps you notice the funny. This is what will help you successfully cope with such a task as developing a sense of humor.
Endings in sentences
An interesting exercise, often used in the popular game "KVN" as a warm-up. The point is to come up with witty and comic endings to sentences.
original name
Open funny photos in a search engine. Practice coming up with bright and comical names for them.
Crazy offer
Choose any letter of the alphabet, and then make a sentence in which each word begins with it. There should be at least 10-12 words.
Association games
Instill in yourself the habit of quickly coming up with several associations for a certain word. You can also supplement this exercise with the opposite action - a selection of concepts that are distant (and even absurd) in meaning.
Polysemy of words
Pay attention to the different meanings of the same words, as well as to different concepts that reflect the essence of the same thing. Learn modern slang.
Purpose of the item
Look around and focus on one object (table, box, closet, dishes, etc.). Think about how funny it can be used for other purposes.
Search for similar characteristics
Choose two completely unrelated and different concepts. For example, let it be “hippopotamus” and “chair”. Now turn on your imagination and think about how they are similar and how they can be interconnected.
How to develop a sense of humor
To develop your sense of humor, you can try one of five basic techniques:
- Practice plus analysis.
- Copying others.
- Searching for the unusual in the world around us.
- Telling funny stories/anecdotes.
- Work on creativity and intelligence.
In addition to them, there are other techniques. There are also a lot of little tips. But more about that later, now about the basic techniques. If anything, they can be combined with each other.
Practice plus analysis
Humans naturally learn best through action . Therefore, to develop a sense of humor, you need to practice more. But it's not that simple.
If you just joke, the skill will remain approximately at the same level. Therefore, you need to learn to analyze. There is a rule: “If you don’t understand whether you are doing good or bad, then you are doing bad.” It is applicable in all areas where there are no objective indicators.
And it is worth analyzing yourself in two directions:
- Do others laugh at jokes?
- Are the jokes themselves funny? There are simply people who just need to show the finger (or a sitcom on STS) to make them laugh.
Copying others
To learn how to joke, you should find someone who is already good at it . First of all, look in TV shows. Yes, yes, the humor there is better than on the Internet.
The thing is that humor on the Internet is aimed at teenagers. Therefore, the quality there is noticeably lower. Especially in all sorts of VKontakte groups. There is practically no quality humor there.
And the best quality humor is mostly in English. You can look for translations of speeches by foreign comedians. But it's better to watch in the original.
And here you can already try to imitate someone you like. You can copy the presentation, as well as the style (black humor, absurdity, etc.).
You can also simply memorize the best jokes. Firstly, it will improve the taste. Secondly, it’s simply appropriate to tell someone else’s joke.
Searching for the unusual in the world around us
What makes you laugh the most is the inconsistencies in the world around you. Most jokes are based on this. Only there is already a fictional reality.
But it’s worth starting just with the oddities. Russia (I mean, the world) is full of incomprehensible moments. It's enough to just start noticing them. This is already enough to make your friends laugh.
The main benefit will be that the person will feel more confident. And he will also begin to understand what humor can be.
In addition, attentiveness and creativity develop . The first will help you read people, so you can tailor a joke to the person. The second is to find humor even where there is none.
Telling funny stories/jokes
If nothing interesting or funny happens in life, then you can tell jokes.
The benefit will be mainly in improving the storytelling skill . It is worth paying special attention to presentation.
Besides, to choose the right joke, you need to have good taste. This is a great opportunity to develop your sense of humor. People around you will also happily laugh at good jokes.
But it’s better, after all, to find something funny in your life. In fact, even in an ordinary walk you can find something funny. You just need to present it well. Therefore, telling a story from life better develops a sense of humor .
Working on creativity and intelligence
You can try to develop a sense of humor in another way. This has nothing to do with jokes. just need to pay more attention to how your brain works .
First of all, you should work on creativity. It is this that determines the quality of humor. Creativity is essential for jokes.
Then it’s worth expanding your horizons . The more you know, the more varied your humor. This is very useful, as you can joke about any topic. Thanks to this you can make almost everyone laugh.
Well, only then it’s worth working on your intelligence and vocabulary . The first will allow you not to lower the bar of humor. The second is to use words more accurately and better.
Tips for effectively developing a sense of humor and wit
- Try to find a reason to be happy and smile every morning. Spend 5-10 minutes deliberately thinking about reasons for happiness and laughter. Starting a new day with positive emotions and humor, you will quickly develop the habit of approaching everything with a sense of humor.
- Expand your vocabulary by reading books and watching educational videos. Pay attention to the classics of the humorous genre (B. Shaw, O. Henry, A. Chekhov, etc.). By becoming more well-read and erudite, you will be able to react faster to what is happening and describe it more eloquently. You will be able to support any conversation and choose the appropriate witty joke for any environment.
- Follow new performances of your favorite comedians and study their style. Select a few well-known comedians and regularly watch their new performances, analyzing the features of their approach. Write down the techniques and jokes you like in a separate notebook. First, practice creating something similar to them. Over time, you can develop your own style based on elements of their experience and personal additions.
- Work on your self-esteem. Often a person mentally comes up with funny comments for what is happening and witty jokes, but is afraid to voice them. In this case, it is important to work on self-esteem and self-confidence. Contact a psychologist or attend a personal growth training.